17. Living in the Light While Residing in a Dark World

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For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. For it is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, for it is light that makes everything visible. This is why it is said: “Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.” (Ephesians 5:8-14)

How can we live in the light while residing in a dark world?

Paul is continuing his exhortation to imitate God that began in Ephesians 5:1-7. He called the believers to imitate God by living a life of love, and by getting rid of sexual immorality of every sort, including activities, thoughts, and words. Here the believers are called to imitate God by walking as children of light.

John MacArthur says this about the figurative use of the word “light”:

In Scripture the figurative use of light has two aspects, the intellectual and the moral. Intellectually it represents truth, whereas morally it represents holiness. To live in light therefore means to live in truth and in holiness. The figure of darkness has the same two aspects. Intellectually it represents ignorance and falsehood, whereas morally it connotes evil.¹

We see this in many places. Psalm 119:105 says, “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path,” In this reference, “light” refers to intellectual truth as found in God’s Word. In Romans 13:12-14, “light” refers to moral deeds and “darkness” to immoral deeds.

The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light. Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy. Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the sinful nature.

In Isaiah 5:20, these words refer to both the intellectual and the moral. It says, “Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter.”

Believers are in the light because they have been changed intellectually and morally. How can believers continually imitate God by living in the light? In this study, we will consider six truths about living in the light.

Big Question: How can believers live in the light, as commanded in Ephesians 5:8-14?

To Live in the Light, Believers Must Remember that Light, Not Darkness, Is Their Nature

For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (Ephesians 5:8)

Here, Paul reminds believers that they were once darkness, but are now light in the Lord. It is interesting to consider that he does not say believers were “in” darkness, but they “were” darkness. That is the character of every believer before coming to Christ. There has been a definite character change in the life of every true believer. By using the term “children of light,” Paul reminds us that we have our Father’s nature (cf. 2 Peter 1:4).

In John 8:12, Jesus says, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” In Psalm 27:1, God is called “light” and “salvation.” This is the character and nature of God our Father, and we have his nature.

Interpretation Question: In what ways is the believer light and the world darkness?

1. The believer is light because he knows God.

Romans 1:21-23 describes the world as intellectually darkened in reference to knowing God the Creator. It says,

For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like mortal man and birds and animals and reptiles.

People of the world have darkened minds. They profess to be wise when they are really fools. They deny the living God by worshiping false gods or denying his existence. Psalm 14:1 says the fool says in his heart there is no God. The world is dark because people do not know or even acknowledge God. But believers are light because they know the light—they know God.

2. The believer is light because he knows the gospel and Scripture in general.

Second Corinthians 4:4 says, “The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God.” The world is blinded to the light of the gospel. First Corinthians 1:18 says, “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” Though the world rejects the gospel, to the believer, it is the power and wisdom of God.

Not only are unbelievers blinded to the gospel, they are also blinded to Scripture in general. First Corinthians 2:14 says, “The man without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually discerned.” While the world rejects Scripture and cannot understand it, it is the believer’s daily bread (Matt 4:4), constant meditation (Psalm 1:2), and joy (Psalm 119:24).

3. The believer is light because he practices the character of righteousness.

Romans 13:12-14 says,

As believers, we called to put aside the deeds of darkness and clothe ourselves with Christ.

Similarly, 1 John 3:10 says, “This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children of the devil are: Anyone who does not do what is right is not a child of God; nor is anyone who does not love his brother.” Children of God are identified by their obedience to God, and unbelievers are identified by their disobedience.

Essentially, to be in darkness is to be ignorant of God and his Word and to practice rebellion in regards to those things. The world is darkness, but the believer is light. He knows the truth about creation, the gospel, and God, and he lives in view of these realities that the world rejects.

Application Question: What applications can we take from believers being children of light?

1. Believer must shine their light by placing it in the most strategic places.

Christ says this in Matthew 5:14-16:

“You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.”

Christians must put their light on a stand (Matt 5:15). When placing a lamp in a house, people put it in the most advantageous position. We must do the same with our lives. We must consider this when deciding where we will work, live, and go to church. How can we most effectively spread our light?

Also, we must remove anything that might dim our light or make it ineffective. There are certain environments that could hinder the effectiveness of our light by either causing us to hide it or by blowing it out as we succumb to temptation. Believers must place their light on a stand for all to see.

Placing our light in the most strategic places also includes helping it get stronger and shine the brightest. For example, this might include things like being involved in a good church, seeking godly mentors, and reading the right books.

2. Believers must avoid the temptation to hide their light.

In Mark 4:21, Christ asks, “Do you bring in a lamp to put it under a bowl or a bed? Instead, don’t you put it on its stand?” Many commentators believe the bowl and the bed represent common reasons that people hide their light. Some hide it because of work. The bowl which Christ refers to is probably a bushel for collecting grain. Many believers get so busy at work that they hide the light of Christ, or they hide it so as to not hinder their chances of promotion. However, our light should not be hidden under the bushel of work. Secondly, Christians tend to hide their light simply because of laziness, as symbolized by a bed. They are too lazy to go to church, read their Bibles, serve on missions, or share the gospel.

No wise person puts a lamp under a bowl or a bed—and neither should believers. Our light is more important than any lamp in a house. We must strategically place our lamps in places that will maximize their output and effectiveness for the kingdom of God.

Application Questions: In what ways are you tempted to hide your light? In what ways do you believe God is calling you to place your light in the most effective location?

To Live in the Light, Believers Must Produce the Fruit of Light

(for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) (Ephesians 5:9)

Observation Question: With what terms does Paul describe the fruit of the light?

The next thing believers must do to live in the light is to produce fruit consistent with light. Paul uses several terms in describing the fruit of the light. We can understand these terms better by comparing them with their opposites.

1. Goodness.

Goodness refers to anything that is morally excellent, including generosity.² One commentator calls it “love in action.”³ It probably focuses on our relationship to others, including meeting the needs of those around us, serving them, and caring for them. Galatians 6:10 says, “Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.”

It is the opposite of selfishness and apathy towards the needs of others. Like Christ, who is the light, we must go out of our way to serve and minister to the needs of the world, and especially to believers.

Are you bearing the fruit of goodness? Or are you cultivating apathy and selfishness?

2. Righteousness.

There are two aspects to this fruit. First, it has to do with our relationship with God. Romans 4:5 says, “However, to the man who does not work but trusts God who justifies the wicked, his faith is credited as righteousness.” In salvation, God gives us his Son’s righteousness to make us acceptable in his eyes.

Secondly, it has to do with how we live. As those justified and made righteous by God, we must daily practice righteousness. James 2:17 says, “Faith without works is dead.” First John 2:29 says, “If you know that he is righteous, you know that everyone who does what is right has been born of him.” True believers practice a lifestyle of righteousness. These fruits should be continually borne in our lives, instead of the fruits of evil and sin.

3. Truth.

“The third fruit of the light is truth. Truth has to do with honesty, reliability, trustworthiness, and integrity—in contrast to the hypocritical, deceptive, and false ways of the old life of darkness.”⁴ It is conformity to the Word of God in thought and action. Is the fruit of truth growing in your life? Or is hypocrisy and deception?

Many have noted how goodness seems to focus primarily on how we relate to others, righteousness on how we relate to God, and truth on how we relate to ourselves.

Application Question: How can we produce the fruit of light?

As with any fruit, it is produced in the right environment. What is the right environment? Essentially, it is our relationship with Christ. John 15:5 says, “‘I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”

We must make our home in Christ through prayer, his Word, fellowship with the saints, worship, and service. As we do this, the fruits of goodness, righteousness, and truth are produced in our lives.

Are you bearing the fruit of light in your life or the fruit of darkness?

Application Question: What fruit do you most desire to produce in your spiritual life and why?

To Live in the Light, Believers Must Continually Discern What Pleases God

and find out what pleases the Lord. (Ephesians 5:10)

Not only must believers produce the fruit of light, but they also must continually find out what pleases the Lord. “Find out” can also be translated “to test, discern, and approve.”⁵ It was used of testing a metal to see if it was genuine.⁶

William MacDonald says this about “finding out what pleases the Lord”:

Those who walk in the light not only produce the type of fruit listed in the preceding verse, but also find out what is acceptable to the Lord. They put every thought, word, and action to the test. What does the Lord think about this? How does it appear in His presence? Every area of life comes under the searchlight—conversation, standard of living, clothes, books, business, pleasures, entertainments, furniture, friendships, vacations, cars, and sports.⁷

Certainly, finding out what pleases the Lord also applies to knowing God’s will in specific circumstances.

Interpretation Question: How can believers test and discern if something is pleasing to God or if it is his specific will for our lives?

1. Believers test and discern God’s will by using God’s Word.

God’s Word either tells us what to do, or gives us principles to apply to discern God’s will. In applying Scripture, we should ask questions like, “Is it moral?” “Is it helpful to others?” and “Is it honoring to God?”

God’s will never conflicts with his Word. God’s Word is the revelation of his character and being, and it trains the man of God for all righteousness (2 Tim 3:17).

2. Believers test and discern God’s will by putting God first in their lives.

Proverbs 3:6 says, “In all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your paths.” The more we put God first in our daily lives—through family, work, entertainment, etc., the more God will make his will clear to us. If we neglect God or de-prioritize him, we will not be able to discern his good and pleasing will.

3. Believers test and discern God’s will by not conforming to the pattern of the world.

Romans 12:2 says, “Do not conform any longer to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind so that you can test and approve what is that good and perfect will of God.” If a believer is conforming to the world in thought or action, it will inhibit his ability to hear and discern God’s guidance.

4. Believers test and discern God’s will by considering both their heart desires and whether they have peace in their hearts.

Philippians 2:13 says he works in us “to will and to do according to his good pleasure.” This means that God is always working in our hearts to help us discern and do his will. Psalm 37:4 says, “Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.” When I am walking with God—abiding in his Word, prayer, and the fellowship of the saints—many times the desires in my heart are of the Lord. In discerning what is pleasing to God, we must discern what God is doing in our hearts.

But also, in considering our hearts, we must consider whether or not we have peace, as this often is an indicator of God’s leading. Consider what Paul says in 2 Corinthians 2:12-13:

Now when I went to Troas to preach the gospel of Christ and found that the Lord had opened a door for me, I still had no peace of mind, because I did not find my brother Titus there. So I said good-by to them and went on to Macedonia.

Paul lived for open doors to preach the gospel; however, he left Troas because he had no peace of mind. Many times, God leads us through peace or lack of it. Colossians 3:15 says, “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts.” “Rule” was used of an umpire at an athletic game. The umpire calls, “Safe!” “Out!” or “Winner!” This text can also be translated as, “Let the peace of Christ decide.”

Sadly, instead of being led by God’s peace, many are led by fear of the future, fear of what people think, or fear of failure. God works in our hearts to will and do of his good pleasure. He guides us by his peace, not by fear and anxiety.

5. Believers test and discern God’s will by considering the counsel of other believers.

Proverbs 11:14 says there is safety and victory in the multitude of counselors. Scripture records that when God called somebody to do something, he often confirmed it through a prophet or another believer. God does the same with us. We should seek the counsel of other believers, especially in major decisions like who to marry, what school to go to, what job to take, etc. God often guides us through the counsel of wise believers. Proverbs 15:22 says, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

6. Believers test and discern God’s will by considering open and closed doors.

God is sovereign over all things. Many times, he makes his will clear by closing or opening doors.

If we are going to walk in the light, we must find out what is pleasing to God. We do this by bringing every thought and decision before the Lord so he can shine his light on it. He clarifies his will through his Word, other believers, our hearts, and his sovereignty, among other things.

Application Questions: In what other ways can believers discern what is pleasing to the Lord? Describe a time when God clearly guided you.

To Live in the Light, Believers Must Not Partake in Darkness, but Expose It

Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. For it is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. (Ephesians 5:11-12)

The next thing believers must do to live in the light is to not partake in darkness, but to expose it instead. “The verb translated here as “expose” (from elegchō) can also carry the idea of reproof, correction, punishment, or discipline.”⁸

Interpretation Question: How should believers expose the deeds of darkness?

1. Believers expose darkness indirectly by living holy lives.

Many times it will simply be the fact that believers do not curse, cheat, get drunk, have sex outside marriage, or lie that exposes the sin in others’ lives. A life of light exposes the sin of those around it. The rebuke of the light typically invokes either desire to change or anger. First Peter 4:3-4 says:

For you have spent enough time in the past doing what pagans choose to do—living in debauchery, lust, drunkenness, orgies, carousing and detestable idolatry. They think it strange that you do not plunge with them into the same flood of dissipation, and they heap abuse on you.

In a world that loves darkness and hates light, believers will constantly be mocked, thought strange, and sometimes persecuted for living a lifestyle of holiness. John 3:19-20 says:

This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed.

One must realize that living a holy life is both rare and strange in this world. Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego were thrown into the fire for not bowing down to Nebuchadnezzar (Daniel 3). Daniel was cast into the lions’ den simply because he prayed three times a day to the true God instead of false gods (Dan 6). Jesus was crucified. We must welcome the cross our own Savior bore. He was the Light and the world hated him; we will often receive that same displeasure.

Are you willing to be different even if it means being considered strange or hated?

2. Believers expose darkness directly by words of correction.

Our exposure of darkness is not just indirect; it is also direct. We must call lying “sin,” cheating “sin,” adultery “sin,” and fornication and homosexuality “sin”—again, often incurring the wrath of the world for doing so.

Kent Hughes says:

We need to be ethical light when we are in the office, in the classroom, in the shop, and in the Church. We must be willing to risk being called “negative,” “narrow,” “judgmental,” “puritanical,” or “bigoted.” If God’s Spirit is calling us to stand up against wrong, it is up to us to be faithful.⁹

But we must not only expose the darkness by calling it darkness, we must also expose the darkness with the gospel. One cannot preach the gospel without exposing sin. Sadly, this is often neglected in gospel presentations. The gospel says that all men are sinners under the judgment of a holy God (Rom 3:23, 6:23). It calls men to repent of their lifestyles of sin and turn to Jesus to save them. Yes, we must expose the darkness by teaching the gospel to a world under God’s wrath.

Are you willing to expose sin through correction and sharing the gospel with others?

3. Believers expose darkness by not even talking about things that happen in the dark.

Believers must wisely not discuss many of the details of events that happen in the darkness. By discussing these, they give life to them and contaminate others with filth.

John MacArthur sheds light on Paul’s comment:

Some things are so vile that they should be discussed in as little detail as possible, because even describing them is morally and spiritually dangerous.

Some diseases, chemicals, and nuclear by–products are so extremely deadly that even the most highly trained and best–protected technicians and scientists who work with them are in constant danger. No sensible person would work around such things carelessly or haphazardly.

In the same way, some things are so spiritually disgraceful and dangerous that they should be sealed off not only from direct contact but even from conversation. They should be exposed only to the extent necessary to be rid of them.

Some books and articles written by Christians on various moral issues are so explicit that they almost do as much to spread as to cure the problem. We can give God’s diagnosis and solution for sins without portraying every sordid detail.¹⁰

By choosing to refrain from certain conversations and jokes, it again shows how perverse the world is. Believers must use wisdom in their conversations and interactions. Every word must be “full of grace” and “seasoned with salt.” (Col 4:6).

Application Questions: What makes exposing the darkness in a company, a church, or a relationship difficult? How can we do this wisely? Share a time when God called you to expose darkness. How did it turn out?

In Order to Live in the Light, Believers Must Convert Darkness into Light

But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, for it is light that makes everything visible. (Ephesians 5:13)

Interpretation Question: What does Paul mean by “for it is light that makes everything visible”?

Next, in order to live in the light, believers must convert darkness into light. “For it is light that makes everything visible” can also be translated “for everything that becomes visible is light” (NASB). “When light touches something, it becomes light. It is lit up; and, to some degree, the object gives off light itself. It is converted and changed.”¹¹

In the same way, the light of a believer’s life often changes a work environment as sin is exposed and righteousness replaces it. It changes people’s lives as they repent and give their lives to Christ. Light is by nature more powerful than darkness. It changes environments and lives.

First Peter 2:12 says, “Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.” Though believers are persecuted and mocked by the world, their conduct often leads to change in those around them, even if only slowly. When Christ comes, many will glorify God for the chaste life of a Christian co-worker, friend or family member who led them to Christ.

Peter also says this to believing wives of unbelieving husbands (1 Peter 3:1-2):

Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.

The pure and holy life of a godly wife often changes an unbelieving husband, even without words.

Application Question: How have you seen or experienced light converting darkness in your life or the lives of others?

To Live in the Light, Believers Must Preach to the Sleeping

This is why it is said: “Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.” (Ephesians 5:14)

Interpretation Question: Where is Paul quoting from in Ephesians 5:14?

Commentators are not sure where this quote comes from. Some believe he is drawing from Isaiah 60:1: “Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the LORD rises upon you.” Others believe he is drawing from an Easter hymn sung by the early church. It was probably used as an invitation to unbelievers visiting congregations.¹²

Either way, Paul clearly calls for Christians to preach to those who are asleep. The actions and words of Christians should speak to unbelievers—encouraging them to repent and follow Christ. But, they also speak to believers, as is probably the focus in this context. There are many believers living a lifestyle of darkness who need to repent.

In Romans 13:11-13, Paul uses the same terminology with reference to believers. He says,

And do this, understanding the present time. The hour has come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light. Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy.

Yes, many believers are slumbering in their spiritual lives. They are lukewarm—not on fire for God. By practicing the deeds of darkness—sexual immorality, drunkenness, dissension and jealousy—they live as though our Master is not returning soon. Believers must continually challenge them to wake up—to turn away from the darkness and to put on the light!

If we are going to walk in the light, we must not only seek the salvation of unbelievers, but also that of the church—for not all who profess Christ are living for him, or even saved (cf. Matt 7:21-23). There are many foolish virgins without oil who will be shut out of the wedding banquet—they have a form of godliness but not the inward reality (cf. Matt 25:1-13, 2 Tim 3:5). They must be warned in love (Eph 4:15).

Application Questions: How should we respond to believers who are asleep and living in the darkness? Why are so many believers spiritually lethargic?

Conclusion

How can believers live in the light while residing in a dark world?

To live in the light, believers must remember that light, not darkness, is their nature.
To live in the light, believers must produce the fruit of light.
To live in the light, believers must continually discern what pleases God.
To live in the light, believers must not partake in darkness, but expose it.
To live in the light, believers must convert darkness into light.
To live in the light, believers must preach to the sleeping.

Unless otherwise noted, the primary Scriptures used are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version ®, Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by the International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked KJV or AKJV are from the King James Version or Authorized (King James) Version of the Bible.

All emphases in Scripture quotations and commentators’ quotations have been added.

¹ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (pp. 205–206). Chicago: Moody Press.

² Hughes, R. K. (1990). Ephesians: the mystery of the body of Christ (p. 165). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

³ Wiersbe, W. W. (1996). The Bible exposition commentary (Vol. 2, p. 45). Wheaton, IL: Victor Books.

⁴ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 210). Chicago: Moody Press.

