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1. God created Adam master and Lord of all living creatures, but Eve spoiled it all. - Martin Luther

2. I have always thought that every woman should marry, and no man. - Benjamin Disraeli

3. 20,000,000 young women rose to their feet with the cry, “We will not be dictated to” and promptly became stenographers. - G. K. Chesterton

4. Lady Astor: “Winston, if you were my husband I should flavor your coffee with poison.”
Churchill: “Madam, if I were your husband, I should drink it.”

5. Bessie Braddock, M.P.: “Winston, you’re drunk.”
Churchill: “Bessie, you’re ugly, and tomorrow morning I’ll be sober.”

6. Earl Warren (Supreme Court Justice): “I’m pleased to see such a dense crown here tonight.”
Heckler: “Don’t be too pleased, Governor; we ain’t all dense.”

7. Congressman John Randolf and Henry Clay met on a sidewalk in Washington.
Clay: “I, sir, do not step aside for a scoundrel.”
Randolf: “On the other hand, I always do.”

8. Lincoln of Steven Douglas: “His argument is as thin as the homeopathic soup made by boiling the shadow of a pigeon that had been starved to death.”

9. I know why the sun never sets on the British Empire: God wouldn’t trust an Englishman in the dark. - Duncan Spaeth

10. Of course America had been discovered before Columbus, but it had always been hushed up.
- Oscar Wilde

11. They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge.
- Rep. Thomas Reed, Speaker of the House, of two fellow congressmen

12. If you can’t say something good about somebody, sit right here beside me. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth, on a pillow in her sitting room.

13. Your manuscript is both original and good.
But the parts that are original are not good,
and the parts that are good are not original. - Samuel Johnson

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