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The Average Male Is…

  • Is 5’ 9” tall and 173 pounds.
  • Is married, 1.8 years older than his wife and would marry her again.
  • Has not completed college.
  • Earns $28,605 per year.
  • Prefers showering to taking a bath.
  • Spends about 7.2 hours a week eating.
  • Does not know his cholesterol count, but it’s 211.
  • Watches 26 hours and 44 minutes of TV a week.
  • Takes out the garbage in his household.
  • Prefers white underwear to colored.
  • Cries about once a month—one fourth as much as Jane Doe.
  • Falls in love an average of six times during his life.
  • Eats his corn on the cob in circles, not straight across, and prefers his steak medium.
  • Can’t whistle by inserting his fingers in his mouth.
  • Prefers that his toilet tissue unwind over, rather than under, the spool.
  • Has sex 2.55 times a week.
  • Daydreams mostly about sex.
  • Thinks he looks okay in the nude.
  • Will not stop to ask for directions when he’s in the car.

Men’s Health, quoted in Parade Magazine, 12-29-91, p. 5