“Kami saling mencintai, dan itulah yang penting,” kata pasangan yang sedang jatuh cinta setelah kawin. Tapi mereka menemukan kalau hal itu tidak pernah seperti itu. Tidak ada pasangan Kristen yang berdiri sendiri. Mereka bagian dari unit yang lebih besar disebut Tubuh Kristus (Eph. 1:22, 23), pemilik rumah yang beriman (Gal. 6:10), Rumah Tuhan (Eph. 2:19). Keluarga Tuhan lebih luas dari satu keluarga, dan kita akan belajar kalau hubungan kita terhadap keluarga rohani yang lebih besar ini mempengaruhi hubungan kita dengan suami atau istri. Hal ini tidak pernah lebih jelas dari kisah Ananias dan Saphira.

Mereka hidup dimasa gereja mengalami kemurnian dan kuasa terbesarnya. Pertama, kita melihat keadaaan gereja dalam era kerasulan, “Adapun kumpulan orang yang telah percaya itu, mereka sehati dan sejiwa, dan tidak seorangpun yang berkata, bahwa sesuatu dari kepunyaannya adalah miliknya sendiri, tetapi segala sesuatu adalah kepunyaan mereka bersama” (Acts 4:32). Ini sangat luar biasa. Jumlah orang percaya mungkin sudah 5.000 saat itu, dan mereka satu hati dan jiwa. Hati sering digunakan dalam Alkitab untuk menunjuk bagian manusia yang tidak materi, termasuk roh dan jiwa. Tapi berbeda dari jiwa, mungkin hanya menunjuk pada roh, bagian paling dalam manusia, pusat keberadaannya dimana Tuhan menyatakan diriNya dan tempat dimana Tuhan berdiam. Orang Kristen mula-mula ini saling terikat satu sama lain. Roh mereka bersatu dalam kehidupan Kristus dan kasih Kristus. Mereka tahu kalau mereka semua bersaudara dalam Kristus.

Tapi Alkitab berkata kalau mereka juga satu jiwa, dan itu sesuatu yang berbeda. Jiwa adalah kekeuatan kesadaran hidup dalam manusia, kepribadiannya, terdiri dari pikiran, emosi, dan kehendak. Inilah tingkatan dimana manusia berpikir, merasa, dan membuat pilihan. Ini wilayah pengalaman. Orang Kristen mula-mula tidak hanya satu karena kedudukan mereka dalam Kristus, tapi mereka juga satu dalam pengalaman. Mereka sehati, mereka saling memperhatikan, dan keputusan mereka mencerminkan perhatian mereka. Mereka tidak hanya duduk bersama selama kebaktian, kemudian pulang rumah dan melupakan saudara mereka. Karena jemaat mereka sangat besar, saat mereka bertemu ditempat ibadah, mereka juga berkumpul dalam unit yang lebih kecil dalam rumah untuk lebih saling mengenal, untuk bertumbuh dalam kasih, untuk saling memperhatikan masalah dan melayani kebutuhan (cf. Acts 2:46).

Perhatian kasih mereka begitu dalam sehingga melibatkan dompet mereka, dan itu baru perhatian! Mereka sadar bahwa apapun yang mereka dapat dari Tuhan, diberikan pada mereka bukan untuk digunakan sendiri tapi untuk dibagikan dengan orang percaya lainnya. Tidak ada paksaan. Setiap orang percaya bebesa memiliki harta dan tidak ada yang memandang rendah hal itu. Tapi sebagian besar dari mereka menjual miliknya dan memberikan uang itu pada para rasul untuk dibagikan pada mereka yang, dari semua kemungkinan, kehilangan pekerjaan karena iman mereka. Mereka mengorbankan kenyamanan untuk kebaikan semuanya.

Hasil dari ketidakeogisan ini adalah kuasa dan berkat yang besar diseluruh gereja. “Dan dengan kuasa yang besar rasul-rasul memberi kesaksian tentang kebangkitan Tuhan Yesus dan mereka semua hidup dalam kasih karunia yang melimpah-limpah” (Acts 4:33). Jemaat yang saling memperhatikan merupakan jemaat yang kuat, karena energi dinamis ini merupakan pernyataan kasih Tuhan yang asli. Yesus mengatakan kalau hal ini menjadi tanda muridnya yang sejati (John 13:35), dan dimanapun itu ada, akan menarik orang seperti mata air dipadang gurun.

Itu menarik pasangan bernama Ananias dan Safira. Mereka terhitung diantara yang orang percaya yang kuat. Nama Safira berarti “indah” atau “menyenangkan” nama yang sama diberikan kebatu mulia, Safir. Ananias berarti “Yehova murah hati,” dan Tuhan jelas murah hati padanya. Dia memberikannya istri yang cantik, memberkatinya dengan harta, mengampuni dosanya, dan membawa dia kedalam persekutuan dengan orang yang benar-benar peduli padanya. Seorang pria tidak bisa minta lebih dari itu.

