Jacob heard that Laban’s sons were complaining, “Jacob has taken everything that belonged to our father! He has gotten rich at our father’s expense!” When Jacob saw the look on Laban’s face, he could tell his attitude toward him had changed. The Lord said to Jacob, “Return to the land of your fathers and to your relatives. I will be with you.” So Jacob sent a message for Rachel and Leah to come to the field where his flocks were. There he said to them, “I can tell that your father’s attitude toward me has changed, but the God of my father has been with me. You know that I’ve worked for your father as hard as I could, but your father has humiliated me and changed my wages ten times. But God has not permitted him to do me any harm. If he said, ‘The speckled animals will be your wage,’ then the entire flock gave birth to speckled offspring. But if he said, ‘The streaked animals will be your wage,’ then the entire flock gave birth to streaked offspring. In this way God has snatched away your father’s livestock and given them to me. “Once during breeding season I saw in a dream that the male goats mating with the flock were streaked, speckled, and spotted. In the dream the angel of God said to me, ‘Jacob!’ ‘Here I am!’ I replied. Then he said, ‘Observe that all the male goats mating with the flock are streaked, speckled, or spotted, for I have observed all that Laban has done to you. I am the God of Bethel, where you anointed the sacred stone and made a vow to me. Now leave this land immediately and return to your native land.’” Then Rachel and Leah replied to him, “Do we still have any portion or inheritance in our father’s house? Hasn’t he treated us like foreigners? He not only sold us, but completely wasted the money paid for us! Surely all the wealth that God snatched away from our father belongs to us and to our children. So now do everything God has told you.” So Jacob immediately put his children and his wives on the camels. He took away all the livestock he had acquired in Paddan Aram and all his moveable property that he had accumulated. Then he set out toward the land of Canaan to return to his father Isaac. While Laban had gone to shear his sheep, Rachel stole the household idols that belonged to her father. Jacob also deceived Laban the Aramean by not telling him that he was leaving. He left with all he owned. He quickly crossed the Euphrates River and headed for the hill country of Gilead…

Genesis 31 (NET)

How can we faithfully follow God?

In Genesis 28, when Jacob left his family to pursue a wife, God appeared to Jacob and told him that he would be with him and bring him back to Canaan. Now, twenty years, two wives, twelve children, and many flocks later, it was time for Jacob to return. While overseeing Laban’s flocks for the last six years, Jacob used innovative techniques to help the flocks bear dark colored sheep and multi-colored goats, which were his according to his business deal with Laban. Because of this, Jacob became wealthy—in fact, he became wealthier than Laban (v. 1). Though he was prospering, God spoke to him in a dream and told him to return home.

In this narrative, Jacob looks like an Abrahamic figure—obeying God and leaving Haran for the promised land (Gen 12). As we consider this passage, we learn principles about how we can faithfully follow God as well.

Big Question: What principles can we discern about faithfully following God from Jacob’s leaving Laban to return home?

To Faithfully Follow God, We Must Discern God’s Will

Jacob heard that Laban’s sons were complaining, “Jacob has taken everything that belonged to our father! He has gotten rich at our father’s expense!” When Jacob saw the look on Laban’s face, he could tell his attitude toward him had changed. The Lord said to Jacob, “Return to the land of your fathers and to your relatives. I will be with you.” So Jacob sent a message for Rachel and Leah to come to the field where his flocks were. There he said to them, “I can tell that your father’s attitude toward me has changed, but the God of my father has been with me. You know that I’ve worked for your father as hard as I could, but your father has humiliated me and changed my wages ten times. But God has not permitted him to do me any harm. If he said, ‘The speckled animals will be your wage,’ then the entire flock gave birth to speckled offspring. But if he said, ‘The streaked animals will be your wage,’ then the entire flock gave birth to streaked offspring. In this way God has snatched away your father’s livestock and given them to me…

Genesis 31:1-16

While Jacob was working for Laban, Laban’s sons began to complain against him. They declared that Jacob had taken everything away from their father and gotten rich off him (v. 1). Of course, that wasn’t true. Jacob had a fair deal with Laban and had profited from the deal. What was really happening was the sons were jealous. Sons typically would receive their father’s inheritance, and since Jacob was earning many of Laban’s flocks, the sons saw their inheritance diminishing. But not only were Laban’s sons upset, so was Laban. His countenance changed towards Jacob (v. 2).

As Jacob discerns this, he calls for his two wives to meet with him in the field. He shares how God told him to return to his homeland. He also shares how he had worked hard for Laban, but Laban changed his wages ten times. The women replied that Laban had treated them like foreigners. He sold them and used up all the money he gained without giving them any (v. 15). It seems the daughters were hoping that the money would be used as a dowry instead of a bride price. With a dowry, the money would eventually be given to the daughters to help with their marriage¹ or kept for them in case their husband died. However, Laban spent the fourteen years of Jacob’s earnings. Rachel and Leah agreed, probably for the first time since they married Jacob—it was time to go!

In order for Jacob to follow God, he needed to clearly discern God’s will, which was for him to leave Laban and return to Canaan. We must also clearly discern God’s will in order to faithfully follow him. “What university should we go to? What major should we choose? Who should we marry? What job should we take? What type of schooling should we give our children?” In order to follow God’s will, we must many times discern God’s answers to questions like these.

Application Question: What principles about discerning God’s will can be gained from Genesis 31?

1. To discern God’s will, we must consider our hearts’ desires.

In Genesis 30, Jacob approached Laban and said, “Give me my wives and children and let me go home” (v. 25 paraphrase). After that, Laban encouraged him to stay by offering to make him a partner in the business. However, Jacob’s desire to leave Haran and return home, never left him.

This is one of the ways that God guides us into his perfect will—he places certain desires in our hearts. Philippians 2:12-13 says,

So then, my dear friends, just as you have always obeyed, not only in my presence but even more in my absence, continue working out your salvation with awe and reverence, for the one bringing forth in you both the desire and the effort—for the sake of his good pleasure—is God.

God works in us first by giving us the desire to do something and then the power (or effort) to do it. Jacob’s desire to return home was put in his heart by God six years earlier and was later confirmed. Often God does the same with us. He gives us a desire to study his Word more, pray more, and serve in various ways. He also works in our hearts to help us make “major” decisions like who to marry, what job to take, or where to live. Finally, he gives us power to complete those works.

With that said, we must recognize that our hearts can be led astray, and their desires are not always godly. In fact, our hearts’ desires often are against God’s will. Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” It is not only deceitful but often confusing. However, when we are walking with God, living in prayer, his Word, and obedience, God often speaks through our hearts. Psalm 37:4 (ESV) says, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Therefore, in discerning God’s will, we must consider our desires.

In my counseling, I often come across students who are worried God has given them the gift of singleness and that they will be single all their lives. So I ask them, “Do you desire to be single and serve God without any distractions, like a spouse or children?” When they say, “No!” I tell them most likely that’s not their gifting, and if it is, God will give them those desires later. It’s the same with a call to ministry. Yes, initially, we may say, “No!” But God continues to work on our hearts until we are willing, and it’s our pleasure.

As we’re seeking to discern God’s will, we must ask ourselves, “What are my desires?”

2. To discern God’s will, we must consider our circumstances.

With Jacob, God, in his sovereignty, allowed Laban’s sons to become jealous of him and for Laban’s countenance to change towards him. Sure, God was prospering Jacob, which might have seemed like a reason to stay, but his relationships had become toxic. This was part of the way God was leading Jacob to return home.

It’s the same with us. God leads us to his will not only by changing our desires but often by changing our circumstances. Ephesians 1:11 says God “accomplishes all things according to the counsel of his will.” God uses all circumstances to accomplish his will, and therefore, circumstances are often like guide posts for us. God guides us by opening and closing doors. That relationship that ended—most likely wasn’t the one to marry. That job which wasn’t offered—probably wasn’t the right job. Closed doors are especially instructive. Instead of being discouraged by them, we should look at them as God’s guidance and give God thanks for them. Through them he says, “I have something better!”

3. To discern God’s will, we must consider God’s Word.

As mentioned, while working, Jacob had a dream in which God called him to return to his homeland. Since the Scriptures were not yet written during that time, God often spoke in more charismatic ways. God may still speak through charismatic ways today; however, the primary way God speaks to us is through Scripture. Even our seemingly divine promptings must be tested and confirmed by Scripture, as God will never contradict his Word (cf. 1 Cor 4:6, 12:3, 14:29). Again, God primarily speaks to us through his Word. In Psalm 119:105, David said, “Your word is a lamp to walk by, and a light to illumine my path.” While we are in God’s Word, God turns the lights on, so we can better discern his direction. When we’re not faithfully studying God’s Word, we will lack clarity.

Are you living in God’s Word?

4. To discern God’s will, we must seek godly counsel.

With Jacob, though he had strong desires, circumstances, and a Divine dream, he still sought the counsel of his wives. Rachel and Leah confirmed Jacob’s discernment; it was time to leave. In the same way, for us to discern God’s will, we must seek the counsel of others. God has made the church a body, and therefore, we are dependent upon one another. The eye can’t say to the hand I don’t need you. Many times, God will use somebody else in the body to be our eyes—to help us see our circumstances differently and to help us discern the best possible route to take. Proverbs 20:18 says, “Plans are established by counsel, so make war with guidance.” Proverbs 11:14 says, “there is success in the abundance of counselors.”

Who are your counselors who help you discern God’s will and have success?

Apart from Scriptures’ clear leading on moral issues, the other avenues by which God leads us must be tested and not taken absolutely. Difficult circumstances don’t always mean it’s time to quit. Peace doesn’t always mean it’s time to stay. Nor does the counsel of others always constitute God’s will. We must weigh all of these together—often God will guide us through a combination of these. With Jacob, all of these combined to give him strong confirmation of God’s will. Many times, God will do the same with us.

Application Question: In what ways have you experienced God’s guidance through a combination of desires, circumstances, his Word, and godly counsel? In what ways are you currently seeking God’s direction? Who are your counselors, whom you go to for help in discerning God’s will?

To Faithfully Follow God, We Must Be Careful of Fear

While Laban had gone to shear his sheep, Rachel stole the household idols that belonged to her father. Jacob also deceived Laban the Aramean by not telling him that he was leaving. He left with all he owned. He quickly crossed the Euphrates River and headed for the hill country of Gilead…”I left secretly because I was afraid!” Jacob replied to Laban. “I thought you might take your daughters away from me by force.

