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Religion as Baseball

  • Calvinists believe the game is fixed.
  • Lutherans believe they can't win, but trust the Scorekeeper.
  • Quakers won't swing.
  • Unitarians can catch anything.
  • Amish walk a lot.
  • Pagans sacrifice.
  • Jehovah's Witnesses are thrown out often.
  • Tele-evangelists get caught stealing.
  • Episcopalians pass the plate.
  • Evangelicals make effective pitches.
  • Fundamentalists balk.
  • Mormons are in left field.
  • Dunkers are down by three.
  • Adventists have a seventh-inning stretch.
  • Atheists refuse to have an Umpire.
  • Baptists want to play hardball.
  • Premillenialists expect the game to be called soon on account of darkness.
  • The Pope claims never to have committed an error.

(Unknown Internet source)