Tapi Ananias ingin lebih, demikian juga Safira. Mereka ingin lebih dari penerimaan; mereka ingin pengakuan. Mereka ingin lebih dari sekedar anggota Tubuh; mereka ingin menjadi anggota Tubuh yang penting. Mereka ingin dipuji manusia. Dan itu membawa kita kepada dosa Ananias dan Safira. Orang percaya yang berdedikasi dan tidak egois sering mendapat pujian dan penghormatan dari orang Kristen yang lain. Jika mereka orang yang benar-benar rohani, tidak akan termotivasi oleh keinginan dipuji manusia, tapi mungkin mereka tetap mendapatkannya. Orang-orang digereja mula-mula yang menjual harta mereka dan memberikan uang kegereja mungkin diterima dengan sangat baik diseluruh jemaat. Barnabas merupakan salah satu yang menyumbangkan semuanya (Acts 4:36, 37). Itu pasti disambut sangat baik. Tidak ada petunjuk kesombongan didadalamnya. Pikirannya hanyalah kebutuhan orang Kristen yang lain dan kemuliaan Tuhan. Tapi pengakuan atasnya ada. Ananias dan Safira melihat hal itu dan menginginkannya, dan disitulah masalah mereka berawal.

Menginginkan pujian manusia sudah merupakan bukti yang cukup kalau motivasi mereka dari kedagingan bukan dari Roh. Tapi itu menjadi lebih jelas bagi kita saat kita belajar bahwa kepastian masa depan mereka ada pada jumlah uang dibank daripada dalam Tuhan. Mereka tidak bisa menanggung apa yang dilakukan orang lain—memberikan seluruhnya pada Tuhan dan sepenuhnya percaya pada kesetiaanNya memenuhi kebutuhan mereka. Mereka harus memiliki uang itu. Dan pernyataan kedagingan yaitu, keinginan dipuji, dan pengangan mereka pada harta, meletakan mereka dalam dilemma. Bagaimana mereka bisa dipuji atas apa yang mereka beri pada jemaat tanpa meletakan semuanya dialtar korban? Mereka akhirnya mendapat solusi. Menipu!

“Ada seorang lain yang bernama Ananias. Ia beserta isterinya Safira menjual sebidang tanah. Dengan setahu isterinya ia menahan sebagian dari hasil penjualan itu dan sebagian lain dibawa dan diletakkannya di depan kaki rasul-rasul” (Acts 5:1, 2). Mereka bekerjasama merencanakan untuk menyimpan sebagian uang dari penjualan milik mereka dalam kotak deposit dan sisanya diberikan pada para rasul. Mereka tidak akan mengatakan kalau mereka memberikan semua uang dari penjualan; mereka membiarkan orang mengira seperti itu. Dan, mereka pasti langsung dikenal sebagai orang percaya yang rohani, mengorbankan diri yang sudah menyerahkan semuanya pada Yesus Kristus.

Apa yang salah dengan rencana mereka? Mereka tidak benar-benar berbohong kan? Mereka hanya memberikan uang dan tidak berkata apa-apa tentang persentase yang diberikan. Bukankah mereka tidak tahan dengan apa kata orang? Tapi mereka bisa. Petrus, melalui pengertian dari Tuhan, membuka rencana mereka sebagai rencana dari Setan dan menyebutnya berbohong pada Roh (Acts 5:3). Dia menjelaskan bahwa mereka tidak diharuskan menjual milik mereka. Dan bahkan setelah mereka menjualnya, mereka tidak diharuskan memberikan seluruhnya kegereja. Tapi mereka diharuskan untuk jujur (Acts 5:4). Dosa utama dari Ananias dan Safira adalah ketidak jujuran, penipuan, berpura-pura, memberikan kesan yang salah tentang diri mereka, menunjukan kerohanian yang lebih besar dari sebenarnya, membiarkan orang lain berpikir lebih dari yang sebenarnya. Mereka lebih tertarik dalam apa yang kelihatan dari pada yang sebenarnya. Petrus berkata, “Engkau bukan mendustai manusia, tetapi mendustai Allah” (Acts 5:4).

Pernakah anda bertanya hubungan seperti apa yang terjadi antara Ananias dan Safira? Walau mereka menunjukan kebersamaan yang hebat dalam perencanaan penipuan mereka, kebohongan mereka pasti mempengaruhi perkawinan mereka. Saat bagi kita penampakan luar lebih penting dari kenyataan, orang-orang yang hidup dengan kita biasanya menderita karena itu. Kita dengan cermat menutupi kebanyakan kedagingan kita dihadapan yang lain, tapi menyimpannya dibelakang keluarga kita, kita cenderung menggantung semua itu—semua kemarahan, sifat, ketidakbaikan dan tidak peka, tuntutan egois, kesombongan, dan kekanakan. Dan sebagai hasilnya, banyak keluarga Kristen diwarnai dengan perselisihan dan pertengkaran. Tapi saat orang Kristen lain yang mungkin bisa menolong kita bertanya tentang keluarga, kita langsung menjawab, “Oh, baik-baik saja. Kita semakin baik dari sebelumnya.” Dan kita menutupi kebohongan kita dengan alasan semua yang terjadi dalam keluarga merupakan hal pribadi. Tapi kebohongan meningkatkan beban rasa bersalah, dan rasa bersalah membawa kita lebih mempertahankan diri dan terganggu, dan rasa terganggu menghasilkan lebih banyak ketidakcocokan dalam keluarga. Itu merupakan salah satu jebakan favorit setan.

