What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you think of spiritual growth? Some picture a solitary individual meditating or praying. While that concept accurately portrays one aspect of Christian spirituality, it doesn’t tell the whole story.

Three Aspects of Transformation

The issue of spiritual transformation is not new in the Christian faith. It has been a primary issue, though perhaps given different labels, throughout church history. From the time the Spirit of God descended upon the believers in Jerusalem, God has been transforming the souls of individual believers in the context of local Christian communities.

Preaching has never been and never will be the only element needed for the transformation of Christians into Christ’s image. Nor are small-group Bible studies, personal Bible study, Sunday school classes, or even one-on-one discipleship sufficient for growing Christians when they focus solely on communicating biblical information. Therefore, a movement has grown that emphasizes formation of the believer’s inner and outer life and not just transformation of the intellect. Three broad approaches to spiritual transformation have developed.

Fellowship Model

One approach is to create fellowship opportunities. Churches develop structured settings for members to build relationships with others. They may launch small groups that meet in homes. They may convert their Sunday school classes into times of social engagement. These groups enable believers to be intimately involved in one another’s lives. The fellowship model focuses on corporate prayer for one another, growth of interpersonal intimacy, and support for each other in times of need. This approach effectively connects believers within a church body.

Spiritual Disciplines Model

A second approach emphasizes disciplines such as meditation, prayer, fasting, and solitude. Such writers as Dallas Willard and Richard Foster have done excellent work on spiritual disciplines. This approach takes seriously the inner life and intimacy with God. However, when used in isolation, this approach can make people think spiritual transformation is a private matter. Even though the spiritual disciplines include communal elements (worship, service, and fellowship), some people treat the private exercises (silent retreats, journaling, meditating on Scripture, prayer, and fasting) as primary. That’s a mistake.

Counseling Model

The third approach relies heavily on personal introspection. Christian counseling emphasizes areas of surrounding sin or personal character flaws that cause interpersonal problems or destructive behavior. Counseling seeks to understand the roots of such problems by looking at one’s heritage and temperament. Usually in one-on-one interaction, the counselor probes for the root issues hidden beneath the surface problem. Discovering these deeper issues can shed light on a person’s consistent failure to make wise choices. This approach focuses on identifying and dealing with those internal obstacles that prevent spiritual growth. Dealing with the issues is a key component in spiritual transformation.

The Transforming Life Model—An Integrated Approach

The three approaches are all valuable, but when taken alone they each have weaknesses. The fellowship model can fail to guide believers toward growth. The spiritual disciplines model can neglect to emphasize authentic and intimate Christian community, which is necessary for growth. The counseling model can fail to value the role that spiritual disciplines can have in growth. It also risks focusing on deficiencies so much that the person never benefits from the resources of God’s grace. It can focus too intently upon the person’s sin and failure and not enough on God’s enabling power toward growth in holiness.

Therefore, Transforming Life brings in elements from all three approaches. The series tries to balance the inward and outward elements of transformation. Its theme is:

Experiencing divine power through relationships;
Striving together toward maturity in Christ.

We believe a particular context is essential to the transformation process. That context is authentic community in which people come to trust each other. Though one-on-one relationships can be effective, we believe that multiple relationships are more effective. While one individual can spur another toward growth, that one individual has limited gifts and abilities. Also, though we value the spiritual disciplines, we see them as means toward the end of complete transformation of the believer’s inner and outer life. Disciplines aren’t ends in themselves. Finally, we think believers need to seek greater understanding of sin’s dynamic in their lives. They need to see potential blind spots or obstacles to their spiritual well-being and learn to deal with the root issues beneath their areas of struggle.

Our working definition of the Christian’s transformation is:

The process by which God forms Christ’s character in believers by the ministry of the Spirit, in the context of community, and in accordance with biblical standards. This process involves the transformation of the whole person in thoughts, behaviors, and styles of relating with God and others. It results in a life of service to others and witness for Christ.

While the transformation process is an end in itself, the ultimate end is Christ’s glory. He is the One adored by those who experience His presence and are transformed by Him. They, in turn, seek to exalt Him in the world.

Because each person is unique, God’s formative process is unique for each. And though the Spirit of God is the One who transforms souls, each individual has personal responsibility in the process. Many spiritual disciplines can contribute, yet God is primarily concerned with transforming the whole person, not just patterns of behavior. For this reason, no one method (be it a traditional spiritual discipline or another method) is the single critical component.