⁵ Stott, J. R. W. (1979). God’s new society: the message of Ephesians (p. 200). Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press.

⁶ Accessed 9/28/2015 from https://www.blueletterbible.org/lang/lexicon/Lexicon.cfm?Strongs=G1381&t=KJV

⁷ MacDonald, W. (1995). Believer’s Bible Commentary: Old and New Testaments. (A. Farstad, Ed.) (p. 1943). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

⁸ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (pp. 211–212). Chicago: Moody Press.

⁹ Hughes, R. K. (1990). Ephesians: the mystery of the body of Christ (p. 167). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

¹⁰ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (pp. 212–213). Chicago: Moody Press.

¹¹ Teacher's Outline and Study Bible - Commentary - Teacher's Outline and Study Bible – Ephesians: The Teacher's Outline and Study Bible.

¹² MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (pp. 213–214). Chicago: Moody Press.

18. Living a Life of Wisdom Instead of Foolishness

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Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Ephesians 5:15-21)

How can we live a wise life?

Paul calls believers to imitate God (cf. Ephesians 5:1). We imitate God by living a life of love (Eph 5:1), by living as light (v. 8), and finally, by living wise lives (v. 15).

In Scripture, foolishness and wisdom are not intellectual issues; they are moral issues. According to Psalm 14:1, “The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God.’ They are corrupt, their deeds are vile; there is no one who does good.” The fool does not recognize God, and lives a life of evil. However, the wise man knows God and obeys him. Proverbs 9:10 says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.” If we are going to live wise lives, we must worship and obey God.

In this section, we will consider four characteristics of a wise life.

Big Question: How can we live a life of wisdom according to Ephesians 5:15-21?

Believers Live a Life of Wisdom by Making the Most of Their Time

Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. (Ephesians 5:15-16)

One characteristic of wise people is that they make the most of their time in knowing and doing God’s will, whereas the fool wastes spiritual opportunities. Each day opportunities are lost to know God better, serve him, and build up his people.

“Making the most of every opportunity,” can be translated “redeeming the time.” It “has the basic meaning of buying, especially of buying back or buying out. It was used of buying a slave in order to set him free.”¹

History is full of great examples of wise, godly people who redeemed their time to the maximum potential. For example, “Jonathan Edwards, the philosopher-theologian who became God’s instrument in the ‘Great Awakening’ in America in 1734–5, wrote in the seventieth of his famous Resolutions just before his twentieth birthday: ‘Resolved: Never to lose one moment of time, but to improve it in the most profitable way I possibly can.’”² Similarly, “the great sixteenth–century reformer Philipp Melanchthon kept a record of every wasted moment and took his list to God in confession at the end of each day. It is small wonder that God used him in such great ways.”³

In contrast, “Judas, the most tragic example of wasted opportunity, spent three years in the very presence of the Son of God, as one of the inner circle of disciples, yet he betrayed His Lord and forfeited his soul for thirty pieces of silver.”⁴

As we consider these examples, we must ask ourselves, “How can we make the most of our opportunities to serve God and honor him?”

Application Question: How can we make the most of our time?

1. We must recognize how short our time is.

Moses says in Psalm 90:12 (NIV), “Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” The NLT translates this as, “Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom.” If we do not realize how short our time is, we will not make the most of it. Our time is short because death awaits us. It is short because certain opportunities currently before us will not always be there. These opportunities include such things as the ability to cultivate relationships, serve in ministry, and pursue education. Finally, our time is short because Christ could come at any moment.

Some, in the foolishness of youth, live like they will be young forever. “Let’s eat, drink, and have as much fun as possible,” they say, not realizing that today could be their last. But we should pray as Moses did: “Lord, help us to know the brevity of life so we can make the most of it for your kingdom and purposes.”

What else must we do to make the most of our time?

2. We must plan prayerfully.

Proverbs 21:5 says, “The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty.” Believers should prayerfully make long term plans: one-year, five-year and ten-year plans that include spiritual, vocational, family, and educational goals. They should also make daily plans. In fact, while taking a leadership class in seminary, I was taught to map out every hour of the day so I could best use it for God. Unaccounted hours are typically wasted hours.

It has often been said, “He who fails to plan, plans to fail.” Spiritual progress doesn’t happen by accident. It goes to the diligent who prayerfully seek God for the best and wisest ways to live.

Wise people are planners—they are not drifting through life. We must plan prayerfully even with our limited knowledge, while trusting God’s ultimate plan and his sovereignty over everything.

3. We must be willing to pay the price.

As mentioned, “making the most of” can be translated “redeeming,” or “buying.” There is a cost to making the most of our time. It means giving up other things we could do in order to best use our time. Be very careful of time wasters such as TV, social media, and video games. Yes, rest and recreation are important, but they must be limited. Doing so may well be part of the cost of living a wise life.

In addition, sometimes we may need to let go of relationships and other “good” things in order to make the most of our time for God. In business, these “good things” are called “opportunity costs”—things we must give up to take the best opportunities. Wise people are often brutal in cutting things out of their life that make them unproductive.

4. We must stay away from evil.

Finally, if we are to redeem our time, we must stay away from the foolishness of sin. Sin is the biggest waste of time. Paul implies this when he says to make “the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.” We live in a world full of evil and temptation. If we are not making the most of our time for God, then we will fall into the evil of the day.

As far as church is concerned, it is often the people who are not involved who tend to get trapped in evil—drunkenness, dishonest practices, ungodly relationships, addictions, etc. Instead of living wisely, they live as fools. If you don’t use your time for God, Satan will use it for his purposes. There are really only two options.

Application Questions: In what other ways can we make the most of our time? In what other ways do people tend to waste time and opportunities?

Believers Live a Life of Wisdom by Understanding God’s Will

Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. (Ephesians 5:17)

The next way to live a wise life is to know and understand God’s will. No doubt, we see this in Christ—the wisest man ever to live on the earth. Before going to the cross, he prayed, “Not my will but your will be done.” In fact, he taught us to pray, “Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” If we are going to live wise lives, we must be consumed with knowing and doing God’s will. We considered this in our discussion of Ephesians 5:10—”find out what pleases the Lord.” Therefore, we will cover it only briefly here.

Application Question: How can we know and understand God’s will?

1. To understand God’s will, we must know the Word of God.

Second Timothy 3:16-17 says that the Word of God equips the man of God for all righteousness. If it is righteous, God wants to equip us for it through his Word. David said, “Your word is light unto my path and a lamp unto my feet” (Psalm 119:105). If we are going to know God’s will in a dark world, we must walk in the light of God’s Word.

Through his Word, God tells us exactly what to do in situations where there is a moral choice, and gives us principles to apply in other situations. We must know God’s Word in order to understand God’s will.

2. To understand God’s will, we must pray.

James 1:5 says, “If anyone lacks wisdom, let him ask of God who gives liberally.” God wants to give us wisdom so we can make wise decisions that honor him. To know God’s will, we must be people of prayer.

3. To understand God’s will, we must rely on the body of Christ.

God often gives direction through the body of Christ. First Corinthians 12:21 says, “The eye cannot say to the hand, ‘I don’t need you!’” As we rely on the body, God gives insight and direction through its members. To not rely on the body is to spiritually impoverish ourselves, and often to miss God’s best.

Application Questions: What are some other ways that God guides us into his perfect will? Is there something specific for which you are currently seeking the Lord about?

Believers Live a Life of Wisdom by Staying Sober

Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. (Ephesians 5:18a)

Interpretation Question: In what ways does Scripture condemn the abuse of alcohol?

Another way believers live wisely is by being sober. Drunkenness was a common pastime in the ancient world, as it is today. Some people live to get drunk in their free time and on the weekends. Sadly, it is often seen as the only way to have fun. Living to get drunk is a wasted life, and Scripture condemns it. Isaiah 5:22 says, “Woe to those who are heroes at drinking wine and champions at mixing drinks.” MacDonald’s comments are helpful in understanding Scripture’s teaching on alcohol.

The Scriptures do not condemn the use of wine, but they do condemn its abuse. The use of wine as a medicine is recommended (Prov. 31:6; 1 Tim. 5:23). The Lord Jesus made wine for use as a beverage at the wedding in Cana of Galilee (John 2:1–11). But the use of wine becomes abuse under the following circumstances and is then forbidden:

1. When it leads to excess (Prov. 23:29–35).

2. When it becomes habit-forming (1 Cor. 6:12b).

3. When it offends the weak conscience of another believer (Rom. 14:13; 1 Cor. 8:9).

4. When it hurts a Christian’s testimony in the community and is therefore not to the glory of God (1 Cor. 10:31).

5. When there is any doubt in the Christian’s mind about it (Rom. 14:23).⁵

With all that said, abusing wine leads to debauchery. Debauchery, according to Webster’s online dictionary, refers to “bad or immoral behavior that involves sex, drugs, alcohol, etc.”⁶

However, when Paul commands Christians not to get drunk, he is probably not only addressing a social issue, but also a theological issue. In the ancient world, worshipers commonly sought communion with their gods through various forms of ecstasy. This was achieved in part through taking drugs, heavy drinking, dancing, singing, and sexual orgies. In fact, witchcraft, or sorcery, in Scripture is the Greek word pharmakeia, from which we get our English word “pharmacy”—a place to buy medicine.

Paul might have had in mind the worship of the Greek God, Dionysius (Bacchus in Rome)—the wine God.⁷ Festivals to Dionysius included drunken orgies and happened as often as five times a month.⁸ Paul may be referring to this as he calls the Ephesians to instead be “filled with the Spirit.” The Ephesians were not to worship the living God in the same way that pagans worshiped false gods, and neither should we.

With that said, believers should not just stay away from drunkenness and experimenting with drugs because they are morally wrong, but also because they open the doors to evil spirits—as experienced by those in cult religions. Scripture seems to affirm this in 1 Peter 5:8 (KJV). It says, “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.” To “be sober” means to be free of intoxicants. Believers should be free of intoxicants because these substances open doors to the devil.

When a person becomes intoxicated, he submits control of his mind and body to a drug. No doubt this lack of control opens doors for evil spirits. We should not be surprised that in the majority of rapes, robberies, and murders, the perpetrator is under the influence of drugs.

If a Christian is going to live a life of wisdom, he must not abuse alcohol or drugs.

Application Questions: What do you think about the belief that abusing drugs and alcohol opens doors for demons? What is your personal practice with the freedom of drinking? How can Christians wisely handle this freedom?

Believers Live a Life of Wisdom by Being Filled with the Spirit

Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Ephesians 5:18b-21)

Finally, if we are going to live wisely, we must be filled with the Spirit. The filling of the Spirit is a commonly misunderstood teaching; therefore, it might be helpful to first state what it is not.

Common Misunderstandings

Interpretation Question: What are some common misunderstandings of the filling of the Spirit?

1. To be filled with the Spirit is not a crazy, ecstatic experience that involves falling on the floor, shaking uncontrollably, or barking like a dog.

Scripture says one of the fruits of the Spirit is “self-control” (Galatians 5:23), and that the spirit of the prophets is subject to the prophets (1 Cor 14:32, KJV). This means when the Spirit of God moves in a person’s life, the person has self-control—not a lack of control. The Spirit-filled person is able to control his lust, language, and emotions.

In 1 Corinthians 12:3, Paul says that “no one who is speaking by the Spirit of God says, ‘Jesus be cursed,’ and no one can say, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ except by the Holy Spirit.” This needed to be said because the Corinthians were accepting many counterfeits in the church. They were probably so excited about power and charismatic gifts that they accepted everything without question. Paul says, “No, the Spirit of God won’t say Jesus is cursed.” In the same way, many churches today are so excited about the things of the Spirit that they lack discernment.

One of the tricks of the Anti-Christ in the end times will be “counterfeit miracles, signs, and wonders” (2 Thess 2:9). The enemy deceives people with these types of wonders even today. People in churches are barking like dogs, roaring like lions, falling down, shaking, and everything else. John commands believers to test the spirits to see if they are of God (1 John 4:1). We do this by the spirit’s fruit. One question we must ask is, “Does this ‘spirit’ produce self-control or lack of control?”

2. To be filled with the Spirit is not the same as the baptism of the Spirit.

Another common misunderstanding of the filling of the Spirit is confusing it with the baptism of the Spirit. When a person accepts Christ, the Spirit baptizes him into the body of Christ. First Corinthians 12:13 says that we have all been baptized by one Spirit into one body. It is a one-time experience whereby we become part of Christ’s body. Some believe the baptism is a second experience that believers must seek, and that it is commonly associated with speaking in tongues. However, again, 1 Corinthians 12:13 say that we have all been baptized by the Spirit, and verses 28-31 of the same chapter indicate that not everybody has the gift of tongues. Further evidence that we have all been baptized by the Spirit is the fact that Scripture never commands us to seek the baptism. If it were an important experience for all believers to pursue, wouldn’t there be at least one command for us to seek it? But, there isn’t.

Sadly, because the filling of the Spirit is commonly associated with the baptism of the Spirit in some circles, it has created two tiers of Christians—”Spirit-filled” and “unSpirit-filled.” In some churches, Christians who don’t speak in tongues are looked at as second class citizens. This is the opposite of what the baptism of the Spirit is meant to do. The baptism makes us one body—not two, and this incorrect theology divides what God unified.

Well then, we must ask, “What is the filling of the Spirit?”

Interpretation Question: What does it mean to be filled by the Spirit?

Whereas in the baptism of the Spirit we become part of the body of Christ, in the filling of the Spirit we offer our bodies to God. While the baptism of the Spirit is a one-time experience, the filling of the Spirit is to be a continual experience for believers. There is one baptism and multiple fillings. This is seen in the Greek tense of the word. It is a present imperative that can actually be translated “keep on being filled.” This verb is also passive—meaning “we do not fill ourselves but permit the Spirit to fill us.”⁹

Wiersbe’s comments on the word “filled” are helpful:

In the Bible, filled means “controlled by.” “They … were filled with wrath” (Luke 4:28) means “they were controlled by wrath” and for that reason tried to kill Jesus. “The Jews were filled with envy” (Acts 13:45) means that the Jews were controlled by envy and opposed the ministry of Paul and Barnabas. To be “filled with the Spirit” means to be constantly controlled by the Spirit in our mind, emotions, and will.¹⁰

The filling of the Spirit brings power in the Christian life to be holy, to witness, and to accomplish all God calls us to do. It should be the continual experience and endeavor of every believer. Believers should constantly seek this experience in their lives. If they don’t, they will produce little fruit for God’s kingdom.

How to Be Filled

Interpretation Question: How should believers seek the filling of the Spirit?

1. Believers are filled through yielding to the Spirit’s control.

Again, the word “fill” is passive, meaning that the Holy Spirit fills us. Therefore, in order for the Spirit to control us, we must yield to his will in our lives. We do this by obeying the commands in Scripture, heeding his promptings, and not grieving him through sin. If we commit sin, we must turn to God and confess it.

We must offer our bodies as living sacrifices unto God, as Romans 12:1 says. This is where many Christians fail. They continually hold back their best from God—not wanting to fully submit to him for fear of what he might say or where he might lead. As long as believers hold back from full obedience to God, they cannot be filled as they should be.

Are you yielding to the Spirit? Or are you holding back from full obedience?

2. Believers are filled through dwelling in the Word of God.

Consider what Colossians 3:16-18 says,

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.

It is hard not to notice the similarities with Ephesians 5:18-21. The results of being filled with the Spirit and letting the Word of Christ dwell in us richly are almost synonymous; they are worship, thanksgiving, and submitting to others.

Since the Spirit is the author of Scripture, to be filled by him means to dwell in the Word of God. The word “dwell” actually means “to be at home.” Many Christians can’t be filled and empowered by the Spirit because the Word of God is not “at home” in their lives. It is more like a visitor than a resident. They visit the Word of God on occasion. They say, “Maybe I’ll read the Bible today or maybe I won’t.” Therefore, they don’t have power in their lives, and they struggle with self-control, which is a fruit of the Spirit.

If we are going to be filled with the Spirit, we must dwell daily in the Word of God (Psalm 1:2-3). There the Spirit instructs and equips us for all righteousness (2 Tim 3:16-17).

3. Believers are filled through prayer.

In Acts 4:29-31, the church gathered to pray because of the persecution they experienced for preaching the gospel. The text shows their prayer and the result:

“Now, Lord, consider their threats and enable your servants to speak your word with great boldness. Stretch out your hand to heal and perform miraculous signs and wonders through the name of your holy servant Jesus.” After they prayed, the place where they were meeting was shaken. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and spoke the word of God boldly.

When they finished praying the place was shaken, and they were empowered by the Holy Spirit to speak the Word of God boldly. Instead of fearing the threats of men, they had spiritual power to continue God’s ministry.

How do we get filled and empowered by the Spirit of God? We get filled and empowered by having a thriving prayer life. Your ability to serve God, be holy, and have joy will often be proportionate to your time in prayer. One of the ways the Spirit fills us is through our prayers.

As we consider Acts 4, we must also see the importance of corporate prayer. Even Jesus, when confronted with the cross, threw a prayer meeting to get ready for it (Mark 14:34-42). We should do the same when encountering trials and temptations in our lives. It is one of the ways that God fills and empowers us.

4. Believers are filled through worship.

In 2 Kings 3:12-15, Elisha is approached by Jehoshaphat and Ahab, who were seeking God’s wisdom about going to war. Elisha responds, “‘But now bring me a harpist.’ While the harpist was playing, the hand of the LORD came upon Elisha.” Elisha is filled by God’s Spirit and empowered as he worships. It’s the same with us—God empowers us through worship. In another story, God routs the enemy while Jehoshaphat and his army worship (2 Chr 20).

The Bible says God inhabits the praises of his people (Psalm 22:3 paraphrase). Wherever there is true worship, God manifests his presence and empowers his people.

5. Believers are filled through faithfully enduring trials.

We get a picture of this with Christ in the wilderness. Matthew 4:1 says he was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. But Luke 4:13-14 says this about his leaving: “When the devil had finished all this tempting, he left him until an opportune time. Jesus returned to Galilee in the power of the Spirit, and news about him spread through the whole countryside.” When Christ left the wilderness after faithfully enduring temptation, he was empowered by the Spirit of God.

It is no surprise that the believers God used greatly in Scripture, he often sent first into the wilderness—trials—to be filled and empowered. Trials empty us of our self-reliance so we can fully rely on God’s strength. God said this to Paul about his thorn in the flesh in 2 Corinthians 12:9, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

God uses trials to weaken us so the power of his Spirit may be made perfect in us. With that said, some believers allow their trials to turn them away from God. Instead of running to him for strength and comfort, they run to something else like alcohol or other addictions. These people forfeit God’s power and give something or someone else control of their lives.

Are you drawing near God in your trial, or are you looking elsewhere for help? Your trial is strategic. It is there for God to empower and equip you for service.

Results

Observation Question: What are the results of being filled by the Spirit, according to Ephesians 5:19-21?