Keinginan daging untuk dipuji dan jadi yang utama seperti ditunjukan Ananias dan Safira bisa mempengaruhi hubungan pernikahan. Itu menyebabkan setiap pasangan mencari kepentingannya sendiri dalam hubungan itu. Dia memberi untuk mendapat balasan, dan dia biasanya menghitung apa yang sudah didapatnya. Jika dia pikir bertemu dengan jalan buntu, dia akan bertengkar dan mengeluh sampai mendapat apa yang menurutnya dia layak dapatkan. Setiap pasangan terus menghitung siapa yang memberi paling banyak, mendapat perhatian paling banyak, yang paling banyak mendapat pujian, yang paling banyak salah, atau hal-hal lainnya. Kebutuhan setiap pasangan untuk lebih baik dari pasangannya menyebakan mereka menyembunyikan kepribadian mereka yang sebenarnya, dan itu membawa dia lebih kedalam kemunafikan.

Marilah kita jujur. Marilah kita menyerahkan diri kita sepenuhnya kepada kejujuran dan transparansi. Itulah satu-satunya cara menghancurkan jebakan iblis. Saat kita mengakui perasaan dan motivasi kita yang sebenarnya pada orang lain, saat kita mengakui kesalahan yang sebenarnya dan minta orang lain mendoakan kita, itu menyediakan pertolongan untuk meminta kuasa Tuhan mengubahnya. Kita tahu bahwa suatu hari orang itu akan bertanya apa yang terjadi dan kita harus mengatakan dengan jujur. Kita ingin siap ketika waktu itu datang, karena dengan kejujuran, kita akan lebih memperhatikan kehormatan Tuhan dan kesaksian atas gereja Kristus. Jadi kita harus mengijinkan Roh Yesus Kristus untuk membawa kita lebih serupa denganNya. Maka kita mampu berhenti bermain-main dengan kebohongan. Kita akan jadi yang sebenarnya!

Para suami dan istri bisa mulai jujur. Mereka bisa mengakui satu sama lain apa yang ada didalam mereka, kemudian saling menguatkan dan mendoakan kelemahan masing-masing. Mereka juga perlu jujur dengan Tuhan. Jika prilaku mereka salah, mereka harus mengakuinya secara terbuka pada Tuhan dan menolak untuk beralasan. Hanya dengan itu mereka mampu bertumbuh secara rohani. Ananias dan Safira bekerjasama menyetujui rencana jahat itu, tapi mereka tidak pernah mengakui dosanya kepada yang lain dan Tuhan. Saat seorang suami dan istri bekerjasama dalam menipu, itu akan menghancurkan mereka.

Akhirnya kita melihat pada, pentingnya pendisiplinan mereka. Petrus tidak meminta penghukuman dari surga. Dia hanya membuka kebohongan Ananias melalui pengertian dari Tuhan. “Ketika mendengar perkataan itu rebahlah Ananias dan putuslah nyawanya” (Acts 5:5). Itu merupakan tangan disiplin Tuhan. “Lalu datanglah beberapa orang muda; mereka mengapani mayat itu, mengusungnya ke luar dan pergi menguburnya” (Acts 5:6). Kita tidak tahu bagaimana mereka bisa mengubur Ananias tanpa diketahui Safira, tapi tubuh orang mati harus dikubur secepatnya pada masa itu dan mungkin itulah sebabnya mereka tidak bisa menemukan Safira saat itu. Dia mungkin sedang keluar belanja, menghabiskan uang yang sudah disalahgunakan.

Tiga jam kemudian dia datang mencari suaminya, tidak sadar apa yang terjadi. Petrus memberikannya kesempatan untuk jujur. “Katakanlah kepadaku, dengan harga sekiankah tanah itu kamu jual? Jawab perempuan itu: Betul sekian” (Acts 5:8). Dan Petrus menyatakan bahwa dia akan mengalami hal yang sama seperti Ananias.