A well-rounded experience of activities is the greatest catalyst for growth. For example, providing for the needy helps us better understand and participate in Christ’s love for the outcast, needy, lonely, and depressed. A small group offers the chance to encourage a struggling believer, learn from others how to apply God’s Word personally, and comfort someone in his or her grief. A regular time for prayer can help us reflect upon God’s intimate love, remember personal needs and the needs of others as they are brought before God, release anxieties to God, and express dependence upon God. Spiritual formation occurs neither exclusively in private nor exclusively in public. For the character of Christ to be developed most fully, believers need an inner, private intimacy with God; an active, working love for others; and a pursuit of Christlike integrity.

Transforming Life depends solely on peer leadership. Groups don’t need to be led by trained ministers. Leaders are more like facilitators—they don’t need to have all the answers because group members learn from each other. The leader’s role is to create an environment that fosters growth and encouragement.

Still, all small-group ministries need consistent coaching for the lay leaders. The group leaders need ministers and pastors to train and encourage them. A small-group ministry will raise all sorts of issues for leaders to deal with as people become honest about their lives in a trusting community. A group leader may need guidance about how to respond to a group member who shares that he has been having an e-mail “affair” and has not told his wife. Another leader may feel discouraged when group members drop out. Still another may wonder how to deal with two group members who are consistently angry with each other. It’s important to provide support to those who take the risk to develop such an authentic environment for growth.

The Four Themes of This Series

Instead of aiming for competency in a set of skills or techniques, this series helps people identify the areas that must be developed in a believer’s life. In other words, while it’s necessary for a believer to know the “how-tos” of the Christian life, it’s not sufficient. Knowing how to do personal Bible study and being good at sharing Christ with others are praiseworthy skills.

Developing these skills, however, is not the end goal but the means by which we live out who we are as new creatures in Christ. That’s why this series addresses four critical components of the Christian life: identity, community, integrity, and ministry.

This series proposes that the Christian life involves:

knowing your identity in Christ

so that

you can make yourself known to others in a Christian community

so that

you can pursue a lifetime of growth in the context of community

so that

you are best equipped to glorify Christ by serving others.

Identity

To understand our need for transformation, we must understand who we are currently, both as individuals and as members of the body of Christ. Who we are has undoubtedly been shaped by our past. Therefore, we explore various aspects of our identity, such as our heritage and temperament. What do these tell us about who we are and what we value? The interaction during this study bonds us and builds trust among us. Our goal is not to analyze, criticize, or control each other, but it is to grow and affirm what God is doing in and through one another.

In Identity, we ultimately want group members to see themselves in light of their identity in Christ. However, many of the values we actually live out stem from such influences as temperament, family background, and culture. Not all of those values are contrary to our new identity in Christ. For example, the value one person places on honesty, which he learned from his parents, is affirmed by his identity in Christ.

It can take a long time—more than a lifetime allows—for the Spirit of God to transform our values to line up with our new identity in Christ. We cooperate with the Spirit when we reflect on what our values are and how well they line up with our identity in Christ as described in Scripture.

One very significant characteristic of our identity in Christ is that we are part of the body of Christ. The Christian life cannot be lived in isolation.

Community

So, while talking about my place in Christ, I need to pay attention to our place in Christ as a community. Understanding our corporate identity in Christ is crucial for a healthy community transformation process. The Community study helps a group not only understand how a Christian community develops but also experience a growing sense of community.

In order to experience intimate community in the biblical sense, we must learn to reveal ourselves to others. We need to honestly, freely, and thoughtfully tell our stories. Our modern culture makes it easy for people to live isolated and anonymous lives. Because we and others move frequently, we may feel it’s not worth the effort to be vulnerable in short-lived relationships. However, we desperately need to keep intentionally investing in significant relationships.

Real involvement in others’ lives requires more than what the term fellowship has too often come to mean. Real involvement includes holding certain values in common and practicing a lifestyle we believe is noble, while appreciating that this lifestyle doesn’t make us perfect. Rather, this lifestyle is a commitment to let God continue to spiritually form us.

Community includes a group exercise, “Life Story,” that has been tremendously effective in building community and enhancing self-understanding. “Life Story” walks a person through the process of putting together a personal, creative presentation of the most formative relationships and experiences of his or her life. As people share their stories with each other, a deep level of trust and commitment grows.

Integrity

By the time a group has experienced Identity and Community together, members have built significant intimacy and trust. Now they’re ready to pursue a harder step. It’s the heart of our approach to spiritual transformation. Many believers greatly underestimate the necessity of intimacy and trust for successful growth in Christian holiness. But we must be able to share honestly those areas in which we need transformation. We can deal with deep issues of growth only in a community in which we’re deeply known by others. We need others who have our best interests at heart. They must also be people we trust to hold sensitive issues in genuine confidence.