Genesis 31:19-21, 31

With Jacob and his family, instead of firmly telling Laban that they would be leaving for Canaan, they deceptively packed up and immediately left. Even Moses, the narrator, says Jacob “deceived Laban” (v. 20). They had lived together for twenty years, were business partners, and were family. However, Jacob quickly leaves without saying “good bye.” It is possible to do God’s will in a sinful way. Sometimes God may lead us to confront somebody in sin; however, it is probably not God’s will for us to yell at that person or, worse, slap him in the face. Jacob obeys God but in a deceptive way, which brought negative consequences. He could have lost his favorite wife Rachel, who stole Laban’s household gods (v. 19). When Laban catches them, Jacob swears that whoever stole the gods would die. It is interesting that though Rachel wasn’t caught, not many years later, she dies while giving birth to Jacob’s thirteenth child, Benjamin (Gen 35).

The way Jacob left was not an act of faith but an act of fear. Isaiah 28:16 says, “…The one who maintains his faith will not panic.” In fact, it seems that Rachel’s stealing of Laban’s gods was an act of fear as well. Some believe her stealing of the gods meant that she still worshiped them and was seeking their protection. Evidence for this might be seen in Genesis 35:2-5 where Jacob later commands the members of his household to burn all their idols—which seems to represent a family repentance. This would demonstrate Jacob’s continual passiveness with his wives and lack of spiritual leadership (cf. Gen 29:31-30:24). However, others believe that the theft may have been more of an insurance policy. The Syrian root of the word for “household gods” (teraphim) means “to inquire.”² Laban probably used these idols to inquire and seek direction. Earlier, Laban said that he had learned through “divination” that God was blessing him because of Jacob (Gen 30:25). So Rachel, instead of trusting God, might have been trying to keep Laban from discerning their whereabouts through divination. Another possibility is that she took them, as proof of their property rights. Tablets from an ancient Mesopotamian tribe called the Nuzis showed that household gods were used to demonstrate who was the heir to the family’s property.³ Again, if that was the reason, Rachel was making sure that nobody could say that Jacob stole the flocks from Laban or was planning for Jacob to eventually claim all of Laban’s property.

Either way, both Jacob and Rachel’s actions were not based on faith but fear. Jacob later shares that he left without confirming for fear that Laban would keep his wives (v. 31). Rachel, probably, feared the wrath of her father and the loss of their property. Neither trusted God.

Colossians 3:15 (NIV) says, “Let the peace of Christ rule in our hearts.” Fear will lead us away from doing God’s will, instead of into God’s will. Sadly, many are ruled by fear instead of God’s peace. They are worried about the economy. They are worried about finding a spouse. They are worried about their health. Many times, their fears lead them into irrational thinking and then ungodly decisions. Fear guides them instead of God’s peace.

When Abraham was afraid of losing his wife, he lied and said she was his sister (Gen 12). In the Parable of the Talents, the servant with one talent, instead of investing to make a profit, because of fear, hid it in the ground. He said,

…’Sir, I knew that you were a hard man, harvesting where you did not sow, and gathering where you did not scatter seed, so I was afraid, and I went and hid your talent in the ground. See, you have what is yours.

Matthew 25:24-25

Fear kept him from faithfully following the master and doing his will. This is often true for us. Fear keeps us from taking steps of faith and trusting God. Fear of failure and incompetency keeps us from serving. When God approached Moses about leading Israel, it was fear that almost kept him from his blessings. Moses said, “But God, I can’t speak, and I can’t lead” (Ex 4). After God approached Gideon about leading Israel, he replied, “I’m from the least tribe in Israel, and I’m the least in my family. I’m a nobody! God you’ve got the wrong guy!” (Judges 6). Fear almost kept them from faithfully following God. It often does the same with us.

Are you being led by fear or by faith?

Application Question: What types of fear do you struggle with that potentially could hinder your walk with the Lord? How should we conquer our fears?

To Faithfully Follow God, We Must Be Careful of the World’s Influence

Three days later Laban discovered Jacob had left. So he took his relatives with him and pursued Jacob for seven days. He caught up with him in the hill country of Gilead. But God came to Laban the Aramean in a dream at night and warned him, “Be careful that you neither bless nor curse Jacob.” Laban overtook Jacob, and when Jacob pitched his tent in the hill country of Gilead, Laban and his relatives set up camp there too. “What have you done?” Laban demanded of Jacob. “You’ve deceived me and carried away my daughters as if they were captives of war! Why did you run away secretly and deceive me? Why didn’t you tell me so I could send you off with a celebration complete with singing, tambourines, and harps? You didn’t even allow me to kiss my daughters and my grandchildren good-bye. You have acted foolishly! I have the power to do you harm, but the God of your father told me last night, ‘Be careful that you neither bless nor curse Jacob.’ Now I understand that you have gone away because you longed desperately for your father’s house. Yet why did you steal my gods?” …

Genesis 31:22-42

After three days, Laban realized that Jacob left. Immediately, Laban gathered his relatives and pursued Jacob for seven days and finally caught up with him. However, in a dream at night, the Lord warned Laban, saying, “Be careful that you neither bless nor curse Jacob” (v. 24). This Hebrew expression, in the context, seems to mean, “Don’t use either flattery or threats to try to persuade Jacob to return.”⁴ Laban’s original plan must have been to make Jacob return either by blessing, like a sweeter business deal, or a curse, like taking Jacob’s wives and children. However, God forbade him from doing so. God kept Laban from hindering Jacob’s obedience.

Laban is a picture of the world. He lived for money and riches and was willing to deceive and hurt others in order to get them—including hurting his family. He had a form of religion—an awareness of God—but didn’t follow him. In fact, he worshiped many gods. He did appeal to the true God when it was convenient, as he said earlier to Jacob, “I’ve been blessed by Yahweh because of you” (Gen 30:27). Laban was a manipulator. He made promises to Jacob throughout their relationship and continually backed out of them. He manipulated and attempted to control Jacob by promises and threats.

The world does the same with us. It will offer us blessings, like wealth, popularity, or promotion, if we’ll follow and turn away from God. If not, it will threaten us, whether by harassment, the loss of riches or opportunities for it, imprisonment, death, etc. As an example, Satan offered Christ the world if he would only bow down and worship him. When he didn’t, Satan used the world to put Christ on the cross. Judas betrayed Christ for money. Demas deserted Paul because of love for the world. Like Laban, the world continually seeks to keep us away from doing God’s will, and it uses blessings or threats to do so.

Consider the following verses: Romans 12:2 says,

Do not be conformed to this present world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may test and approve what is the will of God—what is good and well-pleasing and perfect.

The world aims to press and mold us into its image. When we conform—through adopting its language, thought-processes, and practices—the less we are able to test and approve God’s will. Not only will we be unable to follow God, we won’t even be able to discern his will.

Second Corinthians 6:14-18 says,

Do not become partners with those who do not believe, for what partnership is there between righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship does light have with darkness? And what agreement does Christ have with Beliar? Or what does a believer share in common with an unbeliever? ... Therefore “come out from their midst, and be separate,” says the Lord, “and touch no unclean thing, and I will welcome you, and I will be a father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters,” says the All-Powerful Lord.

Paul speaks to the Corinthians and calls for them to separate from the world and not partner with it. If they obeyed this, God would welcome them and be a father to them. Since the Corinthian church was already believers, this referred to intimacy, answered prayer, and God’s blessing. Many believers are missing God’s best because of their partnership with a system and people who hate God. The entertainment they listen to and watch teaches sexual immorality and ungodliness. The people they admire, fellowship with, and aim to model, do the same. Because of these worldly partnerships and their negative influence, many believers lack intimacy with God, their Father.

If we are going to follow God, we must be careful of worldly influences—whether they come from friends, family, or employers, like Laban. We must be in the world but not of it. We must minister to it and yet be separate from it. Many fail to faithfully follow God because of the world’s negative influence—whether it be from the world’s promises of blessings or curses.

Are you separating from the world or partnering with it? Are you influencing the world or being conformed to it?

Application Question: In what ways does the world promise blessings if we conform to it and curses if we don’t? How can we be in the world and positively influence it, and yet practice a healthy separation from it? How have you experienced stagnation in your spiritual life because of enjoying the world and its promises instead of God and his promises?

To Faithfully Follow God, We Must Trust Him

…So now, come, let’s make a formal agreement, you and I, and it will be proof that we have made peace.” So Jacob took a stone and set it up as a memorial pillar. Then he said to his relatives, “Gather stones.” So they brought stones and put them in a pile. They ate there by the pile of stones. Laban called it Jegar Sahadutha, but Jacob called it Galeed. Laban said, “This pile of stones is a witness of our agreement today.” That is why it was called Galeed. It was also called Mizpah because he said, “May the Lord watch between us when we are out of sight of one another. If you mistreat my daughters or if you take wives besides my daughters, although no one else is with us, realize that God is witness to your actions.” “Here is this pile of stones and this pillar I have set up between me and you,” Laban said to Jacob. “This pile of stones and the pillar are reminders that I will not pass beyond this pile to come to harm you and that you will not pass beyond this pile and this pillar to come to harm me. May the God of Abraham and the god of Nahor, the gods of their father, judge between us.” Jacob took an oath by the God whom his father Isaac feared. Then Jacob offered a sacrifice on the mountain and invited his relatives to eat the meal. They ate the meal and spent the night on the mountain. Early in the morning Laban kissed his grandchildren and his daughters goodbye and blessed them. Then Laban left and returned home.

Genesis 31:30-55

After Laban tracked down Jacob, he confronted him, saying he wanted to throw a party and kiss his daughters and children goodbye—probably not true—and that Jacob acted foolishly (v. 27-28). He later says, “Why did you take my gods?” (v. 30). Jacob, unaware that Rachel stole them, foolishly declared that whoever had them would die. Laban searches everything Jacob had—all of his tents and yet found nothing. When he reaches Rachel, who is sitting on her camel, she asks for permission to not stand because it was her time of month. Laban doesn’t distrust her—probably because he assumes that she would never sit on the family’s deities, which would have been, to them, blasphemous.

When Laban couldn’t find his gods, Jacob challenges him in front of their relatives (v. 36-42). Twenty years of frustrations came out of his mouth. Laban had changed his wages ten times. Every time a lamb was taken, Laban charged Jacob for it. Jacob worked day and night, in hot and cold, to care for Laban’s flocks, and the only reason Laban hadn’t hurt Jacob was out of fear of Isaac and Isaac’s God.

After a mutual sharing of complaints, Laban requests a nonaggression agreement (v. 44). Jacob gathers stones together as witnesses of this agreement. He names them “Galeed,” which in Hebrew means “the heap of witness.” Laban named it “Jegar-sahadutha,” which in Aramaic means the same (v. 47). The stone memorial was also called “Mizpah,” which means “watchpost” (v. 49).⁵ There Laban swore to the God of Abraham and the god of Nahor, and Jacob swore to the God whom Isaac feared—the true God (v. 53).