Kita ciut melihat gambaran pendisiplinan ilahi ini. Kita mungkin merasa Tuhan berlebihan terhadap hal ini. Kenapa Dia melakukannya? Dia kelihatan tidak berlaku seperti itu sekarang. Dan kita bisa bersyukur untuk itu! Tapi masa itu berbeda. Itu adalah masa pembentukan gereja. Sampai masa itu tidak ada hal yang berlebihan, dan Tuhan melakukan itu agar dilihat gereja. Dari kejadian itu, Tuhan ingin semua mengetahui betapa Dia membenci kebohongan, dan Dia ingin semua mengetahuinya sepanjang masa. Itulah alasan Dia meletakan kisah ini dalam FirmanNya.

Kerohanian yang palsu sangat menular. Itu menyebar. Saat seorang Kristen meliha orang Kristen lain terbawa, dia menemukan lebih mudah mencobanya sendiri. Dan setiap anggota yang berada dibawa kuasa kedagingan daripada Roh, dan setiap orang yang hidup untuk dipuji manusia daripada kemuliaan Tuhan, maka efektifitas gereja sangat dikurangi. Jika Tuhan mengijinkan Ananias dan Safira melanjutkan kebohongan mereka, itu akan menghancurkan kesaksian gereja mula-mula. Dia harus bertindak tegas.

Sayangnya, waktu telah melemahkan kemurnian gereja, dan kita semakin jauh dari keunikan masa kerasulan, kita bahkan sulit mengenali kepura-puraan kita. Kita mengerti kemunafikan adalah usaha untuk menipu seperti Ananias dan Safira, dan kita mungkin tidak secara sadar melakukannya. Kita mungkin hanya jatuh pada kebiasaan melindungi nama baik, menutupi kedagingan kita, menjaga agar orang lain tidak mengetahui apa yang terjadi dalam hati dan keluarga kita. Itu lebih mudah daripada menyerahkan diri kita sepenuhnya pada Kristus dan membiarkan Dia hidup melalui kita dan membuat perubahan yang diinginkanNya. Bentuk kemunafikan seperti ini menjadi cara hidup gereja Yesus Kristus masa kita, dan mungkin itulah alasan kita tidak bisa memberi dampak bagi masyarakat kita yang sudah tidak dalam Tuhan.

Suatu pertanyaan berkepanjangan dalam pikiran kita setelah melihat hidup Ananias dan Safira. Apa yang lebih penting bagi kita—menjaga agar terlihat rohani, atau dengan murni ingin menjadi seperti apa yang Tuhan kehendaki? Membangung penampakan luar saja membawa kematian—kematian pertumbuhan rohani, kematian dalam keluarga Tuhan, dan kematian pertumbuhan hubungan dengan pasangan hidup, sebagai suami atau istri. Tapi Roh Tuhan bisa menggunakan keterbukaan, untuk menghasilkan kita hidup Kristus, dan itu berarti hidup berkelimpahan, sukacita, dan berkat yang berlimpah.

Mari kita bicara

1. Bagaimana Ananias dan Safira bisa menghindari perangkap penipuan, agar tidak jatuh??

2. Apa yang paling sering disembunyikan orang Kristen dari orang percaya lain?

3. Apakah ada hal yang anda setujui bersama tapi tidak benar dihadapan Tuhan? Apa yang Tuhan inginkah anda perbuat terhadap hal itu?

4. Hal apa yang paling sering disembunyikan istri dan suami dari pasangannya?

5. Apa resiko suami dan istri saling terbuka?

6. Seberapa baik anda bisa didekati? Tanyakan pasangan anda, mudah atau tidak jujur pada anda. Kenapa atau kenapa tidak ??

7. Apakah ada tanda anda berusaha bersaing untuk lebih tinggi dalam hubungan anda? Bagaimana anda menghindari kecenderungan ini?

What makes someone human? This question starts us on the journey toward understanding our identity in Christ. We are called to Christ as human beings, so we must understand the fundamental purpose of human beings. This session explores God’s purpose in creating humankind. What binds us all together?

In future sessions, we’ll discuss aspects of our identity that are “earthly.” Our earthly identity includes those traits that all of humankind—both believers and nonbelievers—possess. After that, we’ll examine aspects of our identity that are entirely “heavenly” —characteristics we have because we’ve trusted in Christ.

For now, though, what do we share in common as human beings?

Session Aims

• Individual Aim: To identify universal characteristics of human nature from chapters 1–2 of the book of Genesis.
• Group Aim: To gain a greater understanding of human nature and its effects on human experiences.

Preparation

Complete Biblical Exercise: Genesis 1–2 beginning on page 20.

Read Session 1: Human Nature.

Biblical Exercise: Genesis 1–2

Read the first two chapters of Genesis. Also, read “A Method for the Biblical Exercises” beginning on page 17.

Observation — “What Do I See?”

1. Who are the persons (including God) in the passage? What is the condition of those persons?

2. What are they saying or doing? (Look especially for statements or actions that are emphasized, repeated, related, alike, unalike, or true to life.)

3. When did this take place?

4. Where did this take place?

5. Why did it happen?

•  What changed between the beginning and the end of chapter 1?
•  What changed between the beginning and the end of chapter 2?