Why does the pursuit of Christian holiness need to occur in community? There are at least two reasons. First, we need accountability in the areas of sin with which we struggle. When we confess our struggles to a group, we become accountable to all of the members to press on toward growth. Because the group is aware of our sin, we can’t hide it in darkness, where it retains a hold on our life and can make crippling guilt a permanent fixture in our walk. If we’re struggling, we have not one but several people to lean on. In addition, the corporate, or group, setting increases the likelihood of support from someone else who has struggled in the same way. In one-on-one accountability, one person may not be able to relate well to the other’s struggles. He or she may have different areas of struggle.

The second benefit of corporate pursuit of holiness is that without the encouragement and stimulus of other Christians, we’re often blind to the ways in which we need to grow. In the counsel of many who care for us, there can be greater wisdom. If some believers are blind to being hospitable, the hospitality of another believer can spur them on to develop that quality in their own lives. If some never think about how to speak encouraging words, the encouraging speech of another can become contagious.

Ministry

With Identity, Community, and Integrity as a foundation, believers are prepared to discern how God wants them to serve in the body of Christ. “Where can I serve?” is not an optional question; every believer should ask it. Nor is this a matter simply for individual reflection. Rather, we can best discern where and how to serve while in community with people who know our past, interests, struggles, and talents. The community can affirm what they see in us and may know of opportunities to serve that we’re unaware of.

How many terrific musicians are sitting in pews every Sunday because they lack the confidence to volunteer? Those gifted people might merely need others who know them well to encourage them to serve. Maybe someone’s life story revealed that while growing up she played in a band. Someone might ask, “What have you done with that interest lately?”

The Layout of Community

Each session has the following features:

•  Session Aims states a goal for you as an individual and one for the group.
•  Preparation tells what assignment(s) you need to complete ahead of time in order to get the most out of the group. For this study, much of the preparation will involve completing “Life Story” exercises. The “Life Story” exercises can be found on pages 61-96.
•  Introduction sets up the session’s topic.
•  Content provides material around which group discussions and exercises will focus. You should read the “Introduction” and “Content” sections before your group meeting so you’ll be prepared to discuss them.
•  Conclusion wraps up the session and sets the scene for the next one.
•  Assignment lists “homework” to complete before the next group meeting.

In this way, each session includes all three aspects of transformation: personal introspection, spiritual disciplines, and the experience of God in relationships. Through all of these means, the Spirit of God will be at work in your life.

Creating a community isn’t easy, but it’s worth it. To meet with a group, get to know the individuals, and acquire cognitive facts about them definitely helps you build community, but these components on their own don’t guarantee real community.

It’s also helpful to know certain principles that contribute to deep, rich community. This study will address some of those principles, but even knowing them isn’t enough. Something more is necessary, but it’s hard to obtain because it can’t be measured or quantified. This essential element is trust.

So the goal of this study is for group members to pursue new depths of trust with each other out of a common commitment to discovering God’s authorship in their own lives. Instead of just studying the concept of biblical community, your group will work through a tool called “Life Story” to build trust and establish community. As you work through “Life Story,” you will first examine your life and then present it to others as stories authored by God.

But first, what does it mean to say that God is the Author of your life?

Session Aims

Individual Aim: To recognize that each person’s life is a story authored by God.

Group Aim: To discuss God’s authorship of people’s lives and the responsibility individuals have for their own actions and choices.

Preparation

Read Session 1: God’s Authorship.

Read Life Story: Introduction beginning on page 61.

Read Life Story: Step A beginning on page 63.

Introduction

It’s been said that the most powerful words are “Once upon a time.” The listener immediately perks up and wants to hear what will follow. Whether fictional or historical, a well-told story has dramatic impact. Some of our most vivid memories of Scripture are stories: David and Goliath, Daniel and the lions’ den, Jesus walking on the water. Jesus understood the power of stories and used parables as one of His main methods of teaching. He used stories to communicate with His followers in a meaningful and life-changing way.

Stories can communicate meaning far more powerfully than most people realize. When people begin telling stories from their own life experience, you can sense the emotion in their voice. Often you can observe more excitement or intensity in their words when they tell personal stories. That’s why telling stories about experiences that have most influenced and shaped your life is a deeply personal exercise. Taken together, those most significant stories are “your story.” Do you realize that you have a story? Even more important, do you know that your story reflects the authorship of God?

Content

In order to genuinely be a part of a community, you must be able to tell your story. People must be exposed to your happenings and your heart. But in a Christian community, telling personal stories will always include, as a crucial component, your experience of God’s providence, salvation, and sanctification. To tell stories in this manner, you need to learn to observe what God has been doing in your life. The result will be an act of worship as you express and respond to expressions of God’s goodness and love.