By swearing, Jacob promised to not mistreat Laban’s daughters or take other wives. He also promised to never return to Haran and try to harm Laban. Laban promised the same. If either one of them broke these promises, it was believed that the deities they swore by would judge them. After their oaths, they ate together, which, in the East, represented a binding agreement.

Laban’s oath was superstitious, as he believed in many gods, but Jacob’s was based on true faith in Yahweh, God. In Genesis 28, at Bethel, God promised to be with him, bless him, and bring him back to the land. God was faithful and had protected Jacob. When Jacob acted hastily and left Laban, God warned Laban in his sleep to not harm him. Jacob had seen God’s faithfulness and believed that God would continue to be faithful. God would be with Jacob, protect him, and curse those who mistreated him (cf. Rom 12:19). Therefore, Jacob’s memorial was an act of faith in God.

Similarly, if we are going to follow God, we must trust his promises. He will protect us; he will be with us; he will bless us; he will use everything, including bad things, for our good. The very reason many of us aren’t faithfully following God is because we don’t trust him. We don’t trust that he has good plans for us. Eve sinned against God because she doubted his goodness. We often do the same.

If we are going to faithfully follow God along life’s winding road, we must settle in our hearts to trust him. Trusting him starts with receiving Christ as our Lord and Savior (Rom 10:9-10). Because God loves us, he sent Christ to live on this earth and die for us to pay the penalty for our sins. All of us have sinned against God and because of that we deserve death (Rom 3:23, 6:23). However, God paid the penalty, so we can have a relationship with him and spend eternity with him (John 17:3). When we accept Christ as our Lord, we become God’s children (John 1:12). God promises that he will never leave us nor forsake us (Matt 28:20) and that he will use all our circumstances, even bad ones, for our good—to make us into Christ’s image (Rom 8:28-29). God has good plans for his children, but we have to trust and follow him. Psalm 37:3-5 says,

Trust in the Lord and do what is right! Settle in the land and maintain your integrity! Then you will take delight in the Lord, and he will answer your prayers. Commit your future to the Lord! Trust in him, and he will act on your behalf.

When we trust God, he will act on our behalf. Faith is the key to unlocking all of God’s promises including salvation, having our needs met, and being used by him. Have you followed Christ as your Lord? Are you willing to follow him wherever he leads? If so, God will act on your behalf and use you for his purposes. If we don’t trust God fully, we will miss God’s best and will be prone to sin and rebellion.

Application Question: In what areas do you struggle with trusting God most and why? How can we grow in our faith, so that we trust God more?

To Faithfully Follow God, We Must Live at Peace with Others

So now, come, let’s make a formal agreement, you and I, and it will be proof that we have made peace.”

Genesis 31:44

It must be noticed that God does not allow Jacob to return to Canaan without making things right with Laban. After the pact, they weren’t best friends, but at least, there was mutual respect and an agreement to not harm each other. In the next chapters, God opens the door for Jacob to reconcile with Esau, who Jacob swindled out of his birthright twenty years earlier.

Similarly, if we are going to faithfully follow God, we must reconcile our relationships as well. This is emphasized throughout the New Testament. In Matthew 5:23-24, Christ taught that if while offering a gift to God, we recognize that somebody has something against us, we should leave the gift, reconcile, and then offer the gift to God. In Matthew 6:15, Christ taught that if we didn’t forgive others, God would not forgive us. In 1 Peter 3:7, Peter cautioned husbands to be considerate of their wives, lest their prayers be hindered.

Our horizontal relationships affect our vertical relationship. If we are out of fellowship with others, we will not be in right fellowship with God, and vice versa. Romans 12:11 says, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all people.” We can’t change people’s hearts, but we can do our part to live at peace, even if that means being separate from one another as Jacob and Laban chose to do.

What relationship is God calling you to reconcile, so you can faithfully follow him?

Application Question: In what ways have you experienced discord with others hindering your relationship with God? Are there any relationships God is calling you to reconcile?

Conclusion

In Genesis 31, Jacob follows God’s call to leave Haran for the promised land. Like his grandfather Abraham, he takes a step of faith. Leaving wasn’t easy, but it was God’s will for his life. As we consider this, it teaches us principles about how we can faithfully follow God—despite our circumstances.

1. To Faithfully Follow God, We Must Discern God’s Will
2. To Faithfully Follow God, We Must Be Careful of Fear
3. To Faithfully Follow God, We Must Be Careful of the World’s Influence
4. To Faithfully Follow God, We Must Trust Him
5. To Faithfully Follow God, We Must Live at Peace with Others

Copyright © 2018 Gregory Brown

Unless otherwise noted, the primary Scriptures used are taken from the NET Bible ® copyright © 1996-2016 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. All rights reserved.

Holy Bible, New International Version ®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Scripture quotations marked (ESV) are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®) Copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, Copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

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¹ Boice, J. M. (1998). Genesis: an expositional commentary (p. 803). Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books.

² Pink, Arthur W.. Gleanings in Genesis (p. 333). Neeland Media LLC. Kindle Edition.

³ Preacher’s Outline and Sermon Bible - Commentary - The Preacher’s Outline & Sermon Bible – Genesis II.

⁴ Steven Cole’s sermon on Genesis 31, Accessed 4/27/2018, from https://bible.org/seriespage/lesson-57-between-rock-and-hard-place-genesis-3117-55

⁵ Hughes, R. K. (2004). Genesis: beginning and blessing (p. 395). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

During the night Jacob quickly took his two wives, his two female servants, and his eleven sons and crossed the ford of the Jabbok. He took them and sent them across the stream along with all his possessions. So Jacob was left alone. Then a man wrestled with him until daybreak. When the man saw that he could not defeat Jacob, he struck the socket of his hip so the socket of Jacob’s hip was dislocated while he wrestled with him. Then the man said, “Let me go, for the dawn is breaking.” “I will not let you go,” Jacob replied, “unless you bless me.” The man asked him, “What is your name?” He answered, “Jacob.” “No longer will your name be Jacob,” the man told him, “but Israel, because you have fought with God and with men and have prevailed.” Then Jacob asked, “Please tell me your name.” “Why do you ask my name?” the man replied. Then he blessed Jacob there. So Jacob named the place Peniel, explaining, “Certainly I have seen God face to face and have survived.” The sun rose over him as he crossed over Penuel, but he was limping because of his hip. That is why to this day the Israelites do not eat the sinew which is attached to the socket of the hip, because he struck the socket of Jacob’s hip near the attached sinew.

Genesis 32:22-32 (NET)

What is God’s purpose in our trials and struggles?

In this context, Jacob is experiencing many difficulties. After working for his uncle Laban for twenty years, he flees in the middle of the night with his family and possessions. Laban was a difficult employer and relative. He deceived Jacob many times. After Jacob left with his family, Laban caught up to him with a small band, probably, planning to harm Jacob. However, God warned Laban in a dream to not speak anything good or bad to Jacob. After meeting, Jacob and Laban made a nonaggression pact—to not harm one another (Gen 31).

Right after this pact, Genesis 32:1-2 says that a large army of angels met with Jacob. Jacob calls the place Mahanaim, which means two camps. There were probably two angelic armies. God sent them, no doubt, to encourage and strengthen Jacob. But, they were also there to show Jacob that God had protected him and his family and was going to continue to protect him.

Probably motivated from his encounter with God’s angels, Jacob decides to reconcile a twenty-year, broken relationship with Esau, his brother. Previously, Jacob had swindled Esau out of his birthright, and in response, Esau wanted to kill him. It was that fractured relationship that initially prompted Jacob to seek refuge with Laban in Haran and to find a wife. After contacting Esau and seeking favor with him, Esau responds by coming to meet Jacob with four hundred men on horses. Jacob, probably, rightly assumes Esau is still angry and wants to take his life.

Jacob sends three caravans of gifts before him to try to appease Esau. Then in this text, after a night of no sleep, he sends his family across the Jabbok river. Because of the powerful rushing waters, this would have been very dangerous to do at night; however, having one more barrier between Esau and his family seemed less dangerous.

After sending them across the river, Jacob stays on the other side—probably to pray and spend time with God. Then while alone, he is attacked by a man in the middle of the night. This man is God, in angelic form, wrestling with Jacob (cf. Hos 12:3-4, Gen 32:30). Sometimes this text is taught with a focus on us wrestling with God in prayer. However, it must be noticed in verse 24 that the man wrestled with Jacob and not vice versa. Initially, God was seeking something from Jacob, and then towards the end of the night, after Jacob was, essentially, defeated when his hip was dislocated, Jacob seeks a blessing from the man.

What is happening in this text? First, it must be noticed that this bares some similarities with how God appeared as a man at other times in Scripture. With Abraham, who was a pilgrim from Ur dwelling in Canaan, God appeared as a pilgrim and went to his house (Gen 18). With Joshua, who was Israel’s general, God appeared as a soldier (Josh 5:13-15). And here, with Jacob, whose name means “heel-grabber,” who had tried to trip people up like a wrestler throughout his life (i.e. his brother, father, and uncle), God appeared as a wrestler. As Jacob had previously tried to wrestle things from others, God wanted something from Jacob. Throughout his life, God had always been wrestling with Jacob—seeking his submission, obedience, and trust. Psalm 18:26 says, “You prove to be reliable to one who is blameless, but you prove to be deceptive to one who is perverse.” Since Jacob was a wrestler by nature, God met Jacob as one.¹

In this specific circumstance, as Jacob anticipates an encounter with murderous Esau, it seems that God’s wrestling with Jacob was symbolic of what was happening in the natural world (cf. 32:28 and 33:4). Previously, God showed Jacob how, in the spiritual world, angels were protecting him in his encounter with Laban (Gen 32:1-2). But now God is showing him that though he is in turmoil, awaiting murderous Esau, it was God who was actually allowing the turmoil in his life. Through the circumstances, God was wrestling with Jacob to bring changes in his life. The same is true with us. We may never physically see God or his angels working behind our circumstances, but they are there. God particularly uses trials and struggles for transformative purposes in our lives (Heb 12:7).

One person said, “God whispers to us in our pleasures but shouts at us in our trials.” A.W. Tozer said, “The Lord cannot fully bless a man until He has first conquered him.”² F. B. Meyer said,

This is life; a long wrestle against the love of God, which longs to make us royal. As the years go on, we begin to cling where once we struggled; and as the morn of heaven breaks, we catch glimpses of the Angel-face of love…³

Therefore, as we consider God’s wrestling with Jacob, we learn principles about God’s purposes in trials and how we should respond to them. Jacob had a struggle with Esau, but behind this struggle was a struggle with God, who was seeking to transform Jacob’s life.

Big Question: What principles can we learn about God’s purposes in our trials and how we should respond to them?