Interpretation Phase 1 — “What Did It Mean Then?”

1. Coming to Terms —Are there any words in the passage that youdon’t understand? Write down anything you found confusing about the passage.

2. Finding Where It Fits—What clues does the Bible give about the meaning of this passage?

•  Immediate Context (the passage being studied)
•  Remote Context (passages that come before and after the one being studied)

3. Getting into Their Sandals—An Exercise in Imagination (Focus on Genesis 2 for this exercise.)

•  How did it look?
•  How did it sound?
•  How did it smell?
•  How did it feel?
•  How did it taste?

Interpretation Phase 2 — “What Does It Mean Now?”

1. What is the timeless truth in the passage? In one or two sentences, write down what you learned about God from Genesis 1–2.

2. How does that truth work today?

Application — “What Can I Do to Make This Truth Real?”

1. What can I do to make this truth real for myself?

2. For my family?

3. For my friends?

4. For the people who live near me?

5. For the rest of the world?

Introduction

“What am I doing here?” For those who believe in the one God of the Bible, the answer is found in the book of Genesis. Its first two chapters describe how God made humans and their world. Debates about the process by which God made the universe can become heated. However, the main topic of the chapters is God’s purpose in creating the world. The central figures are God and the human species. What we want to focus on in this session is the fundamental purpose of human beings. This session is not intended to address evolutionism and creationism. Rather, it centers on identifying God’s purpose for creating humankind.

Content

Genesis 1 describes creation in a pattern involving two purposes: ruling and multiplying. God created the sun, moon, and stars to rule impersonally over the earth. He created the animals to multiply on the earth. Humans, however, were created to both multiply and rule over creation. Obviously, our form of ruling over the earth is different from that of the sun, moon, and stars. Genesis 2 further explains that distinction by narrowing the lens to the creation of Adam and Eve.

This chapter adds a new element to the creation of humans: relationship. The heavenly bodies rule over the earth without personal relationships.

They have no sense of personhood. However, God gives to humankind the capacity of relationship, both with the Creator and with one another. Relationship involves the abilities to reason and to communicate through language.

After making these observations, we must interpret the passage’s meaning. First, from God’s actions in these chapters, what do we learn about Him?

•  God is a God of order. (Creation is a process.)
•  God is eternal. (As Creator He preexists all that is created.)
•  God is omnipotent (all-powerful).
•  God is sovereign. (He holds absolute authority.)
•  God is relational. (He created humans to be in relationship with Him and with each other.)
•  God creates with purpose (sun and moon to rule, birds and fish to multiply, mankind to multiply and rule).
•  God alone is God—there is no other. (He is the Creator; no other god precedes Him.)
•  Next, what do we learn about ourselves?
•  We are significant (made by God, made in His image, highest of earthly creatures).
•  We are created to rule the earth, not to be ruled by it. (We have work to do; we have purpose; we have responsibility.)
•  We were created to be dependent upon the earth (given plants to eat).
•  We are dependent upon God. (He gave us life; He gives us food to stay alive.)

What are the implications for us? First, every human has a broad purpose from the Creator God. We all share this universal aspect of our identity: We are to multiply and rule relationally. God intentionally created Adam with a relational nature. God saw Adam alone and said, “It is not good” (Genesis 2:18). Because we all share this relational nature, we must be designed to work together. Each person was not given his or her own “earth” to govern. Instead, we are all designed to rule, but to rule together as peers. No human has a right to rule in an absolute manner over any other. Hierarchy among human beings may be necessary for a purpose and even ordained by God in a particular context (such as parental authority over children and governing officials over citizens), but there is no indication in Genesis or elsewhere that one person has absolute authority over another. There is no class of humans that is above or below the others.

Second, God is in the business of bringing order out of chaos. From the formless mass He created an ordered universe. Likewise, part of the image of God in us is to bring order out of chaos. Rulers make judgments about what should be done. They choose between options on moral bases. The heavenly bodies are animated by fixed laws of nature. But humans are able to make choices based on moral judgment. They are not completely at the mercy of their environment but can order and change their environment.

Third, God made “male” and “female” in His own image. Humans were created to be an image or visible expression of God’s nature. Obviously, God’s image in humankind is limited. It’s not a replication of Him, like some sort of clone. Rather, men and women were created to display on earth a physically present image of its Creator. And because both Adam and Eve were created with this image, it’s clear that men and women both were designed to glorify their Creator.

So we see three aspects of human nature:

•  Humankind was created to have a shared purpose of ruling over the earth in cooperation with one another and mutual submission to God’s authority (see Genesis 1:26-28).
•  Humankind was created to order our own lives and the earth in accordance with moral imperatives (see Genesis 2:15-17). God designed humans to live in obedience to His commands.
•  Humankind was created to reflect the Creator’s nature and glory (see Genesis 1:27; Exodus 34:29-35).