This study’s fundamental exercise, “Life Story,” answers the question “How has God authored my story up to this point in my life?” This question immediately raises more questions:

•  How does God’s sovereignty fit with the freewill decisions that have shaped my past?
•  What does God’s authorship really mean?
•  Has God written a screenplay through which I must simply walk with little or no control over the outcome? Or am I a player on a stage with no script at all?

Though at times you might like to subscribe to one of the views suggested in the last question, neither scenario is accurate. Humans are inherently limited in their ability to understand how divine sovereignty and human responsibility (also known as predestination versus free will) fit together. So as you and your group review the events in your lives and speak of God authoring your stories, try to avoid blaming God for any painful or sinful actions of others or yourselves. On the other hand, don’t ignore God’s control of the events.

Consider the life of Joseph. He was able to rightly reconcile his brothers’ sinful actions—which really and negatively affected his life—with God’s control over his life. In Genesis 45:4-5 he said, “I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold into Egypt! And now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you.” And in Genesis 50:19-20 he said, “Don't be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.”

Regarding Joseph and his statements, theologian D. A. Carson comments,

He (Joseph) did not picture the event as wicked human machination into which God intervened to bring forth good. Nor did he imagine God’s intention had been to send him down there with a fine escort and a modern chariot but that unfortunately the brothers had mucked up the plan and so poor Joseph had to go down there as a slave. Rather, in one and the same event, God was operating and His intentions were good, and the brothers’ intentions were evil.

Scripture doesn’t try to explain how these conflicting intentions are compatible; it merely states that they are.

Perhaps no event displays this conundrum more than the death of Christ. Peter prayed this regarding the death of Christ: “Indeed Herod and Pontius Pilate met together with the Gentiles and the people of Israel in this city to conspire against your holy servant Jesus, whom you anointed. They did what your power and will had decided beforehand should happen” (Acts 4:27-28). In the same action, Herod, Pilate, the Romans, and the Jews committed the greatest miscarriage of justice in the history of the world. Yet this atrocious act fit with God’s plan. Again, Carson’s insight is helpful in highlighting the significance of this concept in our doctrine:

A moment’s reflection discloses that any other account of what happened would destroy Christianity. If the crucifixion of Jesus Christ is pictured solely in terms of the conspiracy of the local political authorities at the time, and not in terms of God’s plan (except perhaps that He decided at the last moment to use the death in a way He Himself had not foreseen), then this means the Cross was an accident of history. If it were an accident cleverly manipulated by God in His own interests, but not part of the divine plan, then the entire pattern of antecedent predictive revelation would be destroyed (including the Day of Atonement, the Passover lamb, the sacrificial system, and so forth). On the other hand if a person stresses God’s sovereignty in Jesus’ death, exulting that all the participants “did what your power and will had decided beforehand should happen” (4:28), while forgetting that it was a wicked conspiracy, then Herod, Pilate, Judas Iscariot, and the rest are exonerated of evil. If God’s sovereignty means that everyone under it is immune from charges of transgression, then there is no sin for which atonement is necessary. So why the Cross? Either way, the Cross is destroyed.

As you begin to explore your story in detail, you will face the same issue of human responsibility and God’s sovereignty. Inevitably, events in your life will seem inconsistent with God’s authorship. Sinful choices, others’ cruelty, rejection, disappointment, sickness, and even death mark everyone’s life. Exploring your life can turn into an exercise of bitterness if you blame God for such events and actions. You can also go astray or feel disillusioned if you label “good” those things that God would never call “good.” By faith, you must recognize that all of the events in your life are compatible with God’s sovereignty. Some of those events require faith that God is in control. The compatibility between your free will and God’s sovereignty will not always answer your questions. Instead, the mysterious compatibility of the two can cause you to recognize and accept both that God is in control over the world and that humans still exercise their own responsibility.

To reap the benefits of your story, you must believe in God’s power in all of life. As Paul explained to the Athenians, “The God who made the world and everything in it  .  .  .  he himself gives all men life and breath and everything else.  .  .  .  ‘For in him we live and move and have our being’” (Acts 17:24-25,28).

Conclusion

You can submit intellectually to the compatibility between human responsibility and God’s sovereignty, but that doesn’t always ease the emotions of grappling with the hard parts of your story. As you begin to think and pray through your life, ask God to use this exercise to strengthen your faith in Him as the Author of your story.

Assignment

Complete Life Story: Step A beginning on page 63.

Read Session 2: Experiences and Relationships.

Read Life Story: Step B beginning on page 73.

"Nothing ever seems to work out for me." Good things that happen to others never take place in my life." "I just don't find it possible to stick to anything and find it truly meaningful." Discouraging statements like these are spilled out to counselors without end. Few people seem to find purpose today. This writing is about this kind of struggle. And the same basic problem underlies most experiences that create such cries.