God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Focus on Him

During the night Jacob quickly took his two wives, his two female servants, and his eleven sons and crossed the ford of the Jabbok. He took them and sent them across the stream along with all his possessions. So Jacob was left alone. Then a man wrestled with him until daybreak.

Genesis 32:22-24

Though the NET says Jacob “quickly took his wives,” the NIV says Jacob “got up” and the ESV says he “arose.” It seems that Jacob had already gone to bed but couldn’t sleep. He sends his family and possessions across the river but stays by himself, most likely to think or pray.

Jacob oversaw a large camp of people. In fact, in his earlier prayer, he calls it “two camps” (Gen 32:10). He had two wives, twelve children, and enough flocks to spare over 550 of them as gifts to Esau. There was always plenty of work, plans, and decisions to be made, which was good. However, it probably had a tendency to crowd out God and prayer. It was when Jacob was intentionally alone that he could really focus on God, which was probably one of God’s purposes in the trial.

This is also true with us. Busyness and life circumstances tend to hinder our time with God. It is often through trials that God encourages us to separate from the crowd and busyness to focus on him. Again, as mentioned, it seems this wrestling was symbolic of what was happening in the natural world. Behind Jacob’s trial with Esau was God’s wrestling with Jacob. God wanted to do something in Jacob’s life through this trial, but in order to do it, God had to get him alone and appear to him in a dramatic way.

Sadly, many of us spend our time focusing on “Esau” in our trial by being consumed with people or circumstances, and therefore, missing God’s hand in it. We miss his “reaching” out to us, as he reached out to Jacob. If we are going to respond well to our trials, we must see God in them and his desire to draw us to himself and for us to intentionally choose to focus on him. Our trials are not accidental or haphazard, but part of God’s sovereign plan to make us into his image (cf. Eph 1:11, Rom 8:28-29). We must focus on him—through prayer, studying his Word, and obedience. God desires to change us and if we need to go through a trial to draw our focus to him, then he is willing to allow one. In this circumstance, God had Jacob all alone, and it was time to do work in his life. God desires to get us alone and bring change in us as well.

Are you drawing near God in the midst of your trial? Are you seeking his face? Is the discipline of solitude—being alone with God—a regular part of your life? Don’t let busyness choke out your time with God. When we do that, sometimes a trial is the only way for God to get our attention and our obedience. Psalm 46:10 (NIV) says, “Be still and know that I am God.”

Application Question: Why is it so easy to let busyness crowd God out of our lives? How has God used trials to help you focus on him more? How do you practice the discipline of solitude—daily getting alone with God? How is God calling you to grow in this discipline?

God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Develop Perseverance

So Jacob was left alone. Then a man wrestled with him until daybreak.

Genesis 22:34

After the man grabs Jacob, they wrestle till day break. This is a phenomenal task. How did Jacob last so long? Wrestling is grueling. Six minutes of intense wrestling will wear most people out. But Jacob wrestles all night—maybe for six or seven hours. This is a greater workload than running a marathon, which for most takes four to five hours—elite runners can do it in two. From this alone, we can tell that God provided a special grace for Jacob to continue throughout the night. But then, we must ask the question, “Why did God provide grace for Jacob to wrestle so long? Also, we must ask, “If God’s primary purpose was to defeat Jacob, why did he not just end it quickly?” We know the man was powerful enough to do this. When it nears daybreak, the man simply touches Jacob’s hip and it dislocates. Some versions say it shrank. He could have won at any time. Why does he wrestle with Jacob all night and potentially provide grace so it could continue?

It seems one of the purposes was to teach Jacob perseverance—though he, no doubt, felt like quitting. Similarly, God allowed Jacob to go through twenty years of a difficult relationship with Laban. He was tricked and cheated many times. God could have ended that trial at any time, but he waited twenty years to do so. Of course, there were many things God was doing through Jacob’s trial with Laban, and there were many things God was doing as he wrestled with Jacob throughout the night. But one of the main things God was doing was developing perseverance in him.

God often does the same thing with us. He provides grace for us to continue under difficult circumstances and ends the situation at the proper time. He does this to teach us perseverance. Consider the following verses:

And let endurance have its perfect effect, so that you will be perfect and complete, not deficient in anything.

James 1:4

Not only this, but we also rejoice in sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance, character, and character, hope.

Romans 5:3-4

God uses endurance or perseverance to complete us—meaning to make us mature. When we persevere—meaning to bear up under a heavy weight—it develops our character and helps us trust in God.

This happens in parenting all the time. A parent puts a child into a sport or club, but when the child encounters difficulty, he immediately wants to quit. If the parent allows the child to quit, quitting will often become part of his character. When circumstances get tough, he will want to quit relationships, jobs, hobbies, etc., throughout his life. He may never develop perseverance. But wise parents understand the benefit of perseverance. If the child continues, even though he emotionally wants to quit, he will develop the ability to persevere in the various difficulties of life—in the work force, marriage, parenting, church, etc.

God isn’t trying to develop spoiled children who want to quit every time they go through something hard. He is trying to develop mature children who not only can persevere but also can help others persevere through the difficulties of life. He develops ministers from his trials.

Are you persevering in your trial? Often like David, we have to pray, “Renew a steadfast spirit within me” (Psalm 51:10 NASB). Lord, help us to stand, even when we feel like quitting!

Application Question: Why is perseverance such an important virtue to develop? In what ways is God calling you to persevere in your current season? What are some disciplines that help with developing a “steadfast spirit” while going through trials (Ps 51:10)?

God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Recognize Our Weakness and Need for Him

When the man saw that he could not defeat Jacob, he struck the socket of his hip so the socket of Jacob’s hip was dislocated while he wrestled with him. Then the man said, “Let me go, for the dawn is breaking.” “I will not let you go,” Jacob replied, “unless you bless me.” …

Genesis 32:25-26

While Jacob and the man wrestled, Jacob would not give up. Therefore, God touched Jacob’s hip and dislocated it. In wrestling, the hips and legs are where the strength is. That’s why wrestlers typically have very muscular lower bodies. When the hip was dislocated, the fight was over. Jacob lost.

God often does this with us as well. It is often our strengths that keep us away from God and obedience to him. We feel competent for our work load, relationships, future, etc.—therefore, we are not as dependent upon God as we should be, if at all. So God often has to touch our strengths—our places of confidence—to help us depend on him. For some, he touches their intelligence, others their body, others their finances, others their family or friendships. Wherever our pride, strength, and focus are, outside of God, God often touches it, so we see our weakness.

To the Church of Laodicea, God said:

‘I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either cold or hot! So because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I am going to vomit you out of my mouth! Because you say, “I am rich and have acquired great wealth, and need nothing,” but do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind, and naked

Revelation 3:15-17

The church had wealth, thought they were right before God, and that they didn’t need anything. This created a spiritual lukewarmness—they weren’t passionate about God at all. However, God said they were really “wretched, pitiful, poor, blind, and naked” (3:17). They didn’t know how weak they were, so God was going to “vomit” them out of his mouth (3:16)—which probably referred to some type of judgment or trial. The trial was going to show them how weak they really were and how they needed God.

Often God does the same to us. He has to touch us, and sometimes injure us, so we know our weakness. Previously, we didn’t feel like we needed to read God’s Word, go to church or small group, pray, or serve, but after our trial, we realize that we need God desperately. That’s what God was doing to Jacob.

In fact, from this point on, Jacob was no longer wrestling, all he could do was cling to the man and not let go. All he could do was hold onto God—he barely had enough strength with one leg to hold himself up. God does the same to us. Through trials and the pain experienced in them, he helps us cling to him.

With Paul, God allowed him to experience a demonic thorn in the flesh which made him weak. We don’t know exactly what it was, but most believe it was a sickness. When Paul asked for God to remove it, God replied, “My grace is enough for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Cor 12:9). As Paul was weak, he also began to cling to God more and therefore experience power in his weakness. In response to this, Paul said,

So then, I will boast most gladly about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may reside in me. Therefore I am content with weaknesses, with insults, with troubles, with persecutions and difficulties for the sake of Christ, for whenever I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Corinthians 12:9b-10

In our trials, God often touches our perceived strength, so we can know our true weakness and cling to God’s power. Where are your strengths outside of God located? How have you experienced God’s touch and therefore the revealing of your weakness?

Application Question: What are your areas of strength which you have a tendency to neglect God in or because of? In what ways have you experienced God touching your strength, so that you cling more dearly to him and experience his power?

God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Grow in Prayer

Then the man said, “Let me go, for the dawn is breaking.” “I will not let you go,” Jacob replied, “unless you bless me.” …

Genesis 32:26

As mentioned, at this point, Jacob is no longer wrestling in his strength, he is simply clinging to God in weakness. While doing this, Jacob begins to pray. The man says, “Let me go,” but Jacob replies, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.” This sounds like a command, but it really wasn’t. Jacob had lost. He was defeated. Hosea 12:3-4, while summarizing Jacob’s life, describes Jacob’s request this way: “In the womb he attacked his brother; in his manly vigor he struggled with God. He struggled with an angel and prevailed; he wept and begged for his favor. He found God at Bethel, and there he spoke with him!”

Jacob weeps and begs for this man’s favor. He is in pain and at this man’s mercy. He cries out, “No, I won’t let you go. Please bless me.” We don’t know at what point Jacob discerned he was wrestling with God. Maybe, he knew immediately, but if not, he certainly knew when the man easily dislocated his hip. Later, he calls the place Peniel because he had seen God’s face and survived (v. 30).

Jacob was not a man of prayer. Jacob’s narrative begins in Genesis 25; however, we never see him pray until Genesis 32. When he hears that Esau is coming to meet him with 400 men, he prays. He claims God’s promises of prospering him and making his descendants numerous (v. 9-12). Again, he prays as he wrestles with God (v. 26). Jacob prays twice in this one chapter. He humbly begs the Lord with tears for a blessing.

Throughout Jacob’s narrative, desiring God’s blessing has been his greatest attribute. The problem is he always sought it the wrong way. He swindled his brother and deceived his father for it. When he married—a crucial part of his receiving Abraham’s blessing—he married two women instead of one, which wasn’t part of God’s perfect will for his life. Of course, his circumstances were not ideal, as Laban deceived him; however, that was no excuse to accept the deception and live in sin. Jacob desired God’s blessing but always sought it the wrong way. But now, God was training him through trials how to receive the blessing properly—it was through laboring in prayer. When Esau was going to receive the blessing instead of him, he should have prayed. When Laban tricked him by giving him Leah, he should have prayed. Prayer was the missing ingredient in his life. God was aiming to correct that through this trial.

In the same way, God often trains us to labor in prayer through our trials. Before experiencing trials, we spent little time in prayer. We prayed at meals and before bed, but we rarely, if at all, isolated ourselves to spend quality time in prayer. Through weakening and breaking Jacob, God was training him to become a man of prayer and not just of action.