In conclusion, Paul shares the results of being filled with the Spirit. We would naturally think of being bold witnesses, miracles, prayer that moves mountains, healings, etc., but those manifestations aren’t listed in this passage. Instead, he says,

Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Ephesians 5:19-21 )

1. A result of being filled is corporate worship.

Paul said speak to one another with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs. MacDonald’s comments are helpful here:

While some see all three categories as parts of the Book of Psalms, we understand only psalms to mean the inspired writings of David, Asaph, and others. Hymns are noninspired songs which ascribe worship and praise directly to God. Spiritual songs are any other lyrical compositions dealing with spiritual themes, even though not addressed directly to God.¹¹

It must be noted that Paul says “speak to one another.” Corporate worship is focused on God, but it also involves speaking to and edifying one another. We commonly see this in the Psalms. Psalm 95:1-3 says:

Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD; let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation. Let us come before him with thanksgiving and extol him with music and song. For the LORD is the great God, the great King above all gods.

This reminds us that when we sing to God, it not only blesses him, but it also blesses others. As we raise our voices in worship, we speak to others about the greatness of God, and we edify them. Therefore, when we don’t sing, we rob others of this blessing. Some are certainly more gifted at singing than others, but Spirit-filled singing has nothing to do with being in tune or sounding good. It is with the heart that we honor God and edify others.

2. A result of being filled is individual worship.

Paul says to “make music in your heart to the Lord.” When filled with the Spirit, we find ourselves continually praising God—humming songs in our heart throughout the day. This is because the Spirit’s job is to glorify Christ and God (cf. John 16:14-15).

3. A result of being filled is thankfulness.

When a person is critical and complaining, they are not filled with the Spirit, but with the flesh (cf. Gal 5:19-21, Phil 2:14). When the Spirit fills us we give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for our lives (1 Thess 5:18).

4. A result of being filled is submission.

Instead of constantly seeking our own rights and our glory, we lay our rights down to serve and honor others as Christ did. Philippians 2:3 says, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.” This includes both submitting to those in authority over us, and also to those under our authority. When Christ washed the feet of his disciples, he essentially submitted to them as a servant. That is why the disciples were so shocked and Peter at first refused this ministry (John 13). Like Christ, we must humbly submit to others, even those who submit to us.

Finally, in considering these results, we must understand that some commentators believe they are not just results, but also means of being filled with the Spirit.¹² Certainly, they are both. When we worship individually and corporately, we are filled with God’s Spirit, even as Elisha was empowered as the harpist played worship music. When we are thankful, we are filled with the Spirit. But when we complain, we “put out the Spirit’s fire” (1 Thess 5:18-19). When we submit to one another God fills us, but when we are selfish and prideful, we lose his filling.

As believers, we must constantly be aware of the Spirit’s filling, for we need it to worship, to be thankful, to submit to God and others, and ultimately to accomplish everything God commands of us.

Application Questions: How have you experienced the filling of the Spirit? Are believers conscious of this experience or not conscious of it? How is God calling you to continually seek it?

Conclusion

How can believers live a life of wisdom that honors God, instead of a foolish life that dishonors him?

Believers live a life of wisdom by making the most of their time.
Believers live a life of wisdom by understanding God’s will.
Believers live a life of wisdom by staying sober.
Believers live a life of wisdom by being filled with the Spirit.

Scripture quotations marked KJV or AKJV are from the King James Version or Authorized (King James) Version of the Bible.

All emphases in Scripture quotations and commentators’ quotations have been added.

¹ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 222). Chicago: Moody Press.

² Stott, J. R. W. (1979). God’s new society: the message of Ephesians (p. 202). Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press.

³ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 223). Chicago: Moody Press.

⁴ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 223). Chicago: Moody Press.

⁵ MacDonald, W. (1995). Believer’s Bible Commentary: Old and New Testaments. (A. Farstad, Ed.) (p. 1944). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

⁶ Accessed10/3/2015 from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/debauchery

⁷ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 233). Chicago: Moody Press.

⁸ Accessed 10/3//2015 from http://global.britannica.com/topic/Bacchanalia

⁹ Wiersbe, W. W. (1996). The Bible exposition commentary (Vol. 2, p. 48). Wheaton, IL: Victor Books.

¹⁰ Wiersbe, W. W. (1996). The Bible exposition commentary (Vol. 2, p. 48). Wheaton, IL: Victor Books.

¹¹ MacDonald, W. (1995). Believer’s Bible Commentary: Old and New Testaments. (A. Farstad, Ed.) (p. 1946). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

¹² Evans, Tony (2009-01-01). Free at Last: Experiencing True Freedom Through Your Identity in Christ (Kindle Locations 1817-1819). Moody Publishers. Kindle Edition.

19. Characteristics of a Spirit-filled Marriage

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Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:22-33)

What are characteristics of a Spirit-filled marriage?

In Ephesians 5:18, Paul commands the Ephesians to be filled with the Spirit. This means to be controlled and empowered by the Spirit of God. This is a command for all believers of all ages. What God has called us to, he equips us for by his Spirit. This happens as we yield in obedience to God, as we abide in his Word (Col 3:16), and as we worship.

Then in Ephesians 5:19-21, he gives both results and means of being filled. We are filled as we worship singing Psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs to the Lord. We are filled as we give thanks to God in everything. And finally, we are filled as we submit to one another. Submission “(hupotassō) ‘means to relinquish one’s rights’… submission is to be a voluntary response to God’s will in giving up one’s independent rights to other believers in general and to ordained authority in particular—in this case the wife’s own husband.”¹ We will see this Spirit-filled submission in several ways throughout the rest of the book. Wives are called to submit to their husbands, children to their parents, and slaves to their masters. Worship, gratitude, and submission lead to being filled with the Spirit and are at the same time results of this filling.

Therefore, in this text, we are introduced to characteristics of a Spirit-filled marriage. When couples are walking in the Spirit and being controlled by him, they will see wonderful fruits in marriage. With that said, we should understand how radical this message was to the Ephesians. Pagan marriages and families in general were in shambles. Kent Hughes shares this about marriage in the pagan world:

Demosthenes [a prominent Greek statesman and orator] said, “We have courtesans [prostitutes] for the sake of pleasure; we have concubines for the sake of daily cohabitation; we have wives for the purpose of having children legitimately, and of having a faithful guardian for all our household affairs.” Xenophon [a Greek historian] said it was the husband’s aim that a wife “might see as little as possible, hear as little as possible and ask as little as possible.” Similarly Socrates said, “Is there anyone to whom you entrust more serious matters than to your wife — and is there anyone to whom you talk less?” The ancient pagan man breathed adultery. The marriage bond was virtually meaningless. It was better with the Jews, of course, except that the ultra-liberal and very popular school of Hillel allowed a man to divorce his wife for virtually anything — like putting too much salt in his food or becoming less attractive in his eyes.²

Marriage was broken in the pagan world, and Paul calls for the Ephesians to restore it by returning to God’s original design for marriage.

It is not much better in our society, where around fifty percent of marriages end in divorce. In fact, this institution is so pitiful in our society that many couples refuse to marry, choosing to simply live together. Others prefer open relationships without any promise of commitment.

How can we have the kind of marriages God originally planned for mankind? In order to fix what is broken, God gave us his Spirit, and when we are being filled with the Spirit, we will see much fruit in marriage. In this study, we will consider three characteristics of a Spirit-filled marriage.

Big Questions: What does a Spirit-filled marriage look like? How does the Spirit’s filling affect the wife and the husband, according to Ephesians 5:22-33?

In a Spirit-filled Marriage, the Wife Submits to Her Husband

Paul says, “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.” Unfortunately, “submission” carries a nasty connotation in our society, but it must be noted that this word does not mean “inferiority.” “Submit” is actually a military word that means “to arrange under rank”³ and to “come up under.” A sergeant is not inferior to a captain. They are equal. However, authority is necessary to maintain order in the military. Otherwise, there will be chaos. In the same way, God made the husband and wife relationship with order and authority so that it would function properly.

What’s interesting in this passage is that Paul gives the wife reasons to submit. Since God is our sovereign he does not have to give reasons, but here in this text, he does.

Observation Questions: What reasons does Paul give for the wife submitting to her husband? How is this reflected in the rest of Scripture?

1. The wife must submit to her husband because it is her duty to Christ.

The command, “Wives submit to your husbands as to the Lord,” means that this is part of the Christian wife’s duty to Christ. When she submits to her husband, she is submitting to Christ.

Submission is really an obedience issue to God. It has nothing to do with the husband’s ability to lead, or with his IQ. Many wives are more fit to lead than their husbands in terms of worldly qualifications. The submission of the wife has everything to do with God.

This should make a single woman more cautious when considering whom to marry. She must ask herself, “Is this somebody I am willing to submit to spiritually, financially, socially, and in every other area of life?” Whom a woman marries is the second most important decision of her life, after choosing to follow Christ. This decision should not just be made emotionally; it must also be very practical.

The command also speaks to single men considering marriage. They must ask themselves, “Is the woman I’m considering faithfully submitting to Christ?” If she does not submit to the greater, neither will she submit to the lesser.

The wife must submit to her husband because it is her duty in following Christ.

2. The wife must submit to her husband because he is her head.

What does Paul mean by the term “head”? If we say that someone is the head of a company or an organization, it means he is the authority. Similarly, the husband is the head of the wife.

Interpretation Question: Is Paul’s teaching of the headship of the husband over the wife cultural, or timeless (relevant for all times)?

Trinitarian Argument

Some say that Paul’s reference to the man’s headship was just cultural with no applications for today, but this is not true. Many Scriptures teach the man’s position of authority as a universal concept—most notably 1 Corinthians 11:3, 1 Timothy 2:11-13, and the creation narrative in Genesis 2.

In 1 Corinthians 11:3, Paul describes the headship of man over the wife by comparing them to Christ and God. He says, “Now I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.” When God made Adam and Eve, he made them in his image and also one flesh—one body (Gen 2:24). But there is order in the body. The head leads the rest of the members. Paul says the headship of man over the wife is analogous to the headship of God over Christ. In the analogy, the woman pictures Christ, who is co-equal to God the Father, but submits to him. When God made man and woman in his image, he made the relationship to operate in perfect love and perfect submission as seen in the Trinity.

Order of Creation Argument

Similarly, in 1 Timothy 2:11-13, Paul states that women should not have the role of teacher over men (probably referring to the elder/pastor role, cf. 1 Tim 3:1-7, Titus 1:6-9). Here he does not make a cultural argument, but a creation one. Consider the text: “A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. For Adam was formed first, then Eve.”

Paul tells us that the roles established in the New Testament do not stem from the fall or culture; they reflect the way God created man and woman in the Garden of Eden. The creation of Adam before Eve was significant. It meant that he was her head. She was made from his side to be his helper in ruling and subduing the world for God.

Adam Naming Eve

Further evidence of the husband’s leadership role is seen in Adam naming his wife. Before creating Eve, God paraded all the animals before Adam and told him to name them (Genesis 2). This naming represented Adam’s authority over the animals. Right after God created Eve from Adam’s rib, Adam then named her “woman.” After the fall, he named her “Eve” (Genesis 3). Again, this demonstrates Adam’s headship over Eve. Naming has the same significance in our society.

The woman must submit to her husband not just because God commands, but because God made the husband to be the head of the wife. A home where the wife does not submit to her husband is like an arm that will not submit to its head. God made order in the body, and he made it in the home.

3. Wives must submit to their husbands because marriage symbolizes Christ’s relationship to the church.

Paul says, “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.” (Eph 5:23) In the same way the church submits to Christ, the wife is called to submit to her husband. From creation, God made marriage to model the present reality of Christ and the church. Paul deals further with this analog later in the text, calling it a “profound mystery” in Ephesians 5:32.

It is easy to understand the analogy of the husband being the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. But, how is the man the wife’s savior? David Guzik’s comments about Lloyd-Jones’ views on this text are helpful:

Lloyd-Jones thinks Paul used the wider understanding of the word Savior, which can simply mean preserver. 1 Timothy 4:10 speaks of Jesus being the Savior of all men, especially of those who believe. How can Jesus be the Savior of all men? In the sense that He preserves all men and blesses all men with good things from heaven above. It is in this way that husbands are to be their wife’s savior… “What, then, is the doctrine? It is clearly this. The wife is the one who is kept, preserved, guarded, shielded, provided for by the husband.⁴

This is the third reason that the wife should submit to her husband—he is her savior in the sense that he guards, protects, and provides for her, even as Christ does his church. A Christian marriage is called to be a gospel message that evangelizes everyone around. The husband sacrificially loves his wife like Christ, and she submits to him like the church. The union itself is meant to model and glorify God.

But believers are not just called to model God in a good marriage, but even in a bad marriage. God commanded Hosea to marry a woman that would eventually cheat on him. After she did so, God commanded Hosea to take her back, just as Israel cheated on God and God took her back.

This teaches us that a Christian marriage is more about God and his glory than our own happiness, and when we understand this, it should radically change how we act in marriage. We should continually ask ourselves, “Are my actions reflecting God’s forgiveness, patience, and love?” “Am I honoring God through my actions?” There is a sense in which we cannot control the actions of our spouse, but we can control how we respond to those actions. We must bring every thought and response before the litmus test of God’s Word and his character. Lord, we are here to glorify you. Our life is not about our happiness, but about your happiness. Lord, help us be faithful reflections of you.

Interpretation Question: What is the extent of the wife’s submission?

In Ephesians 5:24, Paul says, “Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” Essentially, the extent of the woman’s submission is “in everything.”

However, “in everything” must be qualified by his original command, “Wives submit to your husbands as to the Lord” (v. 23). The wife must not do anything that would dishonor God. If the husband commands her to lie on taxes, she must refuse. If he commands her not to go to church, read her Bible, or worship, she must refuse. Her first priority is to follow God. And following God should ultimately make her a better wife to her husband.

This principle is very important, especially when it comes to arguments and fighting. The woman is not to be a doormat. She is made in the image of God and her input is important and valuable; a godly husband will recognize and cherish this reality. However, when the husband asks her to do something that is not sinful, she should submit. Yes, it may seem foolish. In such cases she should respectfully make her opinion known and pray for her husband, but ultimately she must submit to him, trusting God to work in his life. This also includes situations where a believing wife is married to an unbeliever. First Peter 3:1-2 says:

Now, both the husband and wife are called to submit to Christ as Lord. When this happens in a marriage, typically the husband and wife will at some point be on the same page about decisions. Agreement may come in stages, and couples must be patient and prayerful as they wait. In fact, this is part of God’s sanctification process in couples as they seek him together to discern his will.

Application Questions: Why is the submission of the wife to her husband so important? What are some common reactions to this teaching in society and often in the church? How should a single woman apply this principle in seeking a future mate?

In a Spirit-filled Marriage, the Husband Loves His Wife

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. (Ephesians 5:25-32)

What about the role of the husband? First, let us notice God does not call the husband to make the wife submit to him. Submission must be voluntary. The abuse of wives by husbands seen throughout the ages is not God’s will. It is a result of the curse. In Genesis 3:16, one of the results of the curse was that the woman would desire her husband (meaning desire to control him), and the husband would rule over his wife (an oppressive, forceful rule). However, Christ came to restore God’s original design for marriage, and he gives us his Spirit to equip us for this.

Paul calls for the husband to love his wife. He uses the word agape, which is often used of God’s love. This is not an emotional love; it is an act of the will. Believers are called to agape their enemies (Matt 5:44). And if this is possible, husbands can certainly agape their wives no matter the situation. I really struggle when Christian husbands or wives tell me they just don’t “feel” like they “love” their spouse any more. In response, I say, “What does feelings have to do with it? God commanded you to love your spouse. He commands it and empowers it (cf. Rom 5:5, Gal 5:22). This is an obedience issue, not a feeling issue.”

With that said, it should be remembered that in the ancient world Paul’s command was pretty radical. Husbands had very little regard for their wives, and the idea of loving them would have sounded ridiculous.

In the Jewish and Greek cultures, the woman had few to no rights. She was a piece of property meant to serve her husband. Paul’s teaching that the husband was to love his wife as Christ loves the church was profoundly counter-cultural.

It must be remembered that the husband is given an impossible standard here. No one can love just like Christ. This means that no husband will ever be able to say, “I made it!” nor should he feel satisfied with the love he shows his wife. Every husband falls woefully short of this impossible standard, but he must continually seek to reach it.

Interpretation Question: What characteristics of the husband’s love can be discerned from Ephesians 5:25–28?

1. The husband’s love must be realistic.

The man should have no unrealistic fantasies about the woman he married. Christ loved the church and died for her while she was still a sinner and an enemy of God (Rom. 5:8). Christ knew she was sinful and disobedient. Yet, he still gave his life for her while knowing her faults. His love was realistic.

In marriage, both partners should understand this reality. In fact, much of pre–marital counseling consists of destroying the false expectations set up by romantic comedies and other Hollywood productions. The husband must love realistically; his wife has been infected by sin just as he has. She must be reformed daily by God’s grace, and she must be loved despite her faults. Scripture says, “Love covers over a multitude of sins” (1 Peter 4:8). However, a realistic love is important for both partners to prevent disillusionment. I have no doubt that the reason the highest number of divorces happen in the first year of marriage is because most romantic love is unrealistic.

2. The husband’s love must be sacrificial.

The husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the church, and thus be willing to die for her. If anyone feels that the wife’s role is unfair, they should give more thought to that of the husband. Surely it is much easier to submit to someone than to give one’s life for that person. Indeed, such love is impossible without the grace of God.

To love sacrificially means the husband must at times forgo his free time, entertainment, friendships, and sometimes even career in order to love his wife. It is sad to see how many husbands, because of their careers, are not even home to love their wives or their children.

3. The husband’s love must be sanctifying.

Christ’s love makes the church holy by cleansing her with the Word; his purpose is to make her the perfect bride. Similarly, the husband must help and encourage his wife to learn Scripture, and to get involved in a Bible-believing church and with small groups and ministries where she can grow and serve. He must help her cultivate not only her character but also her calling so she can fulfill God’s plans for her life.

He must discern her gifts and talents, and encourage her to use them for the glory of God. This love may also mean admonishing his wife through the Word at times so that she might know and serve Christ better. It is a sanctifying love. Before getting married, every man should consider whether he is ready and willing to love a woman this way. Is he ready to be a spiritual leader?

4. The husband’s love must be humble.

The phrase “washing with water” (Eph 5:26) seems to picture the job of a servant. It may specifically reflect Christ washing the feet of his disciples—the job of a slave, or the lowest ranking person in a house (John 13). Christ humbles himself and cleans his disciples. This is also the job of the husband. Though he is the head, he does not use his position to dominate or command his wife, but to humbly serve her. He must continually be concerned about her emotional, physical, social, and spiritual needs, and work to meet them. The husband’s love must be humble and serving.