Commitment has been a matter of personal concern for years. I have been aware of its implications and importance, yet many things have puzzled me. I want to share some of the aspects of this variable that are now clearer to me.

Although I have felt commitment has paramount importance, I guess I had no idea so many people were committed to nothing—indeed had never even thought about being committed to something. I have asked many people in recent years to describe what was really important in their lives. To my amazement, many have been unable to answer, or if they do, they stumble around and give only vague responses (a common response is "to be happy"). Yet to be able to give a firm and clear answer to this question is absolutely necessary for effective functioning in the world at present. Lack of specificity in commitment characterizes the "instant society" in which we live.

Commitment and Psychological Health

Commitment has supreme significance in my life when mental health is considered. I know of no variable included in a lifestyle more important than an adequate, healthy, goal which has become central to me—things that give life purpose and meaning— direction! The individual who is not committed, or is vague in his commitments, will be a person who wanders around in life with little direction or achievement. He characteristically moves from one person to another, from one career to another, and his neurosis is shared as unhappiness with his lack of accomplishment in anything or any relationship. It is impossible to be successful without commitment...to be stable in relationships or careers unless one is committed...to ever find meaning and purpose in life without a tenacity that is characterized by firm commitments to something.

This is true because commitment prevents disintegration in an individual's life. The problem with survival in a relationship, career or in anything I do in life is really not that which is outside of me. More often it's the movement of my inner strength and tenacity that enables me to endure, succeed, and conquer. For this reason, commitment to Jesus produces sweeping changes in the life of any individual who makes Him his object of commitment. The God of the universe dwells in me when I am committed to Him. Scripture describes this as becoming a new creation in Christ, with old things passing away and all things becoming new, 2 Corinthians 5:17. In another sense, it might be called the reorganizing of the core of my life; a reshaping of my heart and its desires. And with this reorganization, I am able to mold with new vigor the environment and directions I truly desire to pursue. I am no longer like the keys of a piano played upon by forces beyond me and my control.

Perhaps no psychological variable is more important to my overall health than commitment. What is of supreme importance to me will become the focus of my entire life. Conversely, the direction of my behavior usually tells the story of my true commitments. Consider the reasons for the significance of commitments. First let me say that a goal to be of highest value to my mental health must be both enduring (lasting) and of greatest value. It is possible to have enduring goals that will lead to the destruction of an individual. A lifelong goal of hedonism or self-gratification will surely lead to ultimate disintegration and ruin. On the other hand, a goal may be of value and not enduring. One can pursue a college or graduate education, but when that is achieved (if it is the chief goal of life), what then? One is back to square one or first base and must look for other goals. So let's agree that to be of ultimate value psychologically, that to which I am committed must be both enduring and of value.

What is it then that helps me function effectively psychologically, spiritually, and physically, when I have valued and enduring commitments?

First, there is a sense of direction and purpose for my life. At last, I know where I am going and can begin to move in that direction in increments.

Secondly, I begin to experience a sense of accomplishment which almost everyone agrees is important. Maslow speaks of this as "self-actualization", and places it at the top of his hierarchy of human needs when discussing ultimate psychological health. Surely this is to be desired as a Christian for the glory of God.

Thirdly, systematic and progressive movements toward these goals lessen stress in my life that relates to indecision, uncertainty, and poor self-concept. These conditions are often the products of no direction.

In the fourth place, being committed to something of value ensures my movement towards an efficiency of functioning in my walk with God, my ministry, my interpersonal relationships and my vocational pursuits (which are the ways I express myself to my environment). This, in turn, produces a healthy harmony in my life that moves me towards a place of honesty and fulfillment, purpose and meaning. Psychological health aids physical health and assists in long life and productivity.

I have wondered, incidentally, why people in helping professions are seldom ill? Could it be that their goals as true people helpers are more apt to be both of value and possessing endurance?

Commitment and My Tomorrows

The matter of the future is sometimes important to people as they think of commitment. "I fear commitment because I am not really sure what the future holds for me." "Things could change so easily!" "What if this or that happens?" Thinking like this does not belong in the order of commitment. It simply doesn't fit! This is a call for passivity—just drifting with the stream—moving with passing events. It is like saying, "There is no purpose in committing because I'm just a victim anyway." But this kind of attitude, in reality, deprives an individual of inner stability and direction, as well as an opportunity to control the environment in a way that enables him to be where he would really like to be.