Are you daily drawing near the Lord in prayer? Are you allowing trials to help you seek God’s blessing—his deliverance, his empowerment, and his direction?

Application Question: Why do most people struggle with their prayer lives and being faithful in it? What are some strategies that might help people pray more often and better? How is God calling you to cling to God in prayer and seek his blessing? What blessings are you currently seeking God for?

God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Recognize and Confess Our Sin

The man asked him, “What is your name?” He answered, “Jacob.”

Genesis 32:27

After Jacob asked for a blessing, the man replies, “What is your name?” Obviously, God knew the answer to that, since he is omniscient. When God asks a question in Scripture, it is not to gain information. It is typically for the other’s benefit and realization. When God asked Adam if he ate from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, it was not because God didn’t know the answer. It was because he wanted Adam to recognize his sin and confess it.

When Jacob answered by sharing his name, it was meant to help Jacob realize, he had lived out his name. He had been deceitfully wrestling with people his whole life. His name meant “deceiver” or “heel grabber.” It has a wrestling connotation to it. He deceived his brother, father, and uncle. God was using the trial to help Jacob see his sin and be free from it.

When Jacob answered God with his name, in his heart, it appears to have been a form of confession. He was saying:

I have been a deceiver. When my father asked who I was, I said, “Esau.” I deceived him. When you told me to leave Laban, I didn’t trust you. I deceived Laban by quickly leaving in the middle of the night. Laban’s and Esau’s seeking to harm me is all my fault. I have been a Jacob. Forgive me and please bless me.

It’s the same for us. God often uses trials to help us recognize our failures and repent of them. In Deuteronomy 8:2 (NIV), Moses said the reason God led Israel into the wilderness was to reveal what was in their hearts—to see if they would obey God. He said, “Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the wilderness these forty years, to humble and test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands.”

What does our response in trials say about our hearts? Do we run away from God or to him in our trials? Do we run to some addiction, idol, or sin before God—a relationship, work, alcohol, lying, complaining, or self-pity?

We tend to think of our enemies as our circumstances or certain people. However, our biggest enemy is our hearts—their love for sin and lack of trust in God. Therefore, by God’s grace, he allows trials to reveal the sin in our hearts, so we can repent of it. First John 1:9 says, “But if we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous, forgiving us our sins and cleansing us from all unrighteousness.”

Are you confessing your sin in the midst of your trial, or are you clinging to it instead of God? Are you fighting with God—holding on to your independence and self-reliance—instead of laying everything down to cling to him?

Application Question: If our sinful tendencies typically show up in trials (lying, complaining, addictions, love for the world, lack of trust in God, etc.), what sinful tendencies of yours often show up in the midst of trials? Are there specific ones that you are struggling to fully repent of?

God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is to Change Our Character

“No longer will your name be Jacob,” the man told him, “but Israel, because you have fought with God and with men and have prevailed.”

Genesis 32:28

After Jacob told God his name, God renamed him “Israel.” Naming represented at least two things in that culture: ownership and a change of character or destiny. Sometimes kings would rename their subjects. For example, Daniel and his three Hebrew friends were all given Babylonian names when they became subjects of Babylon. Jacob, who commonly lived for himself, was now, even more so, going to live for God. In fact, many translate the name “Israel” as “God rules,” “God commands,” “God prevails,” or “God strives.” Those who prefer this translation say every time the name of God is coupled with a verb, God is always the subject.⁴ For example, Daniel means “God judges” not “he judges God,” and Samuel means “God heard” not “he heard God.” Others translate “Israel” as “strives with God” or “prevails with God.” They would take this meaning by how the narrator explains the naming. Jacob had fought with God and men and prevailed (v. 28). Others translate it “Prince of God.”

How did Jacob prevail with God? Certainly, he didn’t win the battle. By the end of it, his hip was dislocated, and he was clinging to the angel. In fact, after Jacob named the site Peniel, he said he had seen God’s face and “survived” (v. 30). He barely survived—he was not the victor. Therefore, in what way, did Jacob prevail with God? In this way, previously, Jacob operated in his strength—deceiving and manipulating people and situations—but, with the angel, he succeeded in receiving the blessing, as he cried out in his weakness and prayer. This would be the increased means by which Jacob would achieve victory in the future. When the narrator talked about “prevailing with men,” this was about his future. God would deliver Jacob from Esau (33:4). By weakness and prayer, Jacob found success.

Jacob’s battle and renaming marked a character change in Jacob. He would still, at times, operate in his flesh by depending on his fleshly wisdom instead of God’s. However, depending on God would begin to identify him more.

In the same way, that is what God aims to achieve through our trials. He wants to change us more into his image. Again, Romans 5:3-4 says we rejoice in tribulation because it produces perseverance and then character. Our character changes as we learn perseverance in our trials, patience with people, love for the unlovable, and trust in God, rather than doubting him. God doesn’t waste our trials but uses them to the best end.

Application Question: How have you grown in character, as you’ve experienced past trials? What aspects of your character do you believe God is working on now through the trials or difficulties you’re experiencing?

God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Know God Better

Then Jacob asked, “Please tell me your name.” “Why do you ask my name?” the man replied.

Genesis 32:29

After being renamed, Jacob politely asked to know the man’s name. But the man simply replied, “Why do you ask my name?” Why does the man not answer Jacob? The reason seems to be that Jacob already knew who he was. Jacob knew the man was God and that is why he named the place Peniel—”face of God” (v. 30).

Similarly, one of God’s primary purposes in trials is to help us know him more by revealing different characteristics of himself. In Genesis 12, when Abraham was called to leave his home and family, God revealed himself as Yahweh—the covenant God. In leaving his home and family, he would learn that God was faithful—he was a God of covenant. In Genesis 17, when God told Abraham he was going to have a child in his old age, God’s name was El Shaddai. He was the all-powerful God—the one who does miracles. Likewise, God revealed himself as Yahweh to Jacob at Bethel when he first left his father’s house. Yahweh protected him from Laban and was protecting him now from Esau. Jacob knew his name and was experiencing the covenant God in a more intimate way, as he wrestled with him and received his blessing.

In the same way, when we go through trials, one of God’s purposes is for us to know him more—to know his name and character, to know that he is faithful, loving, just, merciful, and all-powerful.

Application Question: What aspect(s) of God’s character has he been revealing to you recently through Scripture or your trials?

God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is to Bless Us

Then Jacob asked, “Please tell me your name.” “Why do you ask my name?” the man replied. Then he blessed Jacob there.

Genesis 32:29

After renaming Jacob, the man blesses him. We don’t know exactly what this entailed. Most likely, the angel restated the promises of Abraham and Isaac over him, just as God had done at Bethel (Gen 28). God was going to make him into a great people and prosper him. Certainly, this blessing also included protection, as was needed in his current situation with Esau.

Similarly, God’s purpose in our trials is to bless us. This means not only changing our character and allowing us to know God more, but also much more. With Joseph, after losing his family and experiencing slavery and imprisonment, God exalted him to second-in-command over Egypt, where he could save many people including his family. With Job, after he lost his family, health, and career, ultimately God restored double of all he lost. With Daniel, who was taken away from his home and family to Babylon, God favored him and placed him in government positions to bless the nations.

Through being faithful in trials, God promises that he will expand our ministry to others, as he did with Joseph and Daniel. In 2 Corinthians 1:3-5, Paul said:

Blessed is the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles so that we may be able to comfort those experiencing any trouble with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For just as the sufferings of Christ overflow toward us, so also our comfort through Christ overflows to you.

In our trials, as we seek the Lord, we experience his comfort, so we can in turn comfort others with it. It has often been said that our misery often becomes our ministry. We minister out of our sufferings and the comfort received during them.

If we’re faithful in our sufferings, God not only blesses us with an expanded ministry, but also promises to bless us richly in heaven. Consider the following verses:

Happy is the one who endures testing, because when he has proven to be genuine, he will receive the crown of life that God promised to those who love him.

James 1:12

Blessed are you when people insult you and persecute you and say all kinds of evil things about you falsely on account of me. Rejoice and be glad because your reward is great in heaven, for they persecuted the prophets before you in the same way.

Matthew 5:11-12

God promises eternal rewards as we faithfully endure trials. We must remember that God has good plans for us, even though it may seem hard to believe when encountering difficulties. Through Christ’s sufferings, he paid the penalty for our sins, so that anyone who trusts in him can be saved (John 3:16). He was also made perfect through his sufferings, so he could have an eternal ministry as our high priest—sympathizing with our weaknesses, praying for us, and giving grace in our time of need (cf. Heb 2:10, 4:15-16, 7:25). He also has been given a name, which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus, every knee would bow and every tongue confess that Jesus is Lord (Phil 2:6-11). God’s plan is to bless those who faithfully suffer.

Are you trusting that God has good plans for you in your suffering? We need to realize this if we are going to stand. Those who hope in the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up on the wings of eagles, run and not grow weary, and walk and not faint (Isaiah 40:31). We must trust that God’s ultimate plan is to bless us and not hurt us.

Application Question: In what ways have you experienced God’s blessing after faithfully going through a trial? How can we, in faith, hold on to this truth while suffering?

God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Become Better Witnesses

So Jacob named the place Peniel, explaining, “Certainly I have seen God face to face and have survived.” The sun rose over him as he crossed over Penuel, but he was limping because of his hip. That is why to this day the Israelites do not eat the sinew which is attached to the socket of the hip, because he struck the socket of Jacob’s hip near the attached sinew.

Genesis 32:30-32

After this experience, Jacob named the place Peniel, which means “face of God.”⁵ Since his limp continued after this experience, Israelites chose to not eat the meat around the hip, in remembrance of Jacob’s encounter with God. This is still observed by some orthodox Jews today.

What this implies is that Jacob shared this experience. He shared it with his wives, children, and servants. It was passed down by the Jews, first through oral history and then through Scripture. He shared his wrestling experience at Peniel with others. His injury and the place it happened were both memorials of God’s work.

Similarly, though trials may be hard, discouraging, and, at times, shameful, they are not our stories to keep to ourselves. They are God’s stories of how he protected us, challenged us, helped us grow, and even used our wounds for his glory. We must share them with others, so God receives honor. Also, it is by sharing them with others that we receive full healing and often process exactly what God has done in our lives. James 5:16 says, “So confess your sins to one another and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great effectiveness.”

Sadly, many never share their stories and therefore never experience God’s grace. They don’t experience God’s healing, don’t allow God to heal others through them, and therefore, rob God of his glory.

Don’t keep your trials to yourself! Share them with others. Allow God to heal you, heal others, and glorify himself. Psalm 107:2 (NIV) says, “Let the redeemed of the Lord tell their story.”

Application Question: Why do people often not share their testimonies with others? How can we grow in transparency in order to receive healing, help others heal, and give glory to God?