5. The husband’s love must be personal.

He must love her as his own body. Ephesians 5:28 says, “In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” David Guzik says this about Paul’s command:

The single word as is important. Paul did not say, “So ought men to love their wives in the same way as they love their bodies.” That would be an improvement in many cases, but that is not the meaning. The meaning is, “So ought men to love their wives because they are their own bodies.” … A man must love his wife as he would his body, as a part of himself. As Eve was a part of Adam, taken out of his side, so the wife is to the man because she is a part of him.⁵

Martyn Lloyd-Jones adds:

The husband must realize that his wife is a part of himself. He will not feel this instinctively; he has to be taught it; and the Bible in all its parts teaches it. In other words, the husband must understand that he and his wife are not two: they are one.⁶

In fact, it seems as though Paul is appealing to man’s selfish nature when he says, “He who loves his wife loves himself” (v. 28). In reality, this is a motivation that many of us men need. When we love our wives, we actually bless ourselves. And when we don’t, it hurts us. Like a person who neglects a fractured leg and ends up being crippled by it, a husband who does not minister to his wife hurts himself both at the time and over the long term.

The husband’s love must be realistic, sacrificial, sanctifying, humble, and personal. Husbands must love their wives and take time daily to cultivate a Christ-centered home.

Application Questions: Which aspects of the husband’s love do you find most challenging, and why? For singles, how will you apply these principles in your preparation for marriage?

In a Spirit-filled Marriage, the Husband and Wife Meet Each Other’s Deepest Need

However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:33)

Interpretation Questions: Why does Paul focus on the husband’s need for respect and the wife’s need for love? Don’t they both need love and respect?

Finally, Paul gives a summary statement of the husband’s and wife’s duties: The husband must love his wife and the wife must respect her husband. To respect her husband means to esteem and honor him, even when he doesn’t deserve it.

It’s interesting that Paul doesn’t call the woman to love her husband. It’s certainly assumed, but respect is the chief thing a man needs. If a wife talks down to her husband, she cuts him down at his place of greatest need. In the same way, when a husband doesn’t love his wife, when he doesn’t speak words of encouragement and make sacrifices for her, he cuts her down at her place of greatest need. The woman needs love and the man needs respect. When the house is out of order, they deprive one another of these blessings.

Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, in his book Love and Respect, cites research showing that when husbands and wives are in conflict, 83% of the men feel disrespected and 70% of the women feel unloved. This seems to support the necessity of a husband demonstrating love for his wife, and the need for a wife to always respect her husband.⁷

In a Spirit-filled marriage, the wife certainly loves her husband and the husband respects his wife, but they also meet each other’s core needs in a special way. Wives especially need love and husbands especially need respect. Scripture seems to emphasize this and so does research.

Application Questions: Do you think there is a major difference in the psychology of men and women with respect to their needs for love and respect? If not, why not? If so, in what way have you seen or experienced this difference?

Conclusion

As we consider the characteristics of a Spirit-filled marriage, we must remember that they come only through a work of God. A marriage needs God to function correctly—it needs the Spirit of God to empower both partners.

Marriage has often been compared to a triangle with God at the peak and the husband and the wife on the sides. As the husband and the wife get closer to God, they get closer to one another. As we abide in the Spirit through prayer, time in the Word, and fellowship, the fruits of the Spirit are born in our marriages.

What are characteristics of a Spirit-filled marriage?

In a Spirit-filled marriage, the wife submits to her husband.
In a Spirit-filled marriage, the husband loves his wife.
In a Spirit-filled marriage, the husband and wife meet each other’s deepest needs.

Scripture quotations marked KJV or AKJV are from the King James Version or Authorized (King James) Version of the Bible.

All emphases in Scripture quotations and commentators’ quotations have been added.

¹ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 280). Chicago: Moody Press.

² Hughes, R. K. (1990). Ephesians: the mystery of the body of Christ (p. 190). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

³ W. W. Wiersbe, The Bible Exposition Commentary. (Wheaton, IL: Victor Books, 1996).

⁴ Guzik, David (2012-11-26). Galatians and Ephesians (Kindle Locations 5895-5896). Enduring Word Media. Kindle Edition.

⁵ Guzik, David (2012-11-26). Galatians and Ephesians (Kindle Locations 6140-6146). Enduring Word Media. Kindle Edition.

⁶ Guzik, David (2012-11-26). Galatians and Ephesians (Kindle Locations 6150-6152). Enduring Word Media. Kindle Edition.

⁷ Accessed 8/15/16 from http://loveandrespect.com/

20. Characteristics of a Spirit-filled Home

Related Media

Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. (Ephesians 6:1-4)

What are characteristics of a Spirit-filled home, as seen in the relationship between parents and children?

In Ephesians 6:1-4, Paul gives instructions to children and parents. Since the word “fathers” in verse 4 can be translated as “parents,” in this study we will address both parents.

It must be remembered that this passage is connected to Ephesians 5:18, where Paul calls the Ephesians to be filled with the Spirit. To be “filled” means to be empowered and controlled by the Spirit of God. In Ephesians 5:19-22, he gives the results of the Spirit’s filling. Believers worship, give thanks, and submit to one another out of reverence to Christ. Paul then talks about the Spirit-filled relationship between a husband and wife, and then between children and parents.

In a Spirit-filled home, children obey their parents, and parents raise their children in the Lord and do not exasperate them. If this is true of a Spirit-filled home, then in a worldly home, children are disobedient and parents neglect training them in the Lord.

Romans 1 describes the results of society denying God, and one of them is disobedient children (v. 30). Furthermore, Isaiah describes how in a society under God’s judgment, children rule and oppress the people. Isaiah 3:12-13 says, “Youths oppress my people, women rule over them. O my people, your guides lead you astray; they turn you from the path. The LORD takes his place in court; he rises to judge the people.”

Sadly, this is happening all over the world. The Duke of Windsor once quipped, “The thing that impresses me most about America is the way parents obey their children.”¹ Instead of children submitting to their parents, parents often do whatever it takes to make children happy, even to their demise. In many places, youth run wild and people are scared to walk the streets because of theft, murder, and gang violence.

In many families there is oppression by either the parents or the children, instead of love and obedience to God’s Word. John MacArthur shares a quote from the Minnesota Crime Commission, which demonstrates the truthfulness of Scripture on this topic:

Every baby starts life as a little savage. He is completely selfish and self–centered. He wants what he wants when he wants it: his bottle, his mother’s attention, his playmate’s toys, his uncle’s watch, or whatever. Deny him these and he seethes with rage and aggressiveness which would be murderous were he not so helpless. He’s dirty, he has no morals, no knowledge, no developed skills. This means that all children, not just certain children but all children, are born delinquent. If permitted to continue in their self–centered world of infancy, given free reign to their impulsive actions to satisfy each want, every child would grow up a criminal, a thief, a killer, a rapist.²

Every child is infested with a sin nature, and if not trained, he or she will live a life of rebellion towards parents, God, and ultimately all authority. Children are a blessing, but they need godly instruction and ultimately the new birth.

Parents need Spirit empowerment to train their children, and children need Spirit empowerment to obey and honor their parents. In this study, we will consider characteristics of a Spirit-filled home.

Big Question: What characteristics of a Spirit-filled home can be discerned from Ephesians 6:1-4?

In a Spirit-filled Home, Children Obey and Honor Their Parents

Interpretation Question: Who is Paul referring to when he says “children”?

When Paul commands “children” to obey and honor their parents, he is not only referring to small children; tekna (children) is a general term referring to all offspring.³ Biblically, it denotes those who are unmarried and still financially dependent on their parents. Genesis 2:24 says this about the marriage relationship: “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” God must still come first, but then the wife must be devoted to her husband and the husband to his wife. Obedience to parents is no longer the priority.

However, the responsibility to honor parents, which at times includes obedience, never changes. Obedience refers primarily to our actions and honor refers primarily to our attitude. We should always honor our parents, even if we are no longer under their supervision.

Sadly, aging parents are often not honored in our culture. They are seen as a burden instead of a blessing, and are often neglected. Conversely, Scripture teaches that sons and daughters owe parents and grandparents special honor when they age and cannot provide for themselves. First Timothy 5:4 and 8 says,

But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God… If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.

Now this teaching would have been especially hard for children in the ancient culture of Ephesus to receive. Many held a deep animosity towards their father. The patriarch of the family held unlimited power and was typically excessively strict. He owned all the property, and even adult children could not own anything in their own name until he died. Even a forty-five-year-old senator could not own property if his father was still alive.⁴ This unlimited power commonly resulted in lording over the children and creating a deep animosity within them. Sometimes this anger even resulted in patricide, for which Romans reserved one of their worst punishments—being stripped, whipped, and drowned in a bag, along with live animals to scratch at the flesh.⁵

In Ephesians 6:1, Paul says, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord.” In this text, we can discern how they are to obey their parents. “The Greek word translated ‘obey’ is very helpful because it comes from two words, under and to listen — so that it literally means to listen under.”⁶ From this we can learn two qualities of the child’s obedience.

Observation Question: How are children to obey and honor their parents?

1. In order to obey their parents, children must listen to them.

The book of Proverbs is primarily about a father teaching his son wisdom. He constantly calls the child to listen and to hear. Proverbs 4:10 says, “Listen, my son, accept what I say, and the years of your life will be many.”

In the same way, children should listen to their parents. Parents are not perfect, but they have lived more years than their children. Even adult children should constantly seek the advice and wisdom of their parents, for it will bless their souls.

2. In order to obey their parents, children must submit to them.

To “listen under” has the connotation of submitting to authority and responding positively when spoken to. Often this is not the normal reaction of children. Instead of responding positively to parental instruction, children tend to respond negatively because they want their own way.

As long as children are under their parents’ authority, they must recognize that this authority is God-given. Romans 13:1 says there is no authority but that which comes from God.

A powerful story of submitting to parental authority comes from the life of Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones. While in college, Martyn Lloyd-Jones felt a call to pastoral ministry; however, his parents really wanted him to be a doctor. After praying about the matter, he felt that he should first become a doctor to honor his parents and then become a pastor in obedience to God. And he did. He became one of the top doctors in his field, and then left the medical field to go to seminary and became one of the most well-known pastors in history.

3. In order to obey their parents, children must be faithful to the Lord.

The command for children to obey their parents “in the Lord” has several implications.

First, it means children must submit to their parents as their duty to God; it is one of the ways they obey and honor God.
Second, children must cultivate their relationship with God (and be filled with the Spirit) in order to obey their parents.

We see children cultivating a deep relationship with God throughout the Scriptures. Samuel came to know God at a very young age. God spoke to him and he replied, “Speak, for your servant listens” (1 Sam 3:10b). Similarly, David, though marginalized by his parents for his age, had a deep relationship with God, and God used him at a young age. God enabled him to kill a lion and a bear, and one day God used him to defeat Israel’s enemy, Goliath. In order to faithfully obey, especially when things are difficult with parents, children must cultivate their relationship with God and be filled with the Spirit.

Finally, it describes the sphere of children’s obedience.

Children should obey their parents in everything except when their parents tell them to disobey God. If their parents tell them to lie, steal, or cheat, they should disobey because their allegiance is to God first.

Application Questions: What type of relationship did/do you have with your parents? As a child, were you generally obedient or disobedient, and why? How does this relationship affect you today?

In a Spirit-filled Home, Children Understand the Importance of Obeying and Honoring Their Parents

In a Spirit-filled home, children don’t just obey because they have to—they also understand why. When Paul says, “for this is right,” he begins to lay reasons for obedience and honor. This also is an important parenting practice. Often children ask the question, “Why?” after being told to do something by their parents. And often the response is, “Because I told you so.” There is a place for this, but if it’s the primary way parents respond to their children, it’s not healthy. Children need to understand why in order to learn to make wise decisions on their own.

Like a wise parent, Paul explains why children should obey and honor their parents.

Observation Question: What reasons does Paul give children for obeying and honoring their parents in Ephesians 6:1-3?

1. Children should obey and honor their parents because it is ethical.

The first reason Paul gives is simply because it is right. “Dikaios (right) refers to that which is correct, just, righteous—to that which is exactly as it should be.”⁷ This is the way God meant for families to function, and therefore it is righteous and pleasing to him.

If children want to please their heavenly Father, they must obey their parents. It doesn’t matter how mean, rude, or unspiritual the parents are. What matters is obeying and pleasing God.

2. Children should obey and honor their parents because it brings prosperity.

Next, Paul quotes the fifth commandment in Exodus 20:12. He says, “‘Honor your father and mother’—which is the first commandment with a promise— ‘that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.’”

In this commandment, God promised Israel that it would go well with a child who obeyed his parents. Even though we are not under Old Testament law (cf. Rom 6:14), the fact that Paul repeats this in the New Testament means that this promise is still true for us today.

God promises to bless the life of a child who obeys his parents. Certainly, we can see this happening around us: An obedient child develops healthy patterns and character traits like honesty, hard work, and generosity that often lead to a prosperous life. His integrity and diligence lead to blessing from teachers, employers, spouses, and ultimately God.

In contrast, a child that rebels against his parents will rebel against teachers, bosses, and ultimately every other authority, including God. This leads to pain. Commonly, rebellious children get caught up in hazardous practices like alcohol and drug abuse and dishonest dealings, which will affect them for the rest of their lives. They will constantly deal with the consequences of their sins and ultimately God’s discipline.

Interpretation Question: In what way is this “the first commandment with a promise, as Paul says?

Pastor Steve Cole’s comments are helpful here. He says,

But, Paul’s comment, that this is “the first commandment with a promise,” is a bit puzzling. Scholars point out that the second commandment, not to make any idols, promises that God will show lovingkindness to those who love Him and keep His commands (Exod. 20:4-6). But, as Calvin explains (The Institutes of the Christian Religion [Westminster Press], ed. by John McNeill, 2:8:37), that promise was not confined to that particular command, but extends to the whole law. So the promise attached to the fifth commandment was the first specific promise among the ten and the first of many promised blessings for obedience.⁸

3. Children should obey and honor their parents because it promotes a long life.

Now, when God promises a long life to Israel and the church for obedience to parents, this probably refers to a full life—however long God planned for a person to live. It must be remembered that God has an allotted amount of time for each believer on the earth. As David says in Psalm 139:16, “your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” God ordained all the days of David before he was born.

However, some experience untimely deaths because of their disobedience. This is seen with Ananias and Sapphira (Acts 5:5-10), and certain members of the church at Corinth (1 Cor 11:30).⁹ Today lack of respect for authorities, substance abuse, and crime shorten lives, as the disobedience perpetuated in childhood continues into adulthood.

Obeying and honoring parents is so important that in the Old Covenant, God commanded that a child who struck or cursed his parents be put to death (Ex 21:15, 17; Lev 20:9). To physically or verbally abuse a parent was a capital offense because this type of behavior would not only dishonor the parents and God, but ultimately destroy society. A society where children rule is a society under God’s curse and is headed for destruction (cf. Is 3:11-12).

Application Questions: What are your thoughts about God’s promise of prosperity and long life to obedient children, and the lack of these blessings for the rebellious? How have you seen this promise play out in your life or the lives of others?

In a Spirit-filled Home, Parents Do Not Exasperate Their Children

Fathers, do not exasperate your children (Ephesians 6:4)

The next aspect of a Spirit-filled home is that parents do not exasperate their children—provoking them to anger and rebellion.

Pateres, the Greek word Paul uses here, typically referred to male parents but at times referred to parents in general. We see it used this way in Hebrews 11:23, when referring to Moses’ parents. Since Paul calls for children to obey both parents in the previous three verses, he is most likely still referring to both parents in this verse.¹⁰

With that said, the father was the most dominant figure in the home and the one most likely to exasperate the children, or provoke them to wrath. Certainly, mothers did this as well, but fathers were more inclined to it.

MacArthur shares why the father’s love would be hard to even imagine in this ancient context.

By the Roman law of patria potestas a father had virtual life and death power not only over his slaves but over his entire household. He could cast any of them out of the house, sell them as slaves, or even kill them—and be accountable to no one. A newborn child was placed at its father’s feet to determine its fate. If the father picked it up, the child was allowed to stay in the home; if the father walked away, it was simply disposed of—much as aborted babies are in our own day. Discarded infants who were healthy and vigorous were collected and taken each night to the town forum, where they would be picked up and raised to be slaves or prostitutes.¹¹

As we consider this command, we must ask, “How do parents provoke their children to wrath?”

By understanding how this happens, parents can avoid it.

Interpretation Question: How do parents exasperate their children, or provoke them to wrath?

1. Parents exasperate their children by not disciplining them.

This is one of the quickest ways to develop bitter children. A spoiled child is a thankless and bitter child. Because they get their way all the time, they are bitter whenever any authority does not submit to them or when life becomes difficult. Solomon said, “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him” (Prov. 22:15).

Parents embitter their children by never driving the foolishness—the sin—out of their hearts through good discipline. Parents who do not discipline their children but instead give them everything they want often become surprised when the children eventually rebel later in life. These spoiled kids want nothing to do with their parents. Sadly, this happens too much, even in the church.

2. Parents exasperate their children by abusing them, or applying improper discipline.

Verbal and physical abuse sow seeds of anger—and even hatred—into children’s hearts. Such anger is difficult to overcome, and often results in these children abusing others.

However, this happens not only as a result of abuse, but also because of improper discipline. Parents who do not manage their anger wisely train their children to react in the same manner. A parent who curses, criticizes, or even harshly disciplines a child—even if the punishment is just—teaches him that cursing, uncontrolled hitting, and “going crazy” are acceptable ways to express anger. This child does not learn how to manage his anger, and therefore struggles with it throughout his life. He grows up doing what he has been trained to do—fight others, and hold grudges against those he feels failed him.

Listen parents, telling your children to go to their rooms while you are angry can be a wise tactic. It gives you a chance to evaluate their sin, their motives, and your own heart. It allows you to teach them how to respond to anger, and it also allows you to discipline them appropriately.

3. Parents exasperate their children by neglecting them.

Many children lack love and affection because of parental neglect and therefore grow bitter. Some parents neglect their children for work; they put in long hours to achieve secular success, but this pursuit keeps them away from home. Ultimately, this hurts children both emotionally and spiritually.

Sadly, many parents in our society neglect their children by sending them away to extensive education programs often to compensate for their lack of being around. However, it is not God’s will for teachers, coaches, or babysitters to raise children. That is why he gave them parents. These people certainly play a role, but it is important for parents to be the primary influence on their children’s lives.

We see the tragic consequences of neglect in the account of David and his son Absalom. When one of David’s sons raped his half-sister, David did nothing. When Absalom killed the rapist, David did nothing. When Absalom ran away from the kingdom, David did nothing. When Absalom came back after murdering his brother, David refused to see him. This neglect created such anger in Absalom that he eventually usurped his father’s authority in the kingdom and essentially tried to kill him. David neither disciplined Absalom nor encouraged him to make right choices, with drastic and far-reaching consequences.

Many children have tremendous anger at a father or mother who neglected them. Parents, do not embitter your children. Prioritize them over your work, your church, your entertainment, and your social life. Let only God and your spouse come before them.