If I would like to have a successful relationship with a person, I might hope for that, try to have a relationship to see where it will lead, and even make a half-hearted effort if "all goes well". But if I never commit, when I experience problems, I will move away and begin to look for another relationship. Think of coming to God in that way and you think of something that assures failure in the life from the very beginning. I do not come to Him with the idea of seeing what it is like...being tentative in the sense of "if few difficulties arise perhaps I will be able to continue". Jesus said, "Take my yoke upon you and learn ME." Not "Come unto me and learn my benefits." "Yoke" is a word rich in meaning. It implies commitment to the Lordship of Jesus and in turn makes me an obedient servant and laborer with a will that is only HIS. This certainly rules out tentativeness in this commitment. We share His yoke. "Take my yoke!" Yoke implies submission. We are yoked together with Him through our commitment.

This is also true in the matter of interpersonal relationships. I have a desire for a relationship with a person. I get to know him deeply. I make a commitment to him and turn my life in his direction. Let me try to describe what it means to be committed.

1. This person or cause is supremely important in my life... almost a matter of life and death.

2. With an act of my will I make a commitment and the entire direction of my life is going to be turned toward it.

3. My inner life is reorganized at the core or heart to protect and enhance that commitment and fortify it against any enemy. 1 John 2:15-16 tells me not to love the world-system. I work to set my affections on things above, Colossians 3:1. It is ever in my mind and heart to protect that commitment to the Lord Jesus. So also with the person I am committed to...ever protecting, ever enhancing, doing nothing that would threaten or endanger that commitment to the beloved one. I even approach my career or ministry in this way. We live in a day when characteristically people are involved in multiple projects or careers and fail to give full effort to anything.

4. Honesty will characterize my inner and outer life in an effort to be- come transparent in my overall behavior and be consistent with my commitment.

5. I will hang on with all my strength and life. Winston Churchill once asked an enemy why an English bulldog's nose slanted backward. Upon receiving no answer, he stated, "Because when he gets hold of you, he never lets go, and he still has to breathe." Commitment is getting hold of something and never letting go.

To live life without commitments is like drifting in the wide ocean with no oar or compass. It is to only hope that somehow I will find that situation, that person that promises me love and esteem, that paradise that gives me purpose, that involvement that will enable me to develop and become all I can become instead of knowing only stark meaninglessness and stunted usefulness.

No one models commitment more clearly than the Apostle Paul. A zealous Ph.D. rabbi, he tenaciously studied the Scriptures. He kept the law carefully and meticulously. He persecuted the early church with zeal, giving his approval to the murder of Stephen. And when the Lord seized him on the road to Damascus, he became a bold zealot for Christ. Hear him speak in Philippians 3:13,14, "...forgetting those things which are behind, and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Is this not commitment? Is this not reorganization...the turning a life completely in the direction of not only a cause, but more preeminently, a PERSON?

Long Commitment in the Same Direction

It is important to consider that commitment usually implies long-term involvement...long movement in the same direction...not a "wait and see" attitude. A hesitant attitude only leads to the disintegration of the individual and true commitment. Such hesitance is the way to ensure no movement. One cannot ensure failure in a relationship more firmly. It will go nowhere if it lacks genuine positive commitment. There is no basis for working with ongoing everyday problems when one does not have the inner reorganization in the very heart of his person to make that relationship precious. Such a relationship is doomed when the newness wears off. It will assuredly fail. And those in such a relationship will stagger from one relationship to another experiencing their lack of success in relating, but never knowing why it's so bad.

In this "instant society", people tend to shun long commitments. There is a "tired look" at so much time being involved in the accomplishment of something worthwhile. Because of this, there is hesitance in working toward what could truly be of value; i.e., (1) a college education, (2) preparation for ministry, (3) a genuinely fulfilling career, (4) a loving and fulfilling relationship, or (5) the accomplishment of a ministry that would transform a region and significantly impact the world. This is reality...the passing of two years, the movement of three or four years into yesterday...these will speedily pass whether or not I commit myself to anything. And unless I am committed to something, they will simply become dead, wasted years like all my other "chunks of time".

Commitment and My Decision-Making

Commitment involves a mental attitude and an act of one's volition. It is characteristic of commitment that one decides what is going to be his or what direction he is going to take.

Peter sat in my office struggling within himself to understand his personal commitments. He had achieved a place of leadership in his profession, but his life was in shambles. He brushed a tear as he sought to understand the direction of his life that had led him to such a place of misery. Commitments? Actually, he couldn't remember ever committing himself to anything. But there were unconscious commitments, and after struggling in silence for what seemed like hours, he burst into tears and exclaimed, "Pleasure and self-gratification are in reality my only commitments!" Then he wept profusely, but his heart seemed relieved. Peter is today committed to Christ and His ministry of discipleship.