Conclusion

As we consider God’s wrestling with Jacob, it was a picture of his current trial with Esau. Often, we only see our natural circumstances and forget there is a spiritual reality that oversees them. In this story, God pulls back the curtain: Jacob’s struggle was not only with Esau, it was also with God and with himself. God wanted to change Jacob through his difficulties. God had always been wrestling with Jacob, seeking to get his will done in his life. Similarly, God has always been lovingly wrestling with us, seeking our submission to his will and kingdom.

What is God’s purpose in our trials and struggles?

1. God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Focus on Him
2. God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Develop Perseverance
3. God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Recognize Our Weakness and Need for Him
4. God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Grow in Prayer
5. God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Recognize and Confess Our Sin
6. God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is to Change Our Character
7. God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Know God Better
8. God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is to Bless Us
9. God’s Purpose in Our Trials Is for Us to Become Better Witnesses

Copyright © 2018 Gregory Brown

Unless otherwise noted, the primary Scriptures used are taken from the NET Bible ® copyright © 1996-2016 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. All rights reserved.

Holy Bible, New International Version ®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Scripture quotations marked (ESV) are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®) Copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, Copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked (NASB) are taken from the New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, and 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

Scripture quotations marked (KJV) are from the King James Version of the Bible.

All emphases in Scripture quotations have been added.

BTG Publishing all rights reserved.

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¹ Wiersbe, W. W. (1997). Be authentic (p. 58). Colorado Springs, CO: Chariot Victor Pub.

² Wiersbe, W. W. (1997). Be authentic (p. 58). Colorado Springs, CO: Chariot Victor Pub.

³ Meyer, F.B.. Jacob: Wrestling with God (Kindle Locations 1082-1084). Kindle Edition.

⁴ Boice, J. M. (1998). Genesis: an expositional commentary (pp. 819–820). Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books.

⁵ Accessed 5/9/2018 from https://www.biblestudytools.com/dictionary/peniel/

Now Dinah, Leah’s daughter whom she bore to Jacob, went to meet the young women of the land. When Shechem son of Hamor the Hivite, who ruled that area, saw her, he grabbed her, forced himself on her, and sexually assaulted her. Then he became very attached to Dinah, Jacob’s daughter. He fell in love with the young woman and spoke romantically to her. Shechem said to his father Hamor, “Acquire this young girl as my wife.” When Jacob heard that Shechem had violated his daughter Dinah, his sons were with the livestock in the field. So Jacob remained silent until they came in. Then Shechem’s father Hamor went to speak with Jacob about Dinah. Now Jacob’s sons had come in from the field when they heard the news. They were offended and very angry because Shechem had disgraced Israel by sexually assaulting Jacob’s daughter, a crime that should not be committed. But Hamor made this appeal to them: “My son Shechem is in love with your daughter. Please give her to him as his wife. Intermarry with us. Let us marry your daughters, and take our daughters as wives for yourselves. You may live among us, and the land will be open to you. Live in it, travel freely in it, and acquire property in it.” Then Shechem said to Dinah’s father and brothers, “Let me find favor in your sight, and whatever you require of me I’ll give. You can make the bride price and the gift I must bring very expensive, and I’ll give whatever you ask of me. Just give me the young woman as my wife!” Jacob’s sons answered Shechem and his father Hamor deceitfully when they spoke because Shechem had violated their sister Dinah. They said to them, “We cannot give our sister to a man who is not circumcised, for it would be a disgrace to us. We will give you our consent on this one condition: You must become like us by circumcising all your males. Then we will give you our daughters to marry, and we will take your daughters as wives for ourselves, and we will live among you and become one people. But if you do not agree to our terms by being circumcised, then we will take our sister and depart.” Their offer pleased Hamor and his son Shechem. The young man did not delay in doing what they asked because he wanted Jacob’s daughter Dinah badly. (Now he was more important than anyone in his father’s household.) So Hamor and his son Shechem went to the gate of their city and spoke to the men of their city, “These men are at peace with us. So let them live in the land and travel freely in it, for the land is wide enough for them. We will take their daughters for wives, and we will give them our daughters to marry. Only on this one condition will these men consent to live with us and become one people: They demand that every male among us be circumcised just as they are circumcised. If we do so, won’t their livestock, their property, and all their animals become ours? So let’s consent to their demand, so they will live among us.” All the men who assembled at the city gate agreed with Hamor and his son Shechem. Every male who assembled at the city gate was circumcised. In three days, when they were still in pain, two of Jacob’s sons, Simeon and Levi, Dinah’s brothers, each took his sword and went to the unsuspecting city and slaughtered every male. They killed Hamor and his son Shechem with the sword, took Dinah from Shechem’s house, and left. Jacob’s sons killed them and looted the city because their sister had been violated. They took their flocks, herds, and donkeys, as well as everything in the city and in the surrounding fields. They captured as plunder all their wealth, all their little ones, and their wives, including everything in the houses…

Genesis 34 (NET)

What are consequences of neglecting God?

Genesis 34 is one of the more tragic chapters in the Bible. In the narrative, Jacob’s only daughter Dinah was raped by a prince in the land of Shechem. After the assault, the young man (also named Shechem) realized that he loved Dinah and sent his father to arrange a marriage between the families. Jacob’s sons agreed on the condition that the men of Shechem circumcise themselves. Because of the potential to gain great wealth through the partnership, the men of the town agreed and went through with the procedure. On the third day after their circumcision, when the pain probably was the worst, two of Jacob’s sons murdered all the men in the town.

The story is tragic. Many might question, “Why is this story in the Bible?” and “What can we learn from it?” There are many things: For one, stories like this give evidence of the Divine authorship of Scripture. From a human perspective, adding this story makes no sense. If Moses, the author of Genesis, was simply trying to encourage Israel before they entered the promised land, this story would have been left out, as it displays the Jews in an unflattering light. Even the Canaanites look more righteous than Israel in this story. Human authors would not have added this story. But, since God is the ultimate author of Scripture, he doesn’t hide the flaws of his people. David had flaws. Moses had flaws. Abraham had flaws. Jacob had flaws, and the Israelites had flaws. In fact, this demonstrates that all are sinners—Jews and Gentiles. However, God can change flawed people and use them for his purposes, which he eventually does with Israel. In one sense, this chapter should give us all hope.

In addition, not only does this story demonstrate the Divine authorship of Scripture, but also shows us what happens when God is neglected. In the previous narrative, Jacob had worked for his uncle Laban for twenty years, and while working for him, he was cheated and abused. When Jacob fled from Laban, God rescued him. After God resolved that situation, Jacob sought reconciliation with his brother Esau; however, Esau responded with bringing 400 men to meet him. His response appears to be hostile. However, God delivered Jacob from that situation as well—bringing reconciliation.

After a long period of time living in the land of Succoth, Jacob finally brought his family to the land of Shechem in Genesis 33. While there, Jacob built an altar—declaring that the God of Israel was God (Gen 33:20). For twenty years of hostile service in Haran, God protected and prospered Jacob. When he was about to encounter his angry brother, God protected him again. But now in Shechem, Jacob was threatened by a much more difficult problem—ease and prosperity. Though his major struggles seemed to be over, his most difficult struggle appeared—maintaining faith in ease and prosperity. This is why Scripture says we should rejoice in various trials and tribulations, as they test our faith (Jam 1:2). It is much harder to be faithful to God in ease than in difficulty. And it appears that Jacob and his family began to neglect God in this season.

How can we tell that Jacob and his family neglected God?

In Genesis 35, after this terrible narrative, Jacob led his family in repentance. Consider what he says to his household and all who were with him, “Get rid of the foreign gods you have among you. Purify yourselves and change your clothes” (v. 2). While in Shechem and living in prosperity, his family had started worshiping pagan gods. In fact, Josephus, a Jewish historian, said that Dinah went into the city, not only to see the ladies, but also to go to a pagan festival.¹ It appears that while neglecting God, Jacob’s family began to conform to the world and worship the idols of the world. This is exactly how Paul describes the pagan world in Romans 1:21-23:

For although they knew God, they did not glorify him as God or give him thanks, but they became futile in their thoughts and their senseless hearts were darkened. Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for an image resembling mortal human beings or birds or four-footed animals or reptiles.

When the world denies the knowledge of God, as seen in creation or Scripture, people naturally find something to worship, even if it’s themselves. Humanity was made to worship God, and if we don’t worship him, we will worship something else. We don’t just see this in the world around us, but we see this in ourselves, as believers. When we’re neglecting God, he is replaced by some idol—something that gets most of our attention: social media, video games, career, money, relationships, etc.

In Romans 1:28, Paul adds: “And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what should not be done.” When people neglect God, their thinking becomes depraved—leading to depraved actions. That’s just what we see in this chapter—the consequences of neglecting God, both among pagans and believers.

Something else that may imply the neglect of God in this narrative is the fact that this is one of the few chapters in the Bible where God is never mentioned.² In the book of Esther, God is never mentioned either, but his sovereign and positive influence is seen throughout the pages. In Genesis 34, though God is not mentioned, we know he is present, but he seems to be present for judgment. He is handing people over to a “depraved mind” as they’ve neglected him—allowing them to commit sin and reap the terrible consequences of it.

This is the tragic story of society, as we see these consequences happening all around us and often in our own lives. In this story, a pagan rapes Dinah, and in return, the Israelites deceive and kill all the men in the city—committing a worse sin. Sadly, that often happens in our world as well, when believers neglect God. They neglect God—leading to being conformed to the world and often committing worse sins than the world, impacting society negatively. Though redeemed, believers still have a sinful nature that must be subdued by living in the Spirit (Gal 5:16-22).

As we study this narrative, we must be sober and aware that these unfortunate consequences of neglecting God can happen in our nations, communities, churches, and homes. Let us consider them and be warned, which, no doubt, is the narrator’s purpose in sharing this story.

Big Question: What are the consequences of neglecting God, as demonstrated in the Genesis 34 narrative?

Now Dinah, Leah’s daughter whom she bore to Jacob, went to meet the young women of the land. When Shechem son of Hamor the Hivite, who ruled that area, saw her, he grabbed her, forced himself on her, and sexually assaulted her. Then he became very attached to Dinah, Jacob’s daughter. He fell in love with the young woman and spoke romantically to her. Shechem said to his father Hamor, “Acquire this young girl as my wife.” When Jacob heard that Shechem had violated his daughter Dinah, his sons were with the livestock in the field. So Jacob remained silent until they came in. Then Shechem’s father Hamor went to speak with Jacob about Dinah. Now Jacob’s sons had come in from the field when they heard the news. They were offended and very angry because Shechem had disgraced Israel by sexually assaulting Jacob’s daughter, a crime that should not be committed. But Hamor made this appeal to them: “My son Shechem is in love with your daughter. Please give her to him as his wife. Intermarry with us. Let us marry your daughters, and take our daughters as wives for yourselves. You may live among us, and the land will be open to you. Live in it, travel freely in it, and acquire property in it.” Then Shechem said to Dinah’s father and brothers, “Let me find favor in your sight, and whatever you require of me I’ll give. You can make the bride price and the gift I must bring very expensive, and I’ll give whatever you ask of me. Just give me the young woman as my wife!”