4. Parents exasperate their children by never encouraging them and showing them affection.

We see this in the story of Martin Luther, whose father never encouraged him or showed him love. Listen to what commentator William Barclay said:

It is one of the tragic facts of religious history that Martin Luther’s father was so stern to him that, all his life, Luther found it difﬁcult to pray: ‘Our Father.’ The word father in his mind represented nothing but severity. The duty of the parent is discipline, but it is also encouragement. Luther himself said: ‘Spare the rod and spoil the child. It is true. But beside the rod keep an apple to give him when he does well.’¹²

Healthy parents not only discipline their children, but also reward them. As they reward their children when they do well and discipline them when they do wrong, children learn fairness by this balanced approach.

5. Parents exasperate their children by showing favoritism toward other siblings.

We get a good picture of this in the story of Jacob and Joseph. Jacob gave Joseph a robe of many colors, showing his favor of this son above the other eleven. In anger, the embittered older siblings later kidnapped Joseph and sold him into slavery.

How often do siblings become embittered against one another because of unwise parenting practices? These children grow up disliking one another: “Mother always thought you were the prettiest.” “Dad always liked you because you were the smartest and most athletic.” This happens all too often.

6. Parents exasperate their children by neglecting or deriding their God-given bent or disposition.

Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” “In the way he should go” can also be translated as “his way,” or “his bent.” The Amplified Bible translates it this way: “Train up a child in the way he should go [and in keeping with his individual gift or bent], and when he is old he will not depart from it.” The word “way” comes from a Hebrew verb used of a bow launching an arrow.¹³ When a person shoots an arrow, the tension must align with the natural bend in the bow or it will break. This is also true in raising children.

Some parents damage their children by trying to train them in a way God didn’t wire them. They may do this by pushing their them into the medical field, athletics, or music, even though the children show no aptitude or passion in those areas. God gives us children who are already uploaded with a unique and specific program, like a computer. We can’t use software uniquely made for an Apple with a PC. It’s the same with children. Some will be wired towards the arts, technology, or serving ministries. It is the job of parents to get to know the way God wired their children so they can encourage them in those areas.

This can be difficult for parents, especially if their child’s wiring doesn’t fit their expectations or what might be considered successful in society. However, we are called to train a child according to “his way”—according to his own bent (Prov 22:6)—not ours or others’. His “way” may not appeal to us, but we are to raise our children to live for God and fulfill his calling on their lives.

7. Parents exasperate their children by pushing them to achieve beyond reasonable bounds.

Parents often exasperate their children by unrealistic academic, athletic, social, or career expectations. No matter how well the child does, it is never good enough. Eventually the child learns that nothing will ever please his parents—pushing him towards rebellion. Some parents do this because they are trying to live out their unfulfilled dreams through their children, or trying to meet society’s expectations instead of God’s. Many children are exasperated even to the point of suicide by these types of expectations.

Instead of their own expectations or those of the world, Spirit-filled parents seek God’s expectations for their children’s lives.

Application Questions: In what other ways do parents provoke their children to wrath? How can the church play a role in remedying unwise parenting?

In a Spirit-filled Home, Parents Lovingly Raise Their Children in the Lord

Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. (Ephesians 6:4)

Finally, Paul calls for parents to train their children in the Lord. Sadly, in many homes, only culture and secular wisdom are taught—often creating secular, worldly children. But in a Spirit-filled home, parents raise their children in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Interpretation Question: How should parents raise their children in the Lord?

1. Parents raise their children in the Lord by providing for their needs.

“The words ‘bring them up’ means ‘to nourish or feed,’ as in 5:29 which says that a man ‘feeds and cares’ for his own body. Calvin translates ‘bring them up’ with the words, ‘let them be kindly cherished.’”¹⁴

Spirit-filled parents should meet their children’s needs. This includes providing food and shelter, and also caring for them emotionally. To neglect them and not spend time with them is to damage them emotionally, physically, or spiritually. “Bring them up” has the sense of being kind and loving, as seen in Calvin’s translation, “let them be kindly cherished.” Parents must care for their children with kindness instead of treating them harshly.

2. Parents raise their children in the Lord by training them.

The word “training” can be translated discipline or chastening. It means “discipline, even by punishment.”¹⁵ Because children have a sin nature—a propensity to sin—they must be disciplined. Many Scriptures teach the necessity of discipline such as:

He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him. (Proverbs 13:24)

Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death. (Proverbs 19:18)

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. (Hebrews 12:11)

Application Question: What are some principles for disciplining children correctly?

Discipline should never be administered in anger.

Scripture says that “man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires” (James 1:20). As mentioned earlier, when parents yell at their children or spank them in anger, they abuse them. This will not produce the righteous life that God desires in children. Parents should be calm and measured when disciplining their children.

Discipline should fit the sin.

In the Mosaic law, civil discipline had to fit the crime; it was to be “an eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth” (Ex 21:24). This is also true in disciplining children. Parents must wisely consider the consequences for each infraction. If discipline is unfair, it may result in rebellion.

Parents must also discern the difference between childishness and foolishness. Small children are going to spill their milk; that is childishness. But when they spill the milk, are they doing it to be rebellious? Foolishness should be punished, but childishness should be corrected.

Discipline should be consistent.

When parents say, “If you do this, I will discipline you when we get home,” but then do nothing, children learn that their parents don’t always mean what they say. They then conclude that they don’t always have to obey. Also, it confuses children when they can turn on the TV when they should be sleeping on one occasion, but are disciplined for it on another occasion. Discipline must be consistent. In addition, the administration of discipline should be consistent between the parents. They must present a unified front; otherwise, it will encourage manipulation by the children and can cause discord in the marriage.

Discipline should create intimacy instead of distance.

When children disobey their parents, distance is created in the relationship. However, parental discipline shouldn’t create greater distance—it should restore intimacy. This is how God’s discipline functions with us. Sin separates us from God, but his discipline is meant to draw us back into intimacy with him. This is another reason why parents shouldn’t discipline unfairly or in anger; it further alienates children instead of drawing them closer.

How else should parents raise their children in the Lord?

3. Parents raise their children in the Lord by instructing them.

“Instruction” can also be translated as “admonition,” “correction,” or “advice.” It refers to verbal instruction or a verbal warning, with the literal meaning of “to place before the mind”¹⁶ or “putting in mind.”¹⁷ Again, this is what we see in Proverbs: a father instructing his son about life—warning him about the adulterous woman, the practice of sin and dishonesty, and encouraging him to fear the Lord and to find a godly wife. Parents should not only train their children through discipline but also through godly instruction.

The primary instructions that parents should give their children come from God’s Word. Consider what Moses taught the parents in Israel to do with their children in Deuteronomy 6:4-9:

Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

MacArthur says this about the instructions to parents in Deuteronomy 6:

Parents were to continually speak about the things of God, so that knowledge and love of Him would become a matter of life and breath for the family. When the parents were not speaking the testimony would continue. “And you shall bind them as sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead” (v. 8). Even when the parents were gone, the testimony remained, because it was to be written “on the doorposts of your house and on your gates” (v. 9). In other words, there was always to be both verbal and visible commitment to the Word of God in the home. It is God’s plan for His Word to be passed on from one generation to the next. And His primary agent is the family.¹⁸

In a Spirit-filled home, the parents raise their children in the Lord by tenderly providing for them, disciplining them, and instructing them in the Lord.

Application Question: What are some other wise principles or practices for raising children in the Lord?

Conclusion

What are characteristics of a Spirit-filled home?

In a Spirit-filled home, children obey and honor their parents.
In a Spirit-filled home, children understand the importance of obeying and honoring their parents.
In a Spirit-filled home, parents do not exasperate their children.
In a Spirit-filled home, parents lovingly raise their children in the Lord.

Scripture quotations marked KJV or AKJV are from the King James Version or Authorized (King James) Version of the Bible.

All emphases in Scripture quotations and commentators’ quotations have been added.

¹ Cole, Steven, “The Spirit-filled Home Part 1”, accessed 10/27/2015 from https://bible.org/seriespage/lesson-51-spirit-filled-home-part-1-ephesians-61-3

² MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 309). Chicago: Moody Press.

³ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 311). Chicago: Moody Press.

⁴ Saller, Richard. “Family Values in Rome.” Accessed 10/17/2015 from http://fathom.lib.uchicago.edu/1/777777121908/

⁵ “Roman Punishment.” Accessed 10/17/2015 from http://www.romae-vitam.com/roman-punishment.html

⁶ Hughes, R. K. (1990). Ephesians: the mystery of the body of Christ (p. 199). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

⁷ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 312). Chicago: Moody Press.

⁸ Accessed 10/17/ 2015 on https://bible.org/seriespage/lesson-52-spirit-filled-home-part-2-ephesians-64

⁹ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 315). Chicago: Moody Press.

¹⁰ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 316). Chicago: Moody Press.

¹¹ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (pp. 315–316). Chicago: Moody Press.

¹² W. Barclay, The New Daily Study Bible: The Letters to Philippians, Colossians, and Thessalonians, 3rd ed. (Louisville, KY; London: Westminster John Knox Press, 2003), 190.

¹³ Keathley, J. III. The Principle of Nature (Knowing Your Child), accessed 2/8/15 https://bible.org/seriespage/principle-nature-knowing-your-child .

¹⁴ Hughes, R. K. (1990). Ephesians: the mystery of the body of Christ (p. 200). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

¹⁵ Hughes, R. K. (1990). Ephesians: the mystery of the body of Christ (pp. 200–201). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

¹⁶ Hughes, R. K. (1990). Ephesians: the mystery of the body of Christ (p. 201). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

¹⁷ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 319). Chicago: Moody Press.

¹⁸ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 308). Chicago: Moody Press.

Lesson 7: Resolving Personality And Methodology Differences (Acts 15:36-41)

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May 28, 2017

I haven’t read Leslie Flynn’s book, Great Church Fights, but the title makes me want to read it. I did read a story that he tells of two porcupines in the freezing north woods that huddled together to keep warm. But when they got close, their quills stabbed each other, so they had to move apart. They needed each other for the warmth, but they needled each other with their quills!

Church members often are like those porcupines: we need each other, but we needle each other! As Vance Havner observed, there are many “porcupine” Christians—they have their good points, but you can’t get near them!

If you’ve been in the church for any length of time, you’ve no doubt been around someone whose personality grated on yours. Even though you’re supposed to love them, if you were honest, you’d admit that you don’t like them. Or, if you’ve served the Lord in some ministry, you’ve probably tried to work with someone who wanted to do things in a way that seemed wrong to you. You could see that his way wouldn’t work and you knew that your way was the right way! I wish that I were only describing hypothetical situations, but from my many years of pastoral experience, I know that I’m describing reality. I hope I’m not describing anyone’s marriage, but I probably am!

It’s important that you learn to deal with such situations for several reasons. First, the command to love one another is not a minor one! It’s the second greatest commandment and it is linked with the greatest commandment, to love God. If we do not love our brother whom we have seen, we cannot love God whom we have not seen (1 John 4:20). Also, Christian unity is not a minor matter. Jesus prayed just before His death that we would be perfected in unity so that the world would know that the Father had sent Him (John 17:23). We can’t just shrug it off!

Also, I’ve seen Christians become discouraged and quit serving the Lord because of a clash with another believer. Sometimes they even grow disillusioned or cynical about the Christian life because of a clash that they either observed or experienced in the church. They got hurt and wrongly concluded, “Christians are just hypocrites. Christianity doesn’t work.” And they fell away from the Lord. So it’s important to learn what the Bible teaches about resolving personality and methodology differences.

In Acts 15:36-41, Luke reports a clash that occurred between two great men of God, Paul and Barnabas. Frankly, it’s not a pretty picture. I wish that he reported that they both talked things through and calmly agreed to work in different spheres. But the clash led to an unpleasant rupture in the close working relationship between these two godly men. Both Paul and Barnabas must have grieved over this in the years afterward. The lesson for us is that …

Christians must be diligent to maintain unity and continue serving the Lord in spite of personality and methodology differences.

I will make four observations about our text:

1. To maintain unity, recognize that personality and methodology differences may exist, even among mature, godly believers.

We often naïvely think that if we all were spiritually mature, we would never clash with one another. I agree that our clashes should be less frequent and less severe as we grow in the Lord. And, the more mature we are, the more calmly and amicably we should be able to handle our differences. But until we are perfectly sanctified in heaven, we will have differences with other believers. Sometimes they will be severe, especially when two strong leaders clash. Note four things about such personality and methodology differences:

A. Personality and methodology differences can arise between those who share the same theology.

Paul and Barnabas had just come away from the Jerusalem Council, where the core issue of salvation by grace alone through faith alone in Christ alone had been affirmed. Both men firmly agreed about this. They had worked together for over a year teaching the church in Antioch (Acts 11:26), where I’m sure they had to agree on the core doctrines of the Christian faith. But now their personalities clashed over a practical matter of ministry: whether to take Mark along on the second missionary journey.

B. Personality and methodology differences can arise between those who are godly and committed to the cause of Christ.

Paul and Barnabas were not new believers. Both men had walked with God for years. Acts 11:24 describes Barnabas as, “a good man, and full of the Holy Spirit and of faith,” whom the Lord used to bring “considerable numbers” to saving faith. Paul is described as being filled with the Holy Spirit (Acts 13:9). They were both fully committed to doing the will of God, and had risked their lives for the sake of Christ (Acts 15:26). And yet they clashed.

C. Personality and methodology differences can arise between those who have served together for years in the cause of Christ.

Paul and Barnabas had a long history of serving together. It was Barnabas who had gone to Paul and listened to his testimony when the Christians in Jerusalem were afraid to accept him (Acts 9:26-27). Barnabas also went to Tarsus to look for Paul and brought him back to labor with him in the ministry at Antioch (Acts 11:25-26). The Holy Spirit directed that the two men be commissioned together to go out on the first missionary journey (Acts 13:1-3). They had served together in the spiritual battle.

This clash erupted out of godly concern on Paul’s part to revisit the churches that they had seen God establish on that first journey, to see how they were doing in the Lord. Both men had a heart for the wellbeing of the churches. And yet these two teammates, who had labored and suffered together for many years in the cause of Christ, clashed. Serving together for years does not erase personality differences that can lead to strong clashes.

D. Resolving personality and methodology conflicts may require the help of an outside party.

There is no record in Acts 15 that Paul and Barnabas sought the help of the other leaders in Antioch to try to help resolve this conflict. But later, when two women in the church in Philippi were having a conflict, Paul wrote (Phil. 4:2-3),

I urge Euodia and I urge Syntyche to live in harmony in the Lord. Indeed, true companion, I ask you also to help these women who have shared my struggle in the cause of the gospel, together with Clement also and the rest of my fellow workers, whose names are in the book of life.

Paul doesn’t confront these women for being in sin, so their conflict must have been due to personality or methodology differences. But for the unity of the church (Phil. 1:27), it was important for this unnamed “companion” (Epaphroditus?) to help these two faithful women to work through their conflict.

Such a mediator needs to be a mature, committed Christian (Gal. 6:1, “you who are spiritual”) who can apply biblical principles to the conflict. He should be objective, listening to both sides before making any judgment as to who is at fault (Prov. 18:17). He should be open, direct, and truthful. Paul didn’t beat around the bush, hinting that there may be a problem. Rather, he directly named the two women in a letter that would be read to the entire church (and be read by Christians for two millennia!). And, a mediator needs to be affirming and positive wherever possible. Paul affirmed these women for sharing his struggle in the gospel and assured them that their names are written in the book of life. He didn’t doubt their salvation.

So if you get in a conflict with another believer whose personality grates on yours, or who wants to do things differently, don’t escalate the conflict by questioning his salvation. Don’t attack his motives as being sinister. Rather, recognize that personality and methodology differences may exist, even among mature believers.

2. To maintain unity, try to identify the real nature of the difficulty.

I say, “try” because it isn’t always easy to sort things out. Try to disengage your emotions and think objectively about five questions:

(1) Is the conflict due to a theological difference, a personal wrong, spiritual immaturity, different personalities, or different methodologies? We need to be careful here, because it sounds more “spiritual” to say that I’m defending the truth against theological error, or to say that the other person sinned against me, than to say, “His personality grates on mine!” It’s easy, too, to label the other person as spiritually immature, rather than to admit my own shortcomings and faults. In this case, as we’ve seen, both Paul and Barnabas were spiritually mature men. Both were totally committed to the Great Commission. As far as we’re told, this conflict didn’t erupt because one of them sinned against the other (although, as I’m going to suggest, they did sin in the way they dealt with this conflict). Usually, a conflict is due to a mixed bag of reasons.

(2) Is there a biblical principle at stake? Again, be careful here! Is there more than one principle that applies? Paul could have quoted Jesus: “‘No one after putting his hand to the plow and looking back is fit for the kingdom of God.’ Mark shouldn’t go!” And, Barnabas countered, “Yes, but God is the gracious God of the second chance. Look at Jonah. Look at Peter. We need to give Mark another chance.” Both men had Scripture to back up their opposing views! Sometimes, because of personality differences, one man emphasizes one biblical principle, while the other man emphasizes a different biblical principle. Sometimes in such cases, if the principle is basic to one’s approach to ministry, it may be better to agree to work separately.

You may be wondering, “What if you can’t separate from the person that you clash with because you’re married to him (or her)?” That leads to the third question you need to ask:

(3) Is God trying to develop godly character qualities in me through this conflict? Sometimes God in His grace (and humor) throws us together with people who grate on us in order to sandpaper our rough edges. Let’s face it, I don’t need patience, forbearance, gentleness, and kindness when the other person sees everything my way! I don’t need to learn to deny myself when the other person thinks that I’m wonderful. But when there is a clash, God often confronts me with my selfishness and stubbornness. If I submit to Him and don’t bail out of the difficult relationship, He will use it to develop those Christlike qualities in me.

(4) Is this a preference issue, a sin issue, a conscience issue, or a wisdom issue? (This list is from Stuart Scott, The Exemplary Husband [Focus Publishing], p. 256.) If it’s a preference issue, why not yield to the other person’s preference (Phil. 2:3-4)? If it’s a clear sin issue, you need gently to help the other person see it as sin and come to repentance (2 Tim. 2:24-26). If it’s a conscience issue, you need to explain to the other person that you’re not judging him for his behavior, but you can’t in good conscience before the Lord do whatever it is. And, don’t force him to act against his conscience. If it’s a wisdom issue, study the Word together and seek the counsel of godly leaders. If you still can’t come to agreement, you may have to decide not to work together. Then, resist the temptation to say, “I told you so!” if the other person’s method doesn’t work well!

(5) Is God trying to teach me the beauty of the body of Christ? I once heard church consultant Carl George explain that many church conflicts stem from a lack of understanding the God-given differences between spiritual gifts. He told about a church he visited as a consultant. Cars were lined up to get into the parking lot. Young families filled the auditorium and Sunday school classes. He learned that many of them were new believers, excited about the church. They liked the fellowship, the worship, and the pastor’s warm and friendly messages.

But the pastor was discouraged and ready to resign because some of the most mature saints in the church, who taught large adult Sunday school classes, were highly critical of his ministry. “Weak teaching,” they complained. “Nobody can grow on this kind of pabulum,” they griped.