Where are your commitments today? How committed are you to anything? Is only what brings you pleasure and self-gratification your true motivators? Are you "wishy-washy" and vague in what is truly important to you?

Commitment and Flexibility

Many years ago, Gordon Allport wrote a little book entitled Becoming. In this brief homily, he coupled the concept of tentativeness with commitment. His basic proposition was that tentativeness needed to accompany commitment in order to help us not become encapsulated. Otherwise growth would be blocked. Developing his basic ideas, he talked of the "half-sure—whole-hearted" person. I both like and dislike this term. I could surely never say that commitments—my commitment to God, the Scriptures, my major goals in life—are from a "half-sure" vantage point. There was nothing "half-sure" about my coming to Jesus that night many years ago in the middle of the North Atlantic. I was a tired, helpless and seemingly hopeless young sailor with no goals, feeling doomed. I crawled to the feet of the Savior wanting only Him, the forgiveness of my sin, the cleansing of my wounds. Tentative? No—desperate! And needing to hook my life to something or Someone Who would give me hope and meaning. As a result of that commitment so many years ago, I KNOW Jesus! He lives! I could never doubt that. There is nothing tentative about that.

On the other hand, none of us want to feel trapped in a position where there is no room to think, rethink and grow. Human understanding is at best flawed and frayed. It would seem that tentativeness or openness does belong somewhere with commitment. Perhaps the concept of tentativeness should be replaced by "flexibility". Tentativeness does not seem to adequately relate to faith and hope. But flexibility can be consistent with growth and the allowing of adequate thought processes for further investigation and dealing with the unknown.

When commitment is not of supreme importance in an individual's life, the individual is usually characterized by tentativeness in what he does. And this is not commitment at all.

Consistent with growth and stability is commitment with the ability to make shifts and alterations as needed in the months and years that follow any commitment.

It would seem that I first turn my life in the direction of my chief desires—my dreams. I experience the reorganization of the core of my inner life as a result of these acts of my will or volition. My commitment dominates my thinking, and my way of thinking energizes my commitment. I allow nothing else to impinge upon that choice—that desire—that passion. I cultivate it, facilitate it, guard it! If I must ultimately reevaluate it, that in itself can only make commitment stronger. It is unlikely that commitment to something of real continuing value and enrichment will be shaken by a flexibility that allows rethinking and new ways to enhance and strengthen that commitment.

But I do not begin with tentative ideas that exclude FIRM commitments. That kind of commitment leads nowhere. That is nothing! Commitment, not tentativeness, is for the strong, the resolute, the courageous; for dreamers and acquirers, and achievers!

Illustrating Commitment and Flexibility in Proper Perspective

I would like to give two illustrations that describe what we have just been talking about. These are illustrations of tentative commitments as opposed to commitments with flexibility.

The first involves participation in a discipling ministry. Tentative commitments involve this kind of thinking.

"I know I should grow, learn how to study the Scriptures, witness and pray. I'm really very busy (who isn't), but perhaps I can work it into my busy schedule cluttered with my many other (tentative) commitments. So I'll try! I'm going to try to make it a part of my life."

The basic commitment in this instance is to tentativeness rather than discipleship. My prediction is that this person will become a dropout—someone who falls by the wayside. Why? Simply because there is no real commitment.

Then there is the person who is committed, but is able to integrate flexibility into his commitment. The following is an illustration of how he thinks.

"I want to grow, learn to share the Gospel, perfect my walk and pray effectively. I'm going to make room for this and invest enough time to make this productive. If it becomes too difficult for me, I'll make some adjustments or changes so I can continue. But I will do it. It will become part of my life." In this instance, the basic commitment is to discipleship, and to the Lordship of Jesus.

A final illustration of the principles of commitment and tentativeness is one relating to interpersonal relationships. Part of the bond that God recognizes in a living relationship relates to commitment. The partners are to leave father and mother and be committed to each other—"leaving and cleaving".

But if my commitment is one that is tentative commitment, it is more like "I'll try. Let's see if we like each other, can live together compatibly, handle resources mutually, get along with each other and our families, and stay in love. If we are successful, we will continue until we tire of things, and then, perhaps, if we must, go our separate ways."

Again, this is not a commitment to another person. It is only a commitment to tentativeness in a relationship, but not a commitment to a person. And there is no "reorganization at the core of one's life." Direction, and power to move in that direction, is lacking. There is little that will make the relationship work. Again, this is no commitment at all, and given time, erosion will set in and the relationship will surely fail.

On the other hand, commitment to love a person—to cleave to that person—to enhance the relationship with flexibility and tentativeness that will enable one to deal effectively with the unknown...yet always in the context of loving that person and being committed to them...this is COMMITMENT! It is commitment that will enable a relationship to grow and flourish. This reorganizes my inner life, and that reorganization is the secret of strength and wisdom in dealing with the unknown.