Genesis 34:1-12

As the story begins, Dinah, Jacob’s only daughter, goes to the city to meet with the young ladies of the land and is raped by Shechem, the prince of the land. Most likely, Dinah was around fourteen to sixteen years old. In the ancient world, it was known that unaccompanied ladies were vulnerable to being assaulted by men. Henry Morris says, “Unattached young women were considered fair game in cities of the time, in which promiscuity was not only common but, in fact, a part of the very religious system itself.”³ This was particularly true of the Canaanites, who were corrupt and known for their sexual immorality (cf. Lev 18). Unaccompanied women were often violently taken by the leaders of the land. This happened twice with Abraham, as his wife was taken into Pharaoh’s and Abimelech’s harems (12:15; 20:2). Both times, aware of this tragic cultural reality, Abraham lied and said that she was his sister to protect himself from being killed because of her. Isaac, Jacob’s father, also lied about his wife, afraid someone would take her and kill him (Genesis 26:7). Why Dinah’s father or brothers are not with her is unclear.

But to further demonstrate the gravity of the gross immorality in Shechem, when Hamor, the prince’s father, approached Jacob about Dinah marrying his son, he doesn’t apologize or even mention the issue. It was as if it wasn’t a big deal. Maybe, Hamor thought, “Oh, boys will be boys!” This shows how acceptable the rape of a young lady was. In the ancient world, sexual immorality was a part of religious worship—people would have all types of gross sex to please the gods and seek prosperity. Therefore, sex wasn’t special, and it wasn’t necessarily to be preserved for one’s spouse—especially if one was a man.

This is what happens in a society that disregards God. In Romans 1:24-27, Paul describes this:

Therefore God gave them over in the desires of their hearts to impurity, to dishonor their bodies among themselves…For this reason God gave them over to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged the natural sexual relations for unnatural ones, and likewise the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed in their passions for one another. Men committed shameless acts with men and received in themselves the due penalty for their error.

Sexual immorality and homosexuality are results of denying God. When God is denied, sexual immorality saturates society. We see this happening all around us. Sex is emphasized on TV, movies, music, and the Internet. It is used to sell all types of products. Pornography is one of the biggest industries in the world. Sex trafficking is a growing illegal industry. In the US, one out of six females are victims of an attempted or completed rape.⁴ Similarly, one out of four females on college campuses experience sexual assault.⁵ In addition, the acceptance of homosexuality has grown. It is commonly promoted on the TV, news, college campuses, and city parades. Even polygamy, having multiple marriage partners, is growing in acceptability. When God is neglected in a society, sexual immorality saturates it.

But this is not just a problem for society, it is also a problem for believers. When we are neglecting God, we will often find ourselves struggling with lustful thoughts and images—consequently, making us more prone to fall into sexual actions. In Genesis 38, Judah, Jacob’s son, will visit a prostitute. David, the king of Israel, will not only have many wives and concubines, but will also commit adultery (2 Sam 11). When God is neglected in our lives, often, lust will rear its ugly head in some form or another. We must be careful of this.

Because of this danger, Paul said, “Flee sexual immorality! ‘Every sin a person commits is outside of the body’—but the immoral person sins against his own body” (1 Cor 6:18). It’s so dangerous, we must run from it. Turn off the TV! Cut off the Internet! End the relationship! We must be zealous and brutal to stay pure in a world that is being increasingly sexualized.

Are you guarding yourself and others against sexual immorality?

Application Question: In what ways have you seen or experienced the growing promotion and acceptance of sexual immorality in society? How should Christians protect their minds and bodies from this very present danger?

When God Is Neglected, Parents Neglect Their Children

Now Dinah, Leah’s daughter whom she bore to Jacob, went to meet the young women of the land… When Jacob heard that Shechem had violated his daughter Dinah, his sons were with the livestock in the field. So Jacob remained silent until they came in… Jacob’s sons answered Shechem and his father Hamor deceitfully when they spoke because Shechem had violated their sister Dinah. They said to them, “We cannot give our sister to a man who is not circumcised, for it would be a disgrace to us. We will give you our consent on this one condition: You must become like us by circumcising all your males. Then we will give you our daughters to marry, and we will take your daughters as wives for ourselves, and we will live among you and become one people. But if you do not agree to our terms by being circumcised, then we will take our sister and depart.”

Genesis 34:1, 5, 13-17

In this narrative, one of the sad realities is the lack of parental involvement and leadership. As mentioned, it was common and accepted in that society for unaccompanied females to be sexually assaulted. In some areas, even unaccompanied men might be raped (cf. Gen 19, Judges 19)! Why was Jacob’s teenage daughter even allowed to go to the city by herself? Where were the parental boundaries?

In addition to this, after the rape, Jacob is quiet and uninvolved. He doesn’t charge Shechem with wrong and doesn’t even get involved with the negotiation. He allows his sons to handle it. To make this even worse, it is clear from the narrative that Dinah wasn’t at home with Jacob but was being held captive by this family (Gen 34:26). When his sons agreed to intermarry with the Hivites on the condition of circumcision, Jacob doesn’t say, “No.” This was a major spiritual failure on Jacob’s part. To intermarry with the Canaanites would have threatened God’s promise. Abraham wouldn’t allow Isaac to marry a Canaanite. Isaac wouldn’t allow Jacob to marry a Canaanite. This would have led to compromise and the Israelites further adopting the sins of that culture. Jacob fails his children practically and spiritually. Why was he so uninvolved?

With Dinah, Jacob is probably quiet because she wasn’t his priority. This is sad to say, but Jacob was known for playing favorites. He favored Rachel’s children over Leah’s. Also, because sons were favored over daughters during that period of time, Dinah might have been his least favorite. She was a child of Leah, and she wasn’t a boy. Maybe, Jacob doesn’t say anything because he knows that he is responsible. He didn’t protect her by loving her and establishing appropriate boundaries for her. This was a sad situation.

However, this situation is very common when God is neglected. When God is neglected, parents neglect their responsibilities to their children. (1) They don’t establish appropriate boundaries for them. Many of our kids are exposed to things they shouldn’t be exposed to on the Internet, TV, video games, books, music, etc. Many parents set no appropriate boundaries, which allows the enemy to tempt and influence them negatively. Some parents even say things like, “Well, I don’t want to shelter my kids and protect them from the world!” In Romans 16:19, Paul said, “But I want you to be wise in what is good and innocent in what is evil.” We should prepare our children for the world by teaching them the truth about sin, what they will encounter in the world, and how they should respond. If we don’t do that, the world will expose them in a negative way—it will be done in a way that promotes evil and lures them into sin, instead of away from it. We must train our children to be wise and at the same time innocent. The world only plans to corrupt them and take away their innocence.

(2) In a society where people neglect God, not only will parents neglect their responsibilities by not setting appropriate boundaries, but they also will tend to not discipline their children at all. Often disciplining children will be looked down upon, as if left alone, children will naturally blossom into maturity and wisdom. Proverbs 22:15 says, “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him.” Proverbs 19:18 (GNT) says, “Discipline your children while they are young enough to learn. If you don’t, you are helping them destroy themselves.” Without appropriate discipline, children will grow up wild and rebellious. When there is no discipline in the home, the children will disrespect and rebel against the parents. This leads to children disrespecting teachers, bosses, government leaders, and even God—creating increased dishonesty, crime, and anarchy in society.

Why do parents neglect their children, other than the fact they’re neglecting God? Some neglect their children simply because they were neglected as children, and therefore, they don’t know how to properly parent. Their father or mother wasn’t around or involved for whatever reasons. The sins of the parents show up in the children’s lives and therefore are repeated (cf. Ex 20:5). Another common reason parents neglect their children is simply for career purposes. In order to have a higher standard of living, kids are handed off to schools, coaches, and tutors for training. Often these people don’t have any Christian values at all. When a worldly environment gets our children for eight or more hours a day (especially if we include television, music, etc.), then the one or two hours a day with parents and one hour of church on Sunday won’t be very influential.

In this narrative, Jacob didn’t only fail Dinah, he also failed his sons, who committed unjust murders. They were right to seek justice; however, murdering a whole village of men for the sins of one was hardly just. Since Jacob did nothing, his sons reacted. Finally, when Jacob rebukes his sons, he only focuses on what they did to “him” (v. 30)—not God or others.

When God is neglected in a society or a home, parents typically neglect their responsibilities—to the demise of their children.

Application Question: In what ways have you witnessed this growing trend of parents neglecting their children by not loving them, disciplining them, and setting boundaries for them? Why is this happening? How should it be remedied?

When God Is Neglected, Religion Is Abused

Jacob’s sons answered Shechem and his father Hamor deceitfully when they spoke because Shechem had violated their sister Dinah. They said to them, “We cannot give our sister to a man who is not circumcised, for it would be a disgrace to us. We will give you our consent on this one condition: You must become like us by circumcising all your males. Then we will give you our daughters to marry, and we will take your daughters as wives for ourselves, and we will live among you and become one people. But if you do not agree to our terms by being circumcised, then we will take our sister and depart.”

Genesis 34:13-17

In response to Hamor’s and Shechem’s offer, Jacob’s sons said that it would be disgraceful for Dinah to marry someone uncircumcised. Therefore, they promised to give consent if all the males of the city became circumcised. If they did that, then the two tribes could intermarry.

It is clear that Jacob’s sons had no plan to intermarry with these people. This deal was deceptive. But what makes this deception even worse is the fact that they used their sign of faith to secure the deal. In Genesis 17, God called Abraham to circumcise himself and the males in his household as a sign of faith. This was to be a perpetual sign of their covenant with God for generations. Therefore, by asking the men to circumcise themselves—they were asking them to participate in Israel’s religion. Most likely, they further explained the symbolic nature of circumcision. This is what made their act even more evil.

This is also common when God is neglected in our world today; religion becomes abused for selfish and evil reasons. (1) Sometimes religion is used for financial gain. In 1 Timothy 6:5, Paul warned Timothy about those who used godliness as “a way of making a profit.” Many churches and Christian organizations are just money-making businesses. Profit has eroded their sense of mission and integrity. (2) Religion is also used to control and abuse people—as often seen in cults. In 2 Timothy 3:5-6 (NIV), Paul describes abusive spiritual leaders:

having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people. They are the kind who worm their way into homes and gain control over gullible women, who are loaded down with sins and are swayed by all kinds of evil desires

With this abuse of religion, many will fall away from the church in droves. The false teaching, hunger for power and money, and manipulation of people will drive many away.