Conclusion

Human identity is grounded in God’s design: We are to be mutually submissive to God’s authority, rule over our lives and the earth with moral judgment, and display His image to the physical world. This insight gives Christians a distinctive view of the dignity of all human beings. Regardless of our circumstances, our lives have purpose. Our purpose depends not on what we do (for instance, our jobs) but on how we do what we do, as we will see in “Session 2: Roles.”

Assignment

Read Session 2: Roles.

Read Life Inventory: Introduction on page 89.

Complete the Life Inventory: Roles exercise beginning on page 91.

Session 2 introduced the distinction between role and identity. We usually express roles in statements about what we do (“I am an engineer”), while identity statements express who we are, regardless of what we do (“I am trustworthy”). The attributes of identity, what sort of person we are, will go with each of us into whatever roles we fill and will transform the ways we carry out any given role.

We must grasp this distinction as we move into the discussion of gender. Gender is one key component of identity. Being a man or being a woman affects our outlook on life in ways we may be unaware of. In this session we will ask, “What kind of man or woman am I?” and “Where and from whom did I learn to be that kind of man or woman?”

Session Aims

• Individual Aim: To explore past influences and present views regarding gender.
• Group Aim: To gain greater understanding of the influence of gender on how people think and act.

Preparation

Read Session 3: Gender.

Complete the Life Inventory: Gender exercise beginning on page 94.

Introduction

While our biological sex traits (anatomy and physiology) are determined at birth, our sense of what it means to be male or female, masculine or feminine, develops through our family, culture, and experiences. One striking example in Scripture that points to the difference between men and women is when God gives distinct curses to Adam and Eve after they eat the forbidden fruit:

To the woman he said,

“I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.”

To Adam he said, “Because you listened to your wife and ate from the tree about which I commanded you, ‘You must not eat of it,’

“Cursed is the ground because of you;
through painful toil you will eat of it
all the days of your life.

It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground, since from it you were taken; for dust you are and to dust you will return.” (Genesis 3:16-19)

Content

A proper understanding of sexuality and gender must be based on Scripture. While it’s not within the scope of this study to give a complete overview, we’ll flesh out a few fundamental ideas.

First, men and women are equal as God’s representatives:

In the Lord, however, woman is not independent of man, nor is man independent of woman. For as woman came from man, so also man is born of woman. But everything comes from God. (1 Corinthians 11:11-12)

Scripture never portrays either men or women as superior to the other in foundational issues, such as one’s potential to glorify God.

The Creation account provides the bedrock for understanding gender issues throughout Scripture:

So God created man in his own image,
in the image of God he created him;
male and female He created them. (Genesis 1:27)

Raymond Ortlund Jr., pastor and former professor at Trinity Evangelical Divinity School, notes the distinct emphasis in each line:

Line one asserts the divine creation of man. We came from God. Line two overlaps with line one, except that it highlights the divine image in man. We bear a resemblance to God. Line three boldly affirms the dual sexuality of man. We are male and female.

This passage in Genesis demonstrates that each human being reflects God’s image. Humankind is the image bearer, and humankind is male and female. As the Creation account continues, both man and woman are commissioned to rule and fill the earth. The command in 1:28 is for humans to “be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it.” Humanity has the responsibility to produce life, both spiritual and physical.

Likewise, God commissioned humanity to rule over His creation. Ortlund continues, “Man was created as royalty in God’s world, male and female alike bearing the divine glory equally.”

But the equality of men and women does not diminish the differences between them. The Creation account of Genesis 2 provides insight into these differences. “Then the LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make him a helper suitable for him’” (verse 18). The only part of Creation that God judged as not good was that the first man was alone. But God did not simply create another male human. Adam, representing all maleness, was insufficient to carry out the mandate to fill and subdue the earth apart from the creation of femaleness found in Eve.

Old Testament scholar Allen Ross points out that “helper” (Hebrew: ezer) is not a demeaning term:

God is usually the one described as the “helper” (Exod. 18:4; Deut. 33:7; 1 Sam. 7:12; Ps. 20:2; 46:1). The word essentially describes one who provides what is lacking in the man, who can do what the man alone cannot do.... The man was thus created in such a way that he needs the help of a partner. Or we may say that human beings cannot fulfill their destiny except in mutual assistance.

Ross continues by explaining the concept of a “suitable” helper:

The man and the woman thus correspond physically, socially, and spiritually . . . the woman by relative difference but essential equality would be man’s fitting complement. What he lacked (“not good”) she supplied; and it would be safe to say that what she lacked, he supplied, for life in common requires mutual help.

We can’t overlook the male/female equality before God. Both in personal relationship with God as our Father and in our ability to fulfill the divine mandate for humanity, men and women are equal. But as Ortlund notes, this equality “does not constitute an undifferentiated sameness.” He expands:

The very fact that God created human beings in the dual modality of male and female cautions us against an unqualified equation of the two sexes. This profound and beautiful distinction, which some belittle as “a matter of mere anatomy,” is not a biological triviality or accident. It is God who wants men to be men and women to be women.