Commitment and the End of Life

Words about commitment would be incomplete without something concerning the importance of commitment in relation to the full scope of my existence. Erikson has written extensively in the area of psychosocial development. His works are held in high regard in academic circles. He has suggested stages of development that are helpful in understanding problems that individuals face as they grow and experience life.

Following the period that relates to mid-life, which is almost always a struggle for adults in contemporary society, we approach a time he describes as "Integrity verses Despair". This is when an individual begins to look backward (not around as in mid-life) and attempts to see his life in terms of accomplishments. He says one will have a sense of integrity if he sees he has made a difference. If not, there can only be continuing despair. We psychologists will often encounter a person about to enter old age who is in a state of all-consuming depression. This has been called involutional melancholia and it is a depression specifically related to the despair of having made no difference in the world, and the awareness that it probably isn't ever going go be any different.

Of course, Christ and commitment to Him can make a difference at any age. But try to imagine what your life will be like twenty or thirty years from now with the same level of commitment that characterizes your present life. Will you feel positive about the impact and difference you have made?

Then think of Paul, the apostle. Listen to his words at the end of his life. "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the course, I have kept the faith," 2 Timothy 4:7. Again, he could write the church at Thessalonica and say, "For who is our hope or joy or crown of exulting? Is it not even you in the presence of our Lord Jesus at His coming?" 1 Thessalonians 2:19-20. Again in the book of Daniel, chapter 12 and verse 3 we read, "And those who have insight will shine brightly like the brightness of the expanse of heaven, and those who lead many to righteousness, like the stars forever and ever."

Being able to participate in these kinds of riches toward the later years of one's life speaks of the need of strong and early commitments. There will be a time in most of our lives when we will take a hard look backwards and review what is now unchangeable for all eternity. Will you be able to see solid relationships, trophies of grace, consistent growth and development toward being conformed to the image of God's dear Son? Or will it be a relaxed "laizze-faire" tentative approach to life that has produced a trail of nothing!

Someone once said..."To sow a thought is to reap an act. To sow an act is to reap a tendency. To sow a tendency is to reap a habit. To sow a habit is to reap a character. To sow a character is to reap a destiny." What I am committed to today will determine my tomorrows. Commitment to Jesus and His Lordship is the only valid action that assures integrity and joy in the future.

Emery Nester, Ed.D., Psychologist, Servant of the only true God, Jehovah.

The question sometimes arises concerning the use of Lifestyle Discipleship without a discipler. Obviously, if the manual is used by someone who is interested in developing a discipling ministry, but doesn't have someone near who has experience using the materials, some accommodation to the rules for use must be made.

It is the desire of the writer that it be used worldwide. There will, of necessity, be some who must begin without working with a formal discipler. What is necessary, what is to be expected, and what are some things such an individual can do? In this short discussion, I wish to help you get started on your own if you do not have someone who has used the materials and who will spend time discipling you.

The Criteria

It is important for you to look at the criteria under the articles "Upon Considering Whom to Disciple, Consider This," and "Minimal Expectations for a Timothy". These are found in the section in the manual called, "Preparation for Discipling", (session 28).

Within these two brief articles, criteria for choosing a person to disciple are discussed. It is important that you meet these criteria. Perhaps I should list a few to reemphasize them.

1. Faithfulness is supreme. Unless you possess the characteristic of faithfulness, it will be difficult to do this on your own. We are urged to "consider the cost" before we set out to build something, and this is certainly important when we begin to build into a life.

2. There needs to be a willingness to make a long commitment. This can only be accomplished if you are willing to get going and become a visionary. Along with everything else, we need people who are willing to make commitments for a lifetime.

3. You may not agree with everything in the manual. That is perfectly all right. But at least, be willing to be taught.

Getting Started

The most obvious way to get going is to find another person who would want to do this with you. Most of what I want to say is related to your being able to find this person.

You will need to review the criteria above and be in agreement. This is very important. You must agree that you will be accountable to each other. You will begin together and continue to work together, discussing the lessons, reviewing the Scripture verses, and praying together just as you would with a discipler. In reality, you will need to consider this person your discipler, and they would consider you the same. Meet together as each other's discipler.

When you reach the place about seven months into the study where we begin discipling another person, each of you will pick up your person and help and supervise each other as you begin meeting with a real live disciple for the first time.

At this point you are on your own as far as discipling is concerned, and you have accomplished this without the ordinary reality of being discipled yourself. It is a bit sad that you have not had the privilege of enjoying someone coming alongside of you in the same way, but at least you are doing your part in the Great Commission.