Dr. George helped these critics to see that it was those with the gift of teaching who were critical of the pastor. He wasn’t a strong teacher, but he was gifted more in evangelism and encouragement. Rather than criticizing him, those gifted in teaching needed to see that he was bringing in hundreds of young families who needed the teaching that these gifted teachers could offer. Without the pastor, they wouldn’t have anyone to teach! The same thing could happen in a church where the pastor was a gifted teacher, but not an evangelist. Those gifted in evangelism could gripe that nobody was being won to Christ through the pulpit ministry.

Dr. George points out that you can often tell what a person’s spiritual gift is by what he criticizes. The woman who complains that the church is uncaring probably has the gift of mercy. The guy who gripes about the lack of organization in the church probably has the gift of administration. So if you’re having a personality or methodology clash with a person, listen to what he’s criticizing and you may discover his gift. Affirm that gift and you may be able to divide up the work according to your differing gifts and work together harmoniously.

Thus, to maintain unity, recognize that even mature, godly believers may have personality and methodology conflicts. Try to identify the real nature of the difficulty.

3. To maintain unity, judge your pride and anger and try to talk through the real issues in a spirit of humility and love.

The question comes up, “Who was right in this clash?” Since Luke, who was obviously close to Paul, did not blame Barnabas or Paul, we need to be careful. The slight nod goes to Paul as being right, since it is stated that the brethren commended Silas and Paul to the grace of God, but nothing is said about Barnabas and Mark, except that they sailed away to Cyprus. But in light of the rest of Scripture, I think we can say that both men were right but, also, both men were wrong. Paul was right in that he was a rugged pioneer, venturing into enemy strongholds, and he needed teammates who wouldn’t run when the battle was hard. Mark had not proven himself to be such a man. He should not have gone with Paul.

Barnabas was right in that he saw the undeveloped potential in Mark, and he wanted to extend God’s grace to this young man in spite of his earlier mistake in deserting the cause. History proved him right, in that Paul himself later told the Colossian church to welcome Mark (Col. 4:10); and, in his final imprisonment, Paul told Timothy to bring Mark with him, because he was useful to Paul for ministry (2 Tim. 4:11). So Barnabas’ efforts to reclaim Mark for the cause paid off. Both men were right.

But, also, I think that both men were wrong. I believe they fell into sinful anger in the way they dealt with this disagreement. They both stubbornly dug in their heels and refused to affirm the other man’s point of view. Probably they both would have said that they were standing on a matter of biblical principle. But they could have graciously agreed to disagree and prayed for one another as they parted ways in a spirit of mutual respect. Instead, they had a “sharp disagreement,” which means, they were very provoked with one another (1 Cor. 13:5, Greek text). Neither man was following Paul’s later directive (Col. 3:12), to put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience toward one another. It may have been God’s will for the two men to separate, but it was not His will for them to separate through a heated quarrel.

Two practical observations here:

First, a person’s greatest strengths are often the area of his greatest weaknesses. Paul’s strength was his resolute commitment to follow Christ no matter what the cost, and to stand firm in his convictions. You could beat Paul, throw him in prison, stone him, or shipwreck him, but you couldn’t stop him from proclaiming the gospel of Jesus Christ. Paul’s weakness was that his resolute commitment hindered him from accepting and working with a weaker man, like Mark, who had potential, but needed patient nurture.

Barnabas’ greatest strength was his ability to encourage the fainthearted. He was the champion of the outsider and fringe person. He knew how to show grace to those who had failed. But he erred on the side of showing grace to those who needed to be confronted. As Paul mentions in Galatians 2:13, even Barnabas was carried away with the hypocrisy of Peter and the other Jews who withdrew from eating with the Gentile Christians out of fear of offending the Judaizers.

So the lesson is, know yourself. Where, by God’s grace, are you strong and gifted? Exercise that strength for His glory. But also, be careful, because your strength may lead you into sin if you’re not on guard.

Second, since God always uses imperfect earthen vessels in His service, we should not put too much trust in men, but in God, who alone is perfect. You cannot find two more dedicated, godly servants of Jesus Christ than Paul and Barnabas, and yet here they are, clashing with one another. Throughout the Bible, you see that every great man of God had his weaknesses and failures. While there is a proper place for trusting the leaders that God puts over us, we shouldn’t put them on a pedestal. If we’re trusting in men rather than in the Lord Himself, we’ll be shaken when those men disappoint us. Also, the fact that God uses imperfect men and women in His service should encourage all of us to get involved in serving Him. As long as we are not tolerating known sin in our lives, He can and will use us in His purpose in spite of our imperfections.

4. To maintain unity, if we can’t work out our differences, we still need to continue serving the Lord separately.

Unity does not mean that we all must work closely with one another. While we need to try to work through our differences, there are times when two workers need to recognize that God is calling them to serve the Lord in different spheres. Any parting of ways should be done with mutual respect and without bitterness or acrimony. While I wish that there was some word here about Paul and Barnabas patching things up before they parted ways, at least later Paul did speak in a supportive way of both Barnabas and Mark (1 Cor. 9:6; 2 Tim. 4:11).

Unity does not mean that we all have to agree on every secondary doctrinal or practical matter. As I mentioned several weeks ago, there are some core truths that every Christian must hold to or he is denying the faith. But there are many issues where godly Christians, committed to the Scriptures, disagree. We must be charitable toward one another on these matters.

And, there are many differences over the methods we use to do the Lord’s work. We should seek to follow biblical methods, not worldly methods. Some methods are so unbiblical that they deserve criticism. But as with doctrine, godly men disagree over some methods. We must be charitable toward those whose methods we don’t agree with, even though we can’t work closely with them.

Conclusion

The British admiral, Lord Nelson, once came on deck and found two of his officers quarreling. He whirled them around, pointed to the enemy ships nearby, and exclaimed, “Gentlemen, there are your enemies!”

When we face personality and methodology differences in the church, we need to remember that the enemy is out there! We’re on the same team, members of the same body, committed to furthering the same gospel (Phil. 1:27). If possible, we need to work together in spite of our personality and methodology differences. If not, we can agree to serve the Lord separately, while still affirming one another’s gifts and contributions to the cause of Jesus Christ.

Application Questions

How does liking someone interface with loving him (or her)? Is it wrong not to like everyone?
Does the Bible support particular methods, or is one method as good as the next, as long as it works?
What does Paul mean when he says, “Be of the same mind” (Phil. 2:2; 4:2; Rom. 12:16; 15:5)? Is it wrong biblically to form separate denominations based on minor doctrinal differences?
What in the church do you tend to be critical of? Could this reveal your gift? What should you do about it?

Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture Quotations are from the New American Standard Bible, Updated Edition © The Lockman Foundation

Related Topics: Ecclesiology (The Church)

21. How to Glorify Christ in the Workplace

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Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ. Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you, but like slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men, because you know that the Lord will reward everyone for whatever good he does, whether he is slave or free. And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favoritism with him. (Ephesians 6:5-9)

How can we glorify Christ in the workplace? What should a Christian worker look like?

Each person is called to work. Some work as students, some as teachers, some as mothers, some in business, etc. Everybody works for a living. The primary difference is pay. Some don’t get paid at all, some get paid a little, and some get paid a lot. What should the Christian’s work life look like?

Often, people think of work as a bad thing. Some may even think it is a result of the fall (Gen 3:17–18). However, work was given before the fall. It was Adam’s responsibility to till the ground and take care of the Garden of Eden (Gen 2:15).

In fact, Scripture teaches that we will work in heaven. Luke 19:17 tells us that those who are faithful with their gifts and talents on earth will be rewarded with overseeing cities in the coming kingdom.

Also, in Revelation 21:2, we see the holy city of Jerusalem coming out of heaven to the earth. Just the fact that heaven is called a city implies many characteristics about eternity. A city has commerce, education, and government. Heaven will not be sitting on a cloud doing nothing. It will be worshiping and serving the Lord together in the heavenly city forever. It has always been God’s will for man to work.

Moreover, our God is a worker too! He creates and sustains the world by the power of his Word (Heb 1:2-3). He is not idle! Christ, God the Son, prays for his saints in order to save them to the uttermost (Heb 7:25). We serve a God who neither sleeps nor slumbers (Ps. 121:4). He is always active in his creation.

Work is something we do here on earth and something we will also do in heaven. It is a way that we imitate God and bring honor to him. If work is something we will do throughout eternity, we must ask ourselves, “How can we work in such a way that God is glorified?”

In Ephesians 6:5-9, Paul speaks to slaves, who constituted much of the workforce in the ancient world, and to their masters. He tells them how to work to glorify Christ. We see this in the number of times “Christ,” “Lord,” and “Master” are mentioned in this passage. It is mentioned in every verse. In verse 5, it says, “as you would obey Christ.” In verse 6, “like slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart.” In verse 7, “as if you were serving the Lord.” In verse 8, “the Lord will reward everyone.” In verse 9, “he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven.” As this is connected to Paul’s call to be Spirit-filled in Ephesians 5:18, Paul is saying that a Spirit-filled worker glorifies Christ in the workplace, even as Christ is glorified in a Spirit-filled marriage (Eph 5:22-33) and a Spirit-filled household (Eph 6:1-4).

The Christian’s workplace is supposed to be a place of worship to the Lord—no matter how corrupt and ungodly the environment. Christian employees must remember this. As 1 Corinthians 10:31 says, “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.”

In light of this reality, John Stott says:

It is possible for the housewife to cook a meal as if Jesus Christ were going to eat it, or to spring-clean the house as if Jesus Christ were to be the honoured guest. It is possible for teachers to educate children, for doctors to treat patients and nurses to care for them, for solicitors to help clients, shop assistants to serve customers, accountants to audit books and secretaries to type letters as if in each case they were serving Jesus Christ.¹

No doubt, this is why some Christian housewives have this motto over their kitchen sink: ‘Divine service held here three times daily.’—it is a form of worship.²

A Word about Slavery

It is important to remember that slavery was universal in the ancient world. There were about sixty million slaves in the Roman Empire, an estimated third or half of the population.³ They constituted the majority of the workforce. This “included not only domestic servants and manual labourers but educated people as well, like doctors, teachers and administrators. Slaves could be inherited or purchased, or acquired in settlement of a bad debt, and prisoners of war commonly became slaves.”⁴ In addition, “selling oneself into slavery was commonly used as a means of obtaining Roman citizenship and gaining an entrance into society.”⁵

Although, Scripture does not condemn slavery, it clearly speaks against kidnapping and enslaving people. Exodus 21:16 says, “‘Anyone who kidnaps another and either sells him or still has him when he is caught must be put to death.” In addition, 1 Timothy 1:9-10 addresses how the law condemns “slave traders.”

However, Scripture does condone some beneficial forms of slavery. MacArthur’s comments on this are helpful:

Certain types of nonabusive and beneficial slavery were permitted, or even advocated, in the Old Testament. For example, a thief who could not make restitution could be indentured until repayment was worked out—a plan far superior to the modern prison sentence which provides for no restitution of property or money to the victim or restoration of dignity for the thief. Israelites were allowed to buy slaves from the pagan nations around them (Lev. 25:44), but fellow Israelites could not be bought or sold, although they could voluntarily indenture themselves until the year of jubilee (v. 39–40). During their time of service they were to be treated as hired workers, not as slaves (v. 40–41, 46). Even pagan slaves were not to be abused and were given their freedom if seriously injured by their master (Ex. 21:26–27). A slave who fled from an oppressive master was to be given asylum and protection (Deut. 23:15–16). A fellow Israelite could not be used as a slave for more than six years, at the end of which he was to be given liberal provisions as a form of severance pay (Ex. 21:2; Deut. 15:13–14). Every fiftieth year, the year of jubilee, all slaves were to be freed and returned to their families (Lev. 25:10). A slave who loved his master and preferred to remain with him could voluntarily indenture himself for life by having his ear pierced by his master (Ex. 21:5–6). The kind of slavery controlled by scriptural teaching was a blessing to both employer and employee and was a rewarding and fulfilling relation between them.⁶

Voluntary slavery was often a way for a person or family to eat and to receive protection. It was not unusual for there to be great love between a master and a slave, as seen with Abraham and his chief servant, Eliezer. Before Abraham had his first child, Eliezer was the heir to his household (Gen 15:3). Unfortunately, the institution of slavery was not always pleasant and was commonly abused, especially in the Greco-Roman culture, where slaves were simply property. To that culture, Paul wrote about Spirit-filled conduct between slaves and masters that glorified Christ.

With all that said, though Scripture doesn’t focus on reforming ungodly systems like slavery, it does focus on reforming the root of these systems—the heart. Where Scripture and the gospel have spread, it has changed the hearts of the greedy, the prideful, and the racist—leading to the abolishment of ungodly systems. It has often led to the abolishment of slavery, of unfair treatment of women, and of the murder of the unborn.

In this text Paul speaks to slaves and masters, calling them to glorify Christ in the workplace. Since slaves constituted much of the ancient workforce, these principles apply directly to employees and employers today. Sadly, our workplaces are often not honoring to God; they are filled with complaining, bitterness, unrest, and even dishonesty, even by believers. However, this was never God’s will. Let’s consider Paul’s exhortations on how to honor and glorify Christ in the workplace.

Big Question: How can employees and employers glorify Christ in the workplace?

To Glorify Christ in the Workplace, Employees Must Obey Their Employers

Though many worked for non-Christian masters who were harsh and abusive, Paul calls for slaves to obey them as they would obey Christ. The word “obey” is “in the present tense in the Greek, indicating uninterrupted obedience.”⁷ The only time they should disobey is when called to do something sinful (cf. Col 3:22, Acts 4:18, 19).

In verses 5-8, Paul gives principles of how slaves should bring glory to Christ through obedience to their earthly masters. Again, this applies directly to Christian employees.

Observation Question: In what ways should employees obey their employers in order to glorify Christ, according to Ephesians 6:5-8?

1. To glorify Christ, employees must obey with the right perspective.

Interpretation Question: Why does Paul refer to “earthly masters” in Ephesians 6:5, and what are some implications?

When Paul says, “Slaves, obey your ‘earthly’ masters,” he reminds slaves that their work and submission to their masters is temporary. Our current jobs and careers are temporary because we can only work at a certain place or do certain jobs for a limited period of time. More importantly, they are temporary because we were made for eternity. And one day, we will be in heaven with our Heavenly Master.

This is important to remember for many reasons. (1) One person finds himself depressed and unsatisfied because he doesn’t enjoy his career and it is extremely difficult. This worker must remember that his career or job is earthly and temporary. Our final destination and workplace is heaven. We must live with a proper perspective of this.

(2) Another person becomes consumed with his job to the point of idolatry. He focuses on his work to the exclusion of God and often family. Again, this is wrong. Our primary job is to serve and honor God. Those who focus entirely on their earthy job and earthly employers to the exclusion of God will live worldly lives. Again, we must remember that we have a heavenly employer. First Corinthians 3:9 calls us “co-workers” with God. We work for him and with him to build his kingdom on this earth, and we will work for him and with him in heaven. This must be our primary focus wherever God places us.

Christian workers, remember that your job is temporary! You are really serving the Heavenly Master. Don’t let work become your life, which will lead to either discouragement or idolatry—it is only temporary. Live for eternity.

Do you work with the right perspective? Our careers are temporary, but our calling to work for God is eternal.

Application Questions: Why is it important to keep the right perspective in the workplace—that our work is temporary? How have you struggled with this?

2. To glorify Christ, employees must obey with respect and fear.

Interpretation Question: What does Paul mean when he calls slaves to serve their masters with “respect and fear”?

He does not mean a cowering fright, but he does mean to serve with an honor and respect that makes them anxious to please their masters. Obviously, this was hard at times, especially when serving a master that was difficult and ungodly. However, in such cases the slave’s—or for us the employee’s--fear and trembling must be for the higher authority that their master represented.

Romans 13:1-2 says,

Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.

All authorities are established by God, even evil ones. Spirit-filled Christians must recognize the God-given authority of their employers. We see this with David and Saul. Even though King Saul tried to kill David, David continued to say, “I will not touch God’s anointed” (1 Sam 26:9, paraphrase). Even though Saul was an evil authority, David always honored and respected him in recognition of God’s authority behind Saul’s position.

Paul probably was also addressing the situation of Christian slaves serving Christian masters. No doubt some masters attended churches where their slaves attended and even pastored. As a result, some slaves, in focusing on their spiritual equality with their masters, were beginning to show them less respect. Paul addresses this problem in 1 Timothy 6:1-2:

All who are under the yoke of slavery should consider their masters worthy of full respect, so that God’s name and our teaching may not be slandered. Those who have believing masters are not to show less respect for them because they are brothers. Instead, they are to serve them even better, because those who benefit from their service are believers, and dear to them. These are the things you are to teach and urge on them.

For Christian employees, there is no place for insubordination or disrespect of employers. Although our culture readily accepts complaining and dishonoring leaders, Christians should be struck with fear and trembling. Why? It’s because they recognize God’s authority, even over the ungodly. Like David, they declare, “Who can touch God’s anointed and be guiltless?”

Do you work with fear and trembling to honor God? Is there a reverence to your work?

Application Questions: How can employees honor an unfair or unjust employer/authority? Have you ever encountered this situation? How did you respond?

3. To glorify Christ, employees must obey with sincerity of heart.

Next, Paul calls for believers to serve “with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ” (Eph 6:5). “‘Sincerity’ literally means singleness of heart, the idea being that we ought to obey and serve with an undivided mind—with no ulterior motive or hypocrisy.”⁸

It means that Spirit-filled employees serve with a heart that pleases God—not one full of pride, bitterness, selfish ambition, or anything that could be disruptive—because they are focused on their Heavenly Master. Like David they cry out, “May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing to you, O Lord, My rock and my redeemer” (Psalm 19:14, NLT). They want their hearts and their actions to honor God in whatever place God has called them to serve.

Do you work with singleness of heart as unto the Lord?

Application Questions: How can employees keep a sincere heart in the workplace? What are some distractions from this type of heart?

4. To glorify Christ, employees must obey without eye service.

Paul says, “Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you” (Eph 6:6). This can also be translated as, “Not with eyeservice, as menpleasers” (KJV). The Spirit-filled employee doesn’t only work hard when the employer is watching.

The picture Paul paints here is reminiscent of a contemporary gym class. While doing push-ups, the students stay in the up position while the gym teacher is not looking. Many are like that in the workplace. When the boss is around they work diligently, but when he is not, they play video games, crack jokes, and play on social media. Believers should endeavor to deliver sixty minutes of work for every hour of pay.

Do you work without eye service—delivering a day’s work whether your boss is around or not?

Application Questions: In what ways have you seen or experienced workers that render eye service instead of faithful service in the workplace? How have you struggled with this?

5. To glorify Christ, employees must obey with a good attitude.

Paul says, “Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord” (Eph 6:7). This can also be translated as “with good will,” “enthusiastically,” “eagerly,” or “with a good attitude.”

The Spirit-filled believer works eagerly, with a positive attitude instead of a bitter and complaining one. Just as Scripture says God loves a cheerful giver (2 Cor 9:7), God loves a cheerful worker. Colossians 3:23 says, “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.”