What does it mean for men to be men and women to be women? If God made us with differences that are complementary to fulfill the divine commission, how should those differences be expressed?

We would have no problem understanding and living in a truly complementary manner if sin had not entered the world. Sin has devastated interpersonal relationships. God’s judgments in Genesis 3 show how sin has affected the male/female relationship.

In the judgment on Eve in verse 16, God says, “Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.” The term desire in this verse is similar to the usage in Genesis 4:7, where sin desires Cain. It means a prompting for evil. Likewise, the term rule in this verse refers to dominion or mastery. The punishment would fit the crime. As the woman will desire to usurp, rather than complement, male authority, the man will seek to dominate, rather than honor and respect, his “helper.” Ross notes,

If Eve is an archetype, that is, if she represents every woman as Adam represents every man, then the story portrays a characteristic of human nature—the woman at her worst would be a nemesis to the man, and the man at his worst would dominate the woman.

However, with salvation comes a restoration of all aspects of creation. The restoration of true equality can only be found in Christ.

There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise. (Galatians 3:28-29)

Likewise, the restoration of the male/female complementary relationship is found in Christ. As believers who desire to reflect God’s image and promote God’s glory, we must seek to understand what it means to be a Christian man or woman.

Conclusion

Scripture does not clearly define every aspect of gender issues. Even so, we must continue to explore what it means to be a man or woman in Christ. This topic is much debated, but it’s worthwhile for each believer to personally seek wisdom about how gender influences the way roles are performed.

Assignment

Read Session 4: Temperament.

Complete the Life Inventory: Temperament exercise beginning on page 98.

In session 4, we examined how temperament influences our identity. In this session, we’ll look at the final component of earthly identity: heritage. We each have a unique personal history that affects how we answer the question “Who am I?” Such factors as when, where, and to whom we were born all affect our answer. Some additional factors include where we grew up, what schools we attended, what traditions we engaged in, and any major transitions we went through. These are all aspects of our heritage that we carry with us today.

Enjoy this opportunity to trace the foundational roots of your life.

Session Aims

• Individual Aim: To explore your personal heritage and its impact upon your identity.
• Group Aim: To better understand group members’ heritages in order to appreciate the impact on their lives.

Preparation

Read Session 5: Heritage.

Complete the Life Inventory: Heritage exercise beginning on page 109.

Complete the Life Inventory: Values I exercise beginning on page 112.

Introduction

heritage: that which comes or belongs to one by reason of birth; an inherited lot or portion

Heritage is the environment into which someone is born and raised. We might think that because we are redeemed in Christ, our heritage shouldn’t matter. We might reason that if we are mature in Christ, our heritage should affect our identity very little. There are valid biblical truths behind such thoughts. We are now free from the bondage imposed on us by certain aspects of our heritage. For example, someone raised in a family in which fear was the motive for obedience is now free to respond to God in obedience rather than respond to the fear of men, even though the believer may pay a price for following Christ. Or when loving an enemy results in personal pain or loss, the believer is free to pursue a godly life in spite of what his or her heritage may have taught him or her.

Still, sometimes a person’s heritage contains elements that contribute to godly character. For instance, someone raised in a mainstream culture that valued relationships will tend to prioritize people over tasks. In that kind of culture, tasks don’t get in the way of valuing people and relationships.

The purpose of this session is not to judge the value of one’s heritage but rather to take inventory of it. We take this inventory keeping in mind that our heritage does influence the way we live. Ultimately, we want to explore how to respond to what our heritage has taught us—whether to embrace a given inherited trait as godly or to reject it. However, the first step is to identify characteristics from our heritage so that we can later make accurate judgments.

Content

He himself gives all men life and breath and everything else. From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. (Acts 17:25-26)

Although we are citizens of a heavenly culture that has its own heavenly identity, we are still living as citizens of this earth. Missiology scholar David Hesselgrave writes, “Though Christianity is supracultural in its origin and truth, it is cultural in its application.” We apply Christianity in the midst of identities that have been greatly shaped by our heritage.

This truth affects our ability to communicate the Christian message from one culture to another. When sharing the gospel cross-culturally, we must try to make the message clear and accurate in that particular cultural setting. The same principle applies when we try to live out our faith. Our unique heritage affects the way we try to live out our identity in Christ within our communities.

God’s providential hand developed a particular heritage for each person. The story of Joseph illustrates the blessing of seeing God’s purpose through the good and the bad of our backgrounds:

Then Joseph said to his brothers, “Come close to me.” When they had done so, he said, “I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold into Egypt! And now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you. For two years now there has been famine in the land, and for the next five years there will not be plowing and reaping. But God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance.