(3) Religion is also abused when it primarily focuses on people securing their “passions,” like lust or wealth, instead of holiness. In 2 Timothy 4:2-4 (ESV), Paul warns Timothy of this:

Preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching. For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths.

Not only will the leaders neglect God and abuse the people, but also the people won’t want God and his Word. Religion will be used primarily to comfort people in sin and even encourage it, instead of to warn and challenge them to holiness. Congregations will find teachers who make them feel good by preaching myths. When God is neglected, the abuse of religion will be comprehensive—developing many false believers and false teachers.

When God was neglected in Shechem, religion was used for personal gain. The men agreed to circumcision, not because of faith, but to gain the wealth of Israel (v. 20-24). Religion was also abused for vengeance. Jacob’s sons murdered the men of the city after they were circumcised. Sadly, when God is neglected, religion will be abused—leading to tragic results in our societies as well.

Application Question: How have you seen or experienced the abuse of religion in the church and society in general? How should true believers seek to remain faithful in times like these?

When God Is Neglected, Violence Increases

In three days, when they were still in pain, two of Jacob’s sons, Simeon and Levi, Dinah’s brothers, each took his sword and went to the unsuspecting city and slaughtered every male. They killed Hamor and his son Shechem with the sword, took Dinah from Shechem’s house, and left. Jacob’s sons killed them and looted the city because their sister had been violated. They took their flocks, herds, and donkeys, as well as everything in the city and in the surrounding fields. They captured as plunder all their wealth, all their little ones, and their wives, including everything in the houses.

Genesis 34:25-29

While the Hivites were in pain from their circumcision, two of Jacob’s son’s, Simeon and Levi, murdered all the men of the village. Most likely, they had some servants help with this slaughter. After the murder, they also plundered the city and surrounding fields—taking the wealth, children, and women.

This is also common in society and church when God is neglected. Romans 1:28-32 says:

And just as they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what should not be done. They are filled with every kind of unrighteousness, wickedness, covetousness, malice. They are rife with envy, murder, strife, deceit, hostility. They are gossips, slanderers, haters of God, insolent, arrogant, boastful, contrivers of all sorts of evil, disobedient to parents, senseless, covenant-breakers, heartless, ruthless. Although they fully know God’s righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but also approve of those who practice them.

Paul says when people don’t acknowledge God, it leads to murder, hostility, insolence, ruthlessness, and even approval of such evils. Sadly, we live in societies where abortions happen more than live births. People declare the rights of parents to murder their children. Generations are being wiped out because of inconvenience. When Paul says “heartless” (Rom 1:31), it can also be translated “without natural affection” (KJV). It is normal for parents to love their children. However, when people neglect God, abortions become common place because love comes from God. Self-love is the default of our flesh, and when someone gets in the way of our comfort—hurting them is acceptable.

In a society where God is neglected, senseless violence becomes common—suicide, the murder of innocents in schools and businesses, genocide, war, etc. Even our entertainment will be violent, as people apart from God love violence. The video games, movies, and music will be filled with it. Artists who sing about their abuse of women, drug selling, and gang banging will go platinum and get movie deals. As the entertainment world promotes violence, our young people will become even more violent.

This is the world we live in, and sadly, these acts of violence will at times be seen amongst the church. When James writes the Hebrew Christians who were scattered because of persecution, he rebukes them for murdering one another. James 4:1-3 says,

Where do the conflicts and where do the quarrels among you come from? Is it not from this, from your passions that battle inside you? You desire and you do not have; you murder and envy and you cannot obtain; you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask; you ask and do not receive because you ask wrongly, so you can spend it on your passions.

Hatred and anger are seeds of murder; therefore, when Christians allow those emotions to foster, they lead to acts of violence. Husbands beat their wives. Children fight with their parents, and church members continually hurt one another—behaving worse than pagans. The sins of Jacob’s children did not draw pagans to God; it only further pushed them away. Like Paul said, “the name of God is being blasphemed among the Gentiles because of you’’ (Rom 2:24). The people of Israel were no better than the world around them. In fact, they were probably worse.

Sadly, in many places, Christians don’t have great testimonies either. Instead of returning good for evil (Rom 12:21), they return eye for eye and tooth for tooth. Sometimes like Jacob’s sons, they go even farther than that—returning face for tooth and body for finger. Instead of justice, they seek vengeance—turning many away from Christ.

Application Question: How have you seen or experienced violence increasing in the world? Why is it so prevalent? In what ways have you seen or experienced it in the church?

When God Is Neglected, He Brings Discipline to Help Us Repent

In Genesis 35:1-3, we see that God uses this difficult event to turn Jacob and his family back to God. It says:

Then God said to Jacob, “Go up at once to Bethel and live there. Make an altar there to God, who appeared to you when you fled from your brother Esau.” So Jacob told his household and all who were with him, “Get rid of the foreign gods you have among you. Purify yourselves and change your clothes. Let us go up at once to Bethel. Then I will make an altar there to God, who responded to me in my time of distress and has been with me wherever I went.”

Often God has to do the same with us. He will use tragedy in a person’s life, family, or nation to draw people to repentance. Hebrews 12:5-6 and verse 8 says,

And have you forgotten the exhortation addressed to you as sons? “My son, do not scorn the Lord’s discipline or give up when he corrects you. For the Lord disciplines the one he loves and chastises every son he accepts.” … But if you do not experience discipline, something all sons have shared in, then you are illegitimate and are not sons.

In what ways is God drawing you back to himself through discipline? God loves us too much to allow us to continue to neglect him and go our own way. When Jonah ran from God, God brought a storm in his life to turn him back (Jonah 1). When David committed adultery and murder, Scripture says God’s hand was heavy upon him until he repented (Psalm 32:3-5 ESV). When the Corinthian church was abusing the Lord’s Supper, God disciplined some with sickness, depression, and even death (1 Cor 11:28-30). God loved them too much to allow them to continue in sin.

God does the same with us. He uses discipline to help us repent and turn back to him. If we are without discipline, we are not true children of God.

Application Question: In what ways have you experienced strong discipline, including the consequences of sin, which turned you from sin back to God? How do you see God’s discipline operating in the church and society?

Application

Application Question: In understanding the consequences of neglecting God, how should we respond?

1. We must be careful of times of ease and prosperity.

It wasn’t when things were bad that Jacob’s family neglected God and committed treacherous acts; it was when things were good. It was after God delivered them from Laban and Esau. It was when they were prosperous and admired by others that they neglected God (cf. Gen 35:2)—leading to great sins. In the same way, when things are good, we tend to neglect God and fall into sin as well. Be careful of those times.

2. We must be spiritually disciplined.

A major fall away from God doesn’t happen at once. It happens gradually. It happens as we stop attending church faithfully, reading our Bibles, praying, and having Christian fellowship. Soon we find ourselves far away from God and his people, and doing things we never thought we would do again or worse. To stop this gradual fall, we must be faithful and disciplined. We must practice regular spiritual disciplines, have accountability, and put God first before everything.

3. We must be hopeful because God is greater than our broken situations.

Though God is never mentioned in this terrible narrative—hope in him is implied. God eventually takes this blasphemous and murderous family and makes them the twelve tribes of Israel. They become the authors and stewards of God’s Word. They build the tabernacle and temple and become witnesses to the pagan world. Jesus said salvation comes from the Jews (John 4:22). God eventually uses these people greatly, and God can do the same with us. He can turn around our lives, churches, and nations. He can bring light out of darkness and beauty out of ugliness. He can take our thorns and make them our greatest boasts (2 Cor 12:7-9). Therefore, as we consider our dark and desperate situations, we must be hopeful. Our God is greater! Thank you, Lord.

Conclusion

After God delivers Jacob and his family from Laban and Esau and they arrive safely in Canaan, it seems they neglected God. In Genesis 35, we see that the family picked up many idols while dwelling in Canaan. God stopped being their priority and there were terrible consequences because of this. In addition, the Hivites, who were pagans, were already experiencing the results of not acknowledging the true God. Sadly, many of these consequences can be seen in our societies, churches, and individual lives. What are consequences of neglecting God? It is important to know them, so we can repent of them.

1. When God Is Neglected, Sexual Immorality Saturates Society
2. When God Is Neglected, Parents Neglect Their Children
3. When God Is Neglected, Religion Is Abused
4. When God Is Neglected, Violence Increases
5. When God Is Neglected, He Brings Discipline to Help Us Repent

Copyright © 2018 Gregory Brown

Unless otherwise noted, the primary Scriptures used are taken from the NET Bible ® copyright © 1996-2016 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. All rights reserved.

Holy Bible, New International Version ®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Scripture quotations marked (ESV) are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®) Copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, Copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked (NASB) are taken from the New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, and 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

Scripture quotations marked (KJV) are from the King James Version of the Bible.

All emphases in Scripture quotations have been added.

BTG Publishing all rights reserved.

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¹ Bruce Goettsche’s sermon from Genesis 34, “When God Is Absent,” accessed 5/25/2018 from http://www.unionchurch.com/archive/101099.html

² Guzik, D. (2013). Genesis (Ge 35:1). Santa Barbara, CA: David Guzik.

³ Guzik, D. (2013). Genesis (Ge 34:1–4). Santa Barbara, CA: David Guzik.

⁴ Accessed 5/25/2018 from https://www.rainn.org/statistics/victims-sexual-violence

⁵ Accessed 5/25/2018 from https://www.huffingtonpost.com/brian-earp/1-in-4-women-how-the-late_b_8191448.html

Leading a small group using the Bible Teacher’s Guide can be done in various ways. One format is the “study group” model, where each member prepares and shares in the teaching. This appendix will cover tips for facilitating a weekly study group.

1. Each week the members of the study group read through a selected chapter of the guide, answer the reflection questions (see Appendix 2), and come prepared to share in the group.
2. Prior to each meeting, a different member is selected to lead the group and share his answer to Question 1 of the reflection questions, which is a short summary of the chapter read. This section of the gathering could last from five to fifteen minutes. This way, each member can develop his ability to teach and will be motivated to study harder during the week. Or, each week the same person could share the summary.
3. After the summary has been given, the leader for that week facilitates discussion of the remaining reflection questions and selected questions from the chapter.
4. After discussion, the group shares prayer requests and members pray for one another.

The strength of the study group is that the members are required to prepare their responses before the meeting, allowing for easier discussion. Another is that each member has the opportunity to further develop his ministry skills through teaching. These are distinct advantages.

Copyright © 2018 Gregory Brown

BTG Publishing all rights reserved.