Now, you can imagine the normal attitude of slaves in that difficult environment. Why work hard? They often didn’t receive pay or incentives. For most, other than fear of their masters, there really wasn’t a reason to be motivated. However, Christian slaves had many reasons to be motivated, the greatest one being that they were in fact serving God.

Do you work with a good attitude—eager and enthusiastically? Or are you a complainer?

Application Questions: How can employees maintain a good attitude in a bad work situation? Have you ever experienced a work environment where it was hard to maintain joy?

6. To glorify Christ, employees must obey with an expectation of God’s judgment and reward.

Finally, Paul says, “because you know that the Lord will reward everyone for whatever good he does, whether he is slave or free” (Eph 6:8). Christian employees should work with an expectation of God’s judgment. God will reward each one for what he does, and this should be a tremendous motivation for us.

Do you work with a view of God’s judgment and reward?

John MacArthur tells the story of two missionaries returning home to the United States. It is a helpful reminder of the importance of having an expectation of God’s judgment and reward.

The story is told of an elderly missionary couple who were returning home on a ship after many years of sacrificial service in Africa. On the same ship was Theodore Roosevelt, who had just completed a highly successful big game hunt. As the ship docked in New York harbor, thousands of well–wishers and dozens of reporters lined the pier to welcome Roosevelt home. But not a single person was there to welcome the missionaries. As the couple rode to a hotel in a taxi, the man complained to his wife, “It just doesn’t seem right. We give forty years of our lives to Jesus Christ to win souls in Africa, and nobody knows or cares when we return. Yet the president goes over there for a few weeks to kill some animals and the whole world takes notice.” But as they prayed together that night before retiring, the Lord seemed to say to them, “Do you know why you haven’t received your reward yet, My children? It is because you are not home yet.”⁹

If we forget that he is the one who rewards us, it is easy to become discouraged and apathetic. Although there is certainly a sense in which God rewards us on earth, as promotion and exaltation come from the Lord (cf. Ps 75:6-7), he will especially reward us in heaven (cf. 1 Cor 3:11-15, Luke 19:17).

Desire for reward and fear of God’s discipline would also be a motivation for lazy or evil slaves to repent. They would not want to experience loss of heavenly reward (cf. 1 Cor 3:14-15) and God’s discipline (cf. 1 Cor 11:31-32; Heb 12:6). Fear of God’s judgment should also motivate us to be faithful employees.

Application Questions: In what ways are fear of God’s judgment and anticipation of his reward motivators to faithful service in the workplace? Are they motivators for you?

Because of practicing these truths, Christian slaves were often sold for a higher price than pagan slaves.¹⁰ When Spirit-filled, they worked respectfully, with the right attitude, without eye service, and with many other godly traits. They did this because they were serving God and not men. Being a Christian should make us better at whatever God calls us to do, including our jobs.

Application Questions: Which principles about glorifying Christ in the workplace are most challenging to you and why? In what ways has your faith affected your performance in the workplace?

To Glorify Christ in the Workplace, Employers Must Care for Their Employees

And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favoritism with him. (Ephesians 6:9)

Interpretation Question: What does Paul mean by “masters, treat your slaves in the same way”?

Many believe “in the same way” refers primarily to verse 6, where Paul says, “doing the will of God from your heart.”¹¹ Masters must have the same motivation and goal as the Christian slave: to obey, please, and glorify the Lord. Again, this is really an application of being filled with the Spirit and of submitting to one another out of reverence to Christ (Eph 5:18-21).

Paul expands further on how masters should treat their slaves throughout Eph 6:9, and these truths can be applied directly to Christian employers and managers.

Observation Question: In what ways should masters treat their slaves in order to glorify Christ according to Ephesians 6:9, and how does this apply to Christian employers today?

1. To glorify Christ, employers must treat workers the way they want to be treated.

Another interpretation of “masters, treat your slaves in the same way,” is that it essentially refers to the golden rule. “If the employer expects the workers to do their best for him, he must do his best for them. The master must serve the Lord from his heart if he expects his servants to do the same. He must not exploit them.”¹² Kent Hughes comments are also helpful:

What Paul is telling those in authority is, treat your slaves/employees the way you want to be treated. If you want respect, show respect. If you want sincerity, be sincere. If you want conscientiousness, you be the same. If you want pleasantness, model pleasantness. “Promote the welfare of your slaves as you expect them to promote yours. Show the same interest in them and in their affairs as you hope they will show in you and your affairs.”¹³

This is the Golden Rule of managers and employers: Treat employees the way you would want to be treated.

When in leadership, do you treat people the way you want to be treated?

Application Questions: How have you seen the Golden Rule modeled by those in leadership? How do you want to be treated as an employee?

2. To glorify Christ, employers must focus on positive reinforcement rather than threats or punishment.

When Paul says, “Do not threaten them,” he is not saying that masters should never use their authority. They should—their authority is from God. However, it should not be the primary way they lead. A manager who continually says, “Do this or I will fire you,” will destroy employee morale. No doubt, this type of demanding leadership was common to slave masters. Under Roman law slaves were property, and masters had the right to kill them if they so desired. Although this rarely happened since slaves were so expensive, many masters led by abusing their authority.

A Spirit-filled master or employer “uses his authority and power as little as possible and does not throw his weight around or lord it over those under him. He is never abusive or inconsiderate.”¹⁴ “In other words, ‘Let your approach be positive, not negative.’ Hence, not, ‘Unless you do this, I will do that to you,’ but rather, ‘Because you are a good and faithful servant, I will give you a generous reward.’”¹⁵

This is how Christ deals with us—his servants. He promises that if we are faithful, he will reward us. In the Parable of the Talents, Christ says, “‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!’” (Matt 25:21). Similarly, good employers use positive verbal reinforcement such as, “Thank you” or “Good job.” They do this both privately and publicly when it is warranted. And when they can, they also reward their employees with tangible benefits such as promotions, higher wages, and extra vacation days.

Spirit-filled employers focus on positive reinforcement rather than threats and punishment.

Is your leadership style positive or negative?

Application Questions: What are some positive ways that employers can motivate their employees? What is your experience with these motivational strategies? How have you seen or experienced the opposite, and what were its effects?

3. To glorify Christ, employers must remember the lordship of Christ.

Paul says, “Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favoritism with him” (Eph 6:9). He calls for slave masters to always remember that they are under the authority and lordship of Christ. They are essentially stewards of God’s authority and resources, and one day they will be held accountable for their stewardship. And this accountability will be without partiality—masters and slaves, employers and employees, are equal before God. Leaders must ask themselves every day, “Would God approve?” If the answer is no or they are unsure, they must ask, “How can I do better?”

Application Questions: How can employers and employees keep their focus on the lordship of Christ? How have you applied this when in leadership positions? How are you going to apply it in the future?

4. To glorify Christ, employers must not show favoritism.

As Paul reminds masters that with God there is no favoritism, the implication is that they should not show favoritism either. Earthly masters and employers are just representatives of their Heavenly Master.

Wiersbe says, “One of the fastest ways for a leader to divide his followers and lose their confidence is for the leader to play favorites and show partiality.”¹⁶ Giving unfair favor or discipline can often be hazardous to cohesion and unity in the workplace. Christian employers must avoid this. Paul says something similar to Timothy, who later pastored the Ephesian church, “I charge you, in the sight of God and Christ Jesus and the elect angels, to keep these instructions without partiality, and to do nothing out of favoritism” (1 Timothy 5:21). Christian employers must lead without partiality or favoritism.

Application Question: How have you seen or experienced favoritism destroying the workplace?

Christian employers must work and care for their employees as unto the Lord. This is something that God gives his Spirit to enable (Eph 5:18). Employees should see the power and wisdom of God in the leadership of Christian employers, and it should inspire them to follow Christ.

Application Questions: Who was your favorite manager/employer and why? What are some other good managerial principles that Christians should employ in the workplace?

Conclusion

How can believers glorify Christ in the workplace?

To glorify Christ, employees must obey with the right perspective.
To glorify Christ, employees must obey with respect and fear.
To glorify Christ, employees must obey with sincerity of heart.
To glorify Christ, employees must obey without eye service.
To glorify Christ, employees must obey with a good attitude.
To glorify Christ, employees must obey with an expectation of God’s judgment and reward.
To glorify Christ, employers must treat workers the way they want to be treated.
To glorify Christ, employers must focus on positive enforcement rather than negative.
To glorify Christ, employers must remember the lordship of Christ.
To glorify Christ, employers must not show favoritism.

Again, we must be filled with the Spirit to fulfill these commands—meaning our primary focus must be abiding in Christ so these fruits can be born in our lives for his glory.

Scripture quotations marked KJV or AKJV are from the King James Version or Authorized (King James) Version of the Bible.

All emphases in Scripture quotations and commentators’ quotations have been added.

¹ Stott, J. R. W. (1979). God’s new society: the message of Ephesians (p. 252). Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press.

² MacDonald, W. (1995). Believer’s Bible Commentary: Old and New Testaments. (A. Farstad, Ed.) (p. 1950). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

³ Accessed 10/24/2015 from https://bible.org/seriespage/lesson-54-working-god-ephesians-65-9

⁴ Stott, J. R. W. (1979). God’s new society: the message of Ephesians (p. 250). Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press.

⁵ Hughes, R. K. (1990). Ephesians: the mystery of the body of Christ (p. 206). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

⁶ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 324). Chicago: Moody Press.

⁷ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 325). Chicago: Moody Press.

⁸ Hughes, R. K. (1990). Ephesians: the mystery of the body of Christ (p. 208). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

⁹ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 328). Chicago: Moody Press.

¹⁰ MacDonald, W. (1995). Believer’s Bible Commentary: Old and New Testaments. (A. Farstad, Ed.) (p. 1951). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

¹¹ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (pp. 328–329). Chicago: Moody Press.

¹² Wiersbe, W. W. (1996). The Bible exposition commentary (Vol. 2, p. 55). Wheaton, IL: Victor Books.

¹³ Hughes, R. K. (1990). Ephesians: the mystery of the body of Christ (p. 210). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books.

¹⁴ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 329). Chicago: Moody Press.

¹⁵ Hendriksen, W., & Kistemaker, S. J. (1953–2001). Exposition of Ephesians (Vol. 7, p. 265). Grand Rapids: Baker Book House.

¹⁶ Wiersbe, W. W. (1996). The Bible exposition commentary (Vol. 2, p. 56). Wheaton, IL: Victor Books.

24. The Footwear of Peace and the Shield of Faith

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and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. (Ephesians 6:15-16)

How can we stand firm in spiritual warfare? When we became Christians, we gained an enemy. Satan and his demons desire to steal our peace and joy, kill our physical bodies, and destroy our witness and callings. In this final section of Ephesians, Paul addresses this war and how Christians must stand firm. We stand firm in the strength and power of the Lord—apart from this, we will be destroyed (Eph 6:10). But we also stand firm by putting on the full armor of God (Eph 6:11). Each piece must be firmly put in place. The armor of God refers to righteous character traits (cf. Col 3:12). Therefore, sin in the life of believers gives the devil a foothold to destroy us and others.

Previously, we looked at the belt of truth and the breastplate of righteousness. Each piece of armor not only represents character traits but also, through implication, how Satan attacks. The belt of truth reminds us that Satan is a liar and that he constantly uses deception. The breastplate of righteousness reminds us that Satan attacks our vital organs representing our mind and emotions and also that sin in general opens a door for him.

In Ephesians 6:15-16, we will consider the footwear of peace and the breastplate of righteousness, as well as its implications about Satan’s schemes.

Big Questions: How can believers stand firm by putting on the footwear of peace and the breastplate of righteousness? What do these two pieces of armor represent?

Believers Stand Firm by Putting On the Footwear of Peace

and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. (Ephesians 6:15)

When Paul talks about “feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace,” he is picturing the footwear of a Roman soldier. They typically wore a half-boot with the toes uncovered and spikes coming out of the soles. The boots allowed “the soldier to be ready to march, climb, fight, or do whatever else is necessary.”¹ The spikes specifically helped when hiking or on slippery surfaces.

Without the right shoes, the soldier’s feet were prone to blisters, cuts, and other problems which put him at a disadvantage in battle. The soldier’s shoes were very important—without them, he wasn’t ready to fight.

Similarly, there is appropriate footwear for believers to wear in spiritual battles. It is the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. As with the other pieces of armor, commentators are not unanimous on what this represents. It could represent several things, as outlined below.

Interpretation Question: What does feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace represent?

1. The readiness that comes from the gospel of peace represents appropriating the believer’s peace with God.

Romans 5:1 says, “Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.”

This is important because the enemy always aims to separate believers from God. It is God who gives believers the strength to put on God’s armor and the power to conquer the devil. Therefore, the enemy always seeks to separate Christians from the source of all that is good. Sometimes he uses lies to foster anger at God. He often begins by cultivating a wrong view of God. Believers start to believe that God doesn’t love them or want what’s best for them—that he just doesn’t care. Satan creates a caricature of God—a God of wrath but not a God of love, a God of judgment but not a God of mercy. However, God is all of these.

We must put on the gospel of peace by remembering that Christ died to bridge the chasm between us and God. He paid the penalty for our sins and gave us his righteousness so that we could know God and come into his presence. Jesus says, “I give them eternal life and this is eternal life—knowing God” (John 17:3, paraphrase). Christ died so we could come near God and have an intimate relationship with him.

In fact, Christ always strove to correct the disciples’ thinking about God. In Luke 11:13, he said, “If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” Christ wanted the disciples to know that their Abba desired to give them the greatest gifts—and it’s the same for us. Do you know that our God wants to bless us, and that if we’re in Christ we’re at peace with him?

What is your view of God? Is he unloving, removed, strict, and overbearing? If so, you need to put on the footwear of peace—by recognizing that Christ removed the barrier between God and us. A wrong image of God destroys our footing. We cannot fight if we don’t see God as he is: our Father, our Abba, our friend, and our spouse.

Are you wearing the footwear of peace?

2. The readiness that comes from the gospel of peace represents having the peace of God.

Not only has God given each of us peace with himself, but we also have the peace of God. In John 14:27, Jesus says, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” The peace Christ had while asleep in the boat during the storm, the peace that enabled him to go to the cross, he has given to us. It is not God’s will for us to live in anxiety, fear, and worry. Scripture says, “Do not be afraid,” “Do not worry,” and “Be anxious for nothing” (Phil 4:6). Christ has given us the promise of his peace.

If you are worried, anxious, and fearful, you have the wrong footwear for this battle. Our enemy is a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour (1 Peter 5:8). The lion roars to incite fear in his prey. Some believers are fearful about their future; others are fearful about what others think or say. Others are afraid of failure. These fears undermine the footing of Christians—our readiness for battle comes from God’s peace.

Therefore, God commands us to put on his peace. Colossians 3:15 says, “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.” Paul also refers to the peace of Christ as clothing to be worn (cf. Col 3:12). As believers, we must let God’s peace rule in our hearts—not fear of failure, losing our jobs, or rejection. Satan wants to lead us as slaves through fear, but God guides us as children through his peace (cf. Rom 8:15).

Do you have peace in your heart? Or are you tormented by fear?

First John 4:18 says, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” A good earthly father doesn’t want his children worried about food, drink, and clothing. He doesn’t want his children worried about their future. As much as he can control events, he does so for their good. It’s the same with our heavenly Father—except that, unlike our earthly fathers, he is all-wise and all-powerful. He wants us to know that he loves us and that he works all things for our good (Rom 8:28).

Are you wearing the footwear of peace, or are you wearing fear, anxiety, and torment?

Application Question: How can we put on the peace of God instead of fear and anxiety?

Philippians 4:6-7 says,

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

If we are going to have God’s peace, we must reject anxiety and fear. They are not God’s will for us, and they are sinful. They say, “God, you are not to be trusted,” or “You are not in control.”
If we are going to have God’s peace, we must learn to pray about everything. Prayer must become the atmosphere we live in. When we are not living in prayer (i.e. God’s presence), the storms of life will constantly frighten and overwhelm us.
If we are going to have God’s peace, we must learn to give thanks in everything. When we complain, murmur, and criticize, we lose the peace of God.

3. The readiness that comes from the gospel of peace represents spreading the gospel.

The association of feet with the gospel is not uncommon in Scripture. Isaiah 52:7 says, “How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace, who bring good tidings, who proclaim salvation, who say to Zion, ‘Your God reigns!’” In Romans 10:15, Paul says, “And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written, ‘How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!’”

One of our responsibilities in this war is to share the gospel with others. It is each person’s assignment. Second Corinthians 5:18-20 says:

All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.

In hand to hand combat, if one side is only playing defense, he will eventually be defeated. He must also attack. Our battle as believers is not just defensive; it is, in fact, primarily offensive. We are called to advance the kingdom of God by spreading the gospel everywhere in the name of Jesus. If you are not doing so, you won’t stand firm. The enemy’s offensive will eventually swallow you up.

Are you spreading the gospel? Is that your purpose at school, work, and home, and with family and friends?

Our feet must always be ready with the gospel. First Peter 3:15 says, “But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.”

I think this also shows us how Satan attacks. He wants to attack our zeal for the gospel. He wants to quiet us. If we have lost our zeal, then we no longer are wearing the footwear of peace.

4. The readiness that comes from the gospel of peace represents peace in our relationships with others.

This is one of the major themes of Ephesians. Paul teaches the mystery of the gospel that God makes the Jew and Gentile one in Christ. Consider Ephesians 2:12-14:

remember that at that time you were separate from Christ, excluded from citizenship in Israel and foreigners to the covenants of the promise, without hope and without God in the world. But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ. For he himself is our peace, who has made the two one and has destroyed the barrier, the dividing wall of hostility,

Animosity between Jew and Gentile was a major issue for the early church. In Acts 6, the Jews neglected the Greek widows in the daily distribution while providing for the Hebrew widows. However, Paul said Christ is our peace—he has made us one.

Surely disunity is one of the major weapons the enemy uses against our churches. Sometimes he brings disunity through racism, as seen with the Jews and Gentiles in the early church. Sometimes he uses doctrine. What God means to equip and strengthen us, the enemy uses to bring division and discord. Most times, he just uses pride. Pride says, “My way is the only way, and it can’t be done any other way.” Churches divide over changing the color of the carpet, the music, the flow of worship services, and any other thing. The root of this is pride—”my way is the only way.”

In attacking the church, Satan seeks to bring division. Remember, Paul says in Ephesians 4:26-27 not to let the sun go down while we are angry, and not to give the devil a foothold. Christ is our peace.

Are you living in peace with those around you? As much as depends on you, live at peace with all men (Rom 12:18).

Application Question: In what ways have you experienced Satan’s attacks through division in your relationships—friends, family, co-workers, and church members? How have those experiences affected you and your relationship with God?

Are you wearing the right footwear for our spiritual war? Are you recognizing our peace with God? He loves us and cares for us. Are you being filled with the peace of God in your circumstances? Are you sharing the gospel—always prepared to give a defense of the hope that is in you? Finally, are you living at peace with all men, as much as depends on you?

Application Question: In what ways does the enemy constantly attack your readiness from the gospel of peace? How is God calling you to put on his footwear?

Believers Stand Firm by Taking Up the Shield of Faith

In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. (Ephesians 6:16)

The Greek word thureos, translated “shield,” referred to a large shield about two and half feet wide and four and a half feet high. It was designed to protect the entire body of a soldier. The shield was like a door—made of solid wood and covered with metal or leather. It was often dipped in water to extinguish the fiery arrows of the enemy.²

Armies often wrapped pieces of cloth around arrows, soaked them in pitch, set them on fire, and then shot them at the enemy. Upon contact an arrow would often “spatter burning bits for several feet, igniting anything flammable it touched.”³

Our enemy also shoots flaming arrows at us. He shoots the arrows of criticism, fear, covetousness, anger, depression, doubt, lust, and every other temptation. In order to stand firm, we must take up the shield of faith.

Interpretation Question: What is the shield of faith and how can believers take it up?

1. The shield of faith refers to trust in God’s person.

When Abram was struggling with fear, God said to him, “Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward.” (Gen 15:1). Essentially, God said, “Trust me. I will protect you and reward you.” Our protection is God himself and we must trust in him.

Putting on the shield of faith means running to God when life is difficult, when life is good, and when life is mundane. Believers without the shield of faith will run to everything else before God. When in a trial, they will run to coffee, to cigarettes, to relationships, to pity parties, etc. However, when we’re wearing the shield of faith, we’ll run to God. He is our shield—therefore we must trust him.

Application Question: How can we learn to trust God more?

Believers learn to trust God by knowing his character.

Proverbs 18:10 says, “The name of the LORD is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe.” In the ancient world, a person’s name was not simply what he was called; it referred to his character. The writer of the proverb says that knowing God’s character is a tremendous protection for us. The more we know God and who he is, the stronger we can stand in spiritual warfare.

At the same time, the less we know God and his character, the more prone we’ll be to believe Satan’s lies and stumble.

We must understand that God is perfect, all-knowing, all-present, and all-powerful. We must know that he loves us, cares for us, and wants the best for us. We must understand that he is sovereign and in control of all events—nothing happens apart from his watchful eye. If we don’t understand this, we will be prone to anxiety, fear, and anger. God works all things according to the purpose of his will (Eph 1:11).

Believers learn to trust God by knowing his promises.

God has given us many promises to help us stand in spiritual warfare. Second Peter 1:3-4 says,

His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.

When tempted to fear, we take hold of Philippians 4:6-7—if we pray and give thanks in everything, the peace of God will guard our hearts and minds. When we feel like giving up, we hold on to Isaiah 40:31— those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength. When burnt out, we take courage in Proverbs 11:25—those who refresh others shall themselves be refreshed. When weak, we hold on to 2 Corinthians 12:9—God’s power is made perfect in our weakness; therefore, we will boast in our infirmities and trials. When God seems distant, we hold on to James 4:8—if we draw near God, he will draw near us.

Are you taking up the shield of faith by holding on to God’s promises? God has given us many promises to help us to stand in the day of evil.

Believers learn to trust God by faithfully walking with him.

The longer we walk with God, the more we will trust him. As we watch God part our Red Seas, defeat our Goliaths, close the mouths of lions, and use the evil intentions and actions of others for good, it enables us to trust him more.

Are you spending time with God—being in his presence? The less you are with a person, the less you will trust them. In order to be ready for this battle, you must live in the presence of God—walking faithfully with him.

What else does the shield of faith refer to?

2. The shield of faith refers to dependence on the body of Christ.

In ancient times, the edges of this shield were “so constructed that an entire line of soldiers could interlock shields and march into the enemy like a solid wall. This suggests that we Christians are not in the battle alone.”⁴

The enemy attacks from every direction, and we need one another to stand firm. Yes, doing so is a struggle since the church is not perfect, as God is. However, it is the means through which God chooses to impart his grace. He works through an imperfect body. If we don’t avail ourselves of the body’s resources, we leave ourselves more vulnerable to the devil’s attacks.

For this reason, Satan works overtime to pull people away from the church by accusing and condemning it. Yes, the church is full of sinners; in fact, it is full of both weeds and wheat (cf. Matt 13:24-30). However, every army is full of people with flaws, but without trust in one another, no army can stand.

Therefore, in order to put on the shield of faith, we must depend upon the body of Christ—just like Roman soldiers depended on one another.

Are you depending on the body of Christ? Are you confessing your sins to one another and praying for one another (James 5:16)? Are you speaking the truth in love to one another (Eph 4:15)?

3. The shield of faith refers to living a life of faith—a life of serving God.

In ancient Roman armies, the people holding the thureos—the large shields—were always at the front of the army. They were the front line. When they lifted their shields, they protected those behind them. This also allowed the archers to shoot arrows while under their protection. Therefore, to put on the shield of faith means to live a life of faith—serving God.

It means stepping out of our comfort zone to serve in a ministry. It means using our gifts to serve the church. When we do so, we’ll be criticized by others, and we’ll be attacked emotionally, physically and spiritually by the enemy. But as we stand firm against these attacks with the shield of faith, we protect others and help them grow as they benefit from our faith.

To never get involved, use our spiritual gifts, or build others up means to not use the shield of faith. In fact, those not serving, not involved, often aren’t the focus of the enemy. Why waste resources on somebody who’s not fighting?

However, the more serious we get about God—the more we pursue God and serve others—the more Satan will attack us. In some ways, we should find encouragement from being attacked—this means we are a threat. And if we are not being attacked by the enemy, we should be alarmed. Maybe, we are not in the battle.

Application Question: In what ways have you experienced more spiritual attacks when pursuing and serving God?

Are you daily taking up the shield of faith? Are you living a life of faith or a life of fear? Are you depending on the body of Christ, or are you independent? Are you on the front line or the sidelines? If we are going to stand firm, we must take up the shield of faith.

Application Question: What aspects of the shield of faith stood out most and why? How is God calling you to take up his shield?

Conclusion

How can we stand firm in spiritual warfare?

1. Believers Stand Firm by Putting on the Footwear of Peace

As they appropriate the believers’ peace with God
As they appropriate the peace of God
As they share the gospel with others
As they walk in peace with others

2. Believers Stand Firm by Taking up the Shield of Faith

As they trust in God’s person
As they depend on the body of Christ
As they pursue and serve God

Scripture quotations marked KJV or AKJV are from the King James Version or Authorized (King James) Version of the Bible.

All emphases in Scripture quotations and commentators’ quotations have been added.

¹ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (p. 354). Chicago: Moody Press.

² MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (pp. 358–359). Chicago: Moody Press.

³ MacArthur, J. F., Jr. (1986). Ephesians (pp. 358–359). Chicago: Moody Press.

⁴ Wiersbe, W. W. (1996). The Bible exposition commentary (Vol. 2, p. 58). Wheaton, IL: Victor Books.

Appendix 3: Walking the Romans Road

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How can a person be saved? From what is he saved? How can someone have eternal life? Scripture teaches that after death each person will spend eternity either in heaven or hell. How can a person go to heaven?

Paul said this to Timothy:

But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. (2 Timothy 3:14-15)

One of the reasons God gave us Scripture is to make us wise for salvation. This means that without it nobody can know how to be saved.

Well then, how can a people be saved and what are they being saved from? A common method of sharing the good news of salvation is through the Romans Road. One of the great themes, not only of the Bible, but specifically of the book of Romans is salvation. In Romans, the author, Paul, clearly details the steps we must take in order to be saved.

How can we be saved? What steps must we take?

Step One: We Must Accept that We Are Sinners

Romans 3:23 says, “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” What does it mean to sin? The word sin means “to miss the mark.” The mark we missed is looking like God. When God created mankind in the Genesis narrative, he created man in the “image of God” (1:27). The “image of God” means many things, but probably, most importantly it means we were made to be holy just as he is holy. Man was made moral. We were meant to reflect God’s holiness in every way: the way we think, the way we talk, and the way we act. And any time we miss the mark in these areas, we commit sin.

Furthermore, we do not only sin when we commit a sinful act such as: lying, stealing, or cheating. Again, we sin anytime we have a wrong heart motive. The greatest commandments in Scripture are to “Love God with all our heart, mind, and soul and to love others as ourselves” (Matt 22:36-40, paraphrase). Whenever we don’t love God supremely and love others as ourselves, we sin and fall short of the glory of God. For this reason, man is always in a state of sinning. Sadly, even if our actions are good, our heart is bad. I have never loved God with my whole heart, mind, and soul and neither has anybody else. Therefore, we have all sinned and fall short of the glory of God (Rom 3:23). We have all missed the mark of God’s holiness and we must accept this.

What’s the next step?

Step Two: We Must Understand We Are Under the Judgment of God

Why are we under the judgment of God? It is because of our sins. Scripture teaches God is not only a loving God, but he is a just God. And his justice requires judgment for each of our sins. Romans 6:23 says, “For the wages of sin is death.”

A wage is something we earn. Every time we sin, we earn the wage of death. What is death? Death really means separation. In physical death, the body is separated from the spirit, but in spiritual death, man is separated from God. Man currently lives in a state of spiritual death (cf. Eph 2:1-3). We do not love God, obey him, or know him as we should. Therefore, man is in a state of death.

Moreover, one day at our physical death, if we have not been saved, we will spend eternity separated from God in a very real hell. In hell, we will pay the wage for each of our sins. Therefore, in hell people will experience various degrees of punishment (cf. Lk 12:47-48). This places man in a very dangerous predicament—unholy and therefore under the judgment of God.

How should we respond to this? This leads us to our third step.

Step Three: We Must Recognize God Has Invited All to Accept His Free Gift of Salvation

Romans 6:23 does not stop at the wages of sin being death. It says, “For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” Because God loved everybody on the earth, he offered the free gift of eternal life, which anyone can receive through Jesus Christ.

Because it is a gift, it cannot be earned. We cannot work for it. Ephesians 2:8-9 says, “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast.”

Going to church, being baptized, giving to the poor, or doing any other righteous work does not save. Salvation is a gift that must be received from God. It is a gift that has been prepared by his effort alone.

How do we receive this free gift?

Step Four: We Must Believe Jesus Christ Died for Our Sins and Rose from the Dead

If we are going to receive this free gift, we must believe in God’s Son, Jesus Christ. Because God loved us, cared for us, and didn’t want us to be separated from him eternally, he sent his Son to die for our sins. Romans 5:8 says, “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Similarly, John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son that whosoever believeth in him should not perish but have eternal life.” God so loved us that he gave his only Son for our sins.

Jesus Christ was a real, historical person who lived 2,000 years ago. He was born of a virgin. He lived a perfect life. He was put to death by the Romans and the Jews. And he rose again on the third day. In his death, he took our sins and God’s wrath for them and gave us his perfect righteousness so we could be accepted by God. Second Corinthians 5:21 says, “God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.” God did all this so we could be saved from his wrath.

Christ’s death satisfied the just anger of God over our sins. When God saw Jesus on the cross, he saw us and our sins and therefore judged Jesus. And now, when God sees those who are saved, he sees his righteous Son and accepts us. In salvation, we have become the righteousness of God.

If we are going to be saved, if we are going to receive this free gift of salvation, we must believe in Christ’s death, burial, and resurrection for our sins (cf. 1 Cor 15:3-5, Rom 10:9-10). Do you believe?

Step Five: We Must Confess Christ as Lord of Our Lives

Romans 10:9-10 says,

That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved.

Not only must we believe, but we must confess Christ as Lord of our lives. It is one thing to believe in Christ but another to follow Christ. Simple belief does not save. Christ must be our Lord. James said this: “Even the demons believe and shudder” (James 2:19) but the demons are not saved—Christ is not their Lord.

Another aspect of making Christ Lord is repentance. Repentance really means a change of mind that leads to a change of direction. Before we met Christ, we were living our own life and following our own sinful desires. But when we get saved, our mind and direction change. We start to follow Christ as Lord.

How do we make this commitment to the lordship of Christ so we can be saved? Paul said we must confess with our mouth “Jesus is Lord” as we believe in him. Romans 10:13 says, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”

If you admit that you are a sinner and understand you are under God’s wrath because of them; if you believe Jesus Christ is the Son of God, that he died on the cross for your sins, and rose from the dead for your salvation; if you are ready to turn from your sin and cling to Christ as Lord, you can be saved.

If this is your heart, then you can pray this prayer and commit to following Christ as your Lord.

Dear heavenly Father, I confess I am a sinner and have fallen short of your glory, what you made me for. I believe Jesus Christ died on the cross to pay the penalty for my sins and rose from the dead so I can have eternal life. I am turning away from my sin and accepting you as my Lord and Savior. Come into my life and change me. Thank you for your gift of salvation.

Scripture teaches that if you truly accepted Christ as your Lord, then you are a new creation. Second Corinthians 5:17 says, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” God has forgiven your sins (1 John 1:9), he has given you his Holy Spirit (Rom 8:15), and he is going to disciple you and make you into the image of his Son (cf. Rom 8:29). He will never leave you nor forsake you (Heb 13:5), and he will complete the work he has begun in your life (Phil 1:6). In heaven, angels and saints are rejoicing because of your commitment to Christ (Lk 15:7).

Praise God for his great salvation! May God keep you in his hand, empower you through the Holy Spirit, train you through mature believers, and use you to build his kingdom! “The one who calls you is faithful, he will do it” (1 Thess 5:24). God bless you!

Scripture quotations marked KJV or AKJV are from the King James Version or Authorized (King James) Version of the Bible.

All emphases in Scripture quotations and commentators’ quotations have been added.

Appendix 2: Reflection Questions

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Writing is one of the best ways to learn. In class, we take notes and write papers, and all these methods are used to help us learn and retain the material. The same is true with the Word of God. Obviously, all of the authors of Scripture were writers. This helped them better learn the Scriptures and also enabled them to more effectively teach it. In studying God’s Word with the Bible Teacher’s Guide, take time to write so you can similarly grow both in your learning and teaching.

How would you summarize the main points of the text/chapter? Write a brief summary.
What stood out to you most in the reading? Did any of the contents trigger any memories or experiences? If so, please share them.
What follow–up questions do you have about the reading? Are there parts you do not fully agree with?
What applications did you take from the reading, and how do you plan to implement them in your life?
Write several goals: As a result of my time studying God’s Word, I aspire to . . .
What are some practical ways to pray as a result of studying the text? Spend some time in prayer.

Appendix 1: Study Group Tips

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Leading a small group using the Bible Teacher’s Guide can be done in various ways. One format is the “study group” model, where each member prepares and shares in the teaching. This appendix will cover tips for facilitating a weekly study group.

Each week the members of the study group read through a selected chapter of the guide, answer the reflection questions (see Appendix 2), and come prepared to share in the group.
Prior to each meeting, a different member is selected to lead the group and share his answer to Question 1 of the reflection questions, which is a short summary of the chapter read. This section of the gathering could last from five to fifteen minutes. This way, each member can develop his ability to teach and will be motivated to study harder during the week. Or, each week the same person could share the summary.
After the summary has been given, the leader for that week facilitates discussion of the remaining reflection questions and selected questions from the chapter.
After discussion, the group shares prayer requests and members pray for one another.

The strength of the study group is that the members are required to prepare their responses before the meeting, allowing for easier discussion. Another is that each member has the opportunity to further develop his ministry skills through teaching. These are distinct advantages.

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17. Living in the Light While Residing in a Dark World

To Live in the Light, Believers Must Produce the Fruit of Light

1. Goodness.

2. Righteousness.

3. Truth.

To Live in the Light, Believers Must Continually Discern What Pleases God

1. Believers test and discern God’s will by using God’s Word.

2. Believers test and discern God’s will by putting God first in their lives.

3. Believers test and discern God’s will by not conforming to the pattern of the world.

4. Believers test and discern God’s will by considering both their heart desires and whether they have peace in their hearts.

5. Believers test and discern God’s will by considering the counsel of other believers.

6. Believers test and discern God’s will by considering open and closed doors.

To Live in the Light, Believers Must Not Partake in Darkness, but Expose It

1. Believers expose darkness indirectly by living holy lives.

2. Believers expose darkness directly by words of correction.

3. Believers expose darkness by not even talking about things that happen in the dark.

In Order to Live in the Light, Believers Must Convert Darkness into Light

To Live in the Light, Believers Must Preach to the Sleeping

Conclusion

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18. Living a Life of Wisdom Instead of Foolishness

Believers Live a Life of Wisdom by Making the Most of Their Time

1. We must recognize how short our time is.

2. We must plan prayerfully.

3. We must be willing to pay the price.

4. We must stay away from evil.

Believers Live a Life of Wisdom by Understanding God’s Will

1. To understand God’s will, we must know the Word of God.

2. To understand God’s will, we must pray.

3. To understand God’s will, we must rely on the body of Christ.

Believers Live a Life of Wisdom by Staying Sober

Believers Live a Life of Wisdom by Being Filled with the Spirit

Common Misunderstandings

1. To be filled with the Spirit is not a crazy, ecstatic experience that involves falling on the floor, shaking uncontrollably, or barking like a dog.

2. To be filled with the Spirit is not the same as the baptism of the Spirit.

How to Be Filled

1. Believers are filled through yielding to the Spirit’s control.

2. Believers are filled through dwelling in the Word of God.

3. Believers are filled through prayer.

4. Believers are filled through worship.

5. Believers are filled through faithfully enduring trials.

Results

1. A result of being filled is corporate worship.

2. A result of being filled is individual worship.

3. A result of being filled is thankfulness.

4. A result of being filled is submission.

Conclusion

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19. Characteristics of a Spirit-filled Marriage

1. The wife must submit to her husband because it is her duty to Christ.

2. The wife must submit to her husband because he is her head.

Trinitarian Argument

Order of Creation Argument

Adam Naming Eve

3. Wives must submit to their husbands because marriage symbolizes Christ’s relationship to the church.

In a Spirit-filled Marriage, the Husband Loves His Wife

1. The husband’s love must be realistic.

2. The husband’s love must be sacrificial.

3. The husband’s love must be sanctifying.

4. The husband’s love must be humble.

5. The husband’s love must be personal.

In a Spirit-filled Marriage, the Husband and Wife Meet Each Other’s Deepest Need

Conclusion

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20. Characteristics of a Spirit-filled Home

In a Spirit-filled Home, Children Obey and Honor Their Parents

1. In order to obey their parents, children must listen to them.

2. In order to obey their parents, children must submit to them.

3. In order to obey their parents, children must be faithful to the Lord.

In a Spirit-filled Home, Children Understand the Importance of Obeying and Honoring Their Parents

1. Children should obey and honor their parents because it is ethical.

2. Children should obey and honor their parents because it brings prosperity.

3. Children should obey and honor their parents because it promotes a long life.

In a Spirit-filled Home, Parents Do Not Exasperate Their Children

1. Parents exasperate their children by not disciplining them.