“So then, it was not you who sent me here, but God. He made me father to Pharaoh, lord of his entire household and ruler of all Egypt.” (Genesis 45:4-8)

For a special purpose, God used Joseph’s unique heritage as a son of Jacob who became an Egyptian civil servant. Although some aspects of our heritage are ungodly and some are godly, God has superintended the entire process and desires to use it uniquely for His glory and our good.

Heritage begins with birth and develops through life circumstances. Although you can state in a few words when, where, and to whom you were born, those facts are more than just data on a page: They have had far-reaching implications in your life.

We’ll focus on three cultural categories from which heritage develops: mainstream culture, family culture, and subcultures.

Mainstream Culture

On the broadest level, mainstream culture involves the historical time period in which we’ve lived. Mainstream culture consists of those characteristics that were realities within the local community where you were born and raised. It might include characteristics of religion (Christian, religious, nonreligious, pluralistic), ethnic environment (homogeneous, multicultural, minority in majority culture), political environment (democracy, socialism, conservative, liberal), media (sources of news and entertainment; exposure to radio, TV, and printed materials), traditions (holidays, historical events, dietary habits, fashion), and art (purpose, emphasis on freedom of expression). While the mainstream culture is the larger environment that influenced you, your family culture reveals more specific expressions of each of these categories.

Family Culture

Family culture is the pattern of behaviors and values that individuals learn because of the way their family related and lived out roles. This culture is the one that influences most people to the greatest degree. It’s the environment in which most people have spent the most time, especially in their early childhood years. Louis Luzbetak, another missiology scholar, writes,

An individual to a large extent reflects the values that he or she has learned (either through intended education, conscious imitation, or unconscious absorption) from those with whom he or she is in contact. In fact, the closer and the earlier the contact, especially if it is continuous, the greater the impact.

Families develop certain patterns of thinking and behavior. For example, one person’s tendency to be aggressive in conflict may stem from the way his or her family typically dealt with it.

Family culture influences some people less than others. As the family unit breaks down, children can become more influenced by the mainstream culture or subcultures.

Subcultures

These are the various environments outside the family culture but distinct from the mainstream culture. An example is the Boy Scouts. For a certain boy, his Boy Scout experience might have provided a subculture that significantly affected his life. This category also includes particular church or parachurch cultures. For people who strongly identify with a particular subculture, its effect on their heritage may be great.

A person’s heritage is both concrete and developing. Looking back at our past, we can see an unchangeable history of experiences in various environments. At the same time, our current experiences and environment are shaping our heritage of tomorrow.

Heritage affects the way people relate with others and fulfill their roles. For instance, people who have been in environments where emotions are expressed through physical contact will likely respond differently than those whose backgrounds are primarily verbal. It’s helpful, then, to understand other people’s heritages as well as our own. In order to grow in our ability to love others, we must understand the “heritage lens” through which we view life as well as the “lenses” through which others see life.

Conclusion

This session neither exalts nor condemns someone’s heritage. The primary objectives are to acknowledge our heritage and learn how it affects our identity. God has sovereignly placed us where He desires us to be. It is only appropriate that we thank Him for our lives and what He plans to do in, through, and with them.

Assignment

Read Session 6: Values.

Complete the Life Inventory: Values II exercise beginning on page 114.

Time Alone with God

Our next session will tackle values and get to the core of why we do what we do. Therefore, now would be a great time for you to be alone with God and reflect on your values. A time of solitude is ideal for doing the “Life Inventory: Values II” exercise, which asks you to be honest with yourself about your real values in your daily living. Here is a suggested plan for using this time alone with God.

Pray

Spend time in silence, prayer, and worship. Focus on God and enjoy His presence. Consider the profound reality that God, who is above and beyond all earthly things, has touched our lives as believers through the work of Christ. Enter into God’s presence, reflect on His glory, and communicate your praise to Him. You may choose to spend some time reading and thinking over some passages from Scripture, or you may just spend some quiet time in worship or prayer.

Reflect on “Values II”

In your “Values I” exercise, you’ve already written your twelve most deeply held values. Use the “Values II” exercise beginning on page 121 to validate your values with specific actions from your life. Think through your life (weekly schedule, relationships, work, ministry, studies) and consider how your life “proves” each value you hold. Write down actions you consistently do that reflect each of your twelve values from the “Values I” section.

Do this with complete honesty before God. You may not be able to substantiate some values. Those are values that you wish were priorities but that you don’t practice as much as you’d like.

Next, go back through your list of values and mark each value as real (values consistent with the way you live) or ideal (values you hold in an idealistic way but can’t validate from patterns in your behavior).

Finally, meditate on what you’ve discovered and ask God these questions:

•  Are the values I listed godly values?
•  How do You want me to change my ideal values into real values? How can I trust You to help me?
•  What other values do You want me to have?

Review

Close with some time in prayer and journal writing. Reflect on what you’ve learned about your identity, and write down any insight from God that your time alone has